Many of us are still wary of this kind of intimacy. If a man loves anal sex, does that mean he’s openly homosexual? If a woman prefers anal sex to traditional, how can this be explained?
According to etymology (pervert — “turn, turn inside out”), perversion is a violation of the norm, a deviation from the natural destiny. Although, in this logic, a kiss can also be called a perversion — after all, the mouth is needed in order to eat and talk! According to the notions of morality, which often arose under the influence of religion, as soon as the sexual practice deviates from the goal of procreation, it can be classified as perversions. So treated yesterday to oral sex, and today the same thing happens with anal.
Freud defined perversion as an impulsive desire to reduce the role of a partner to an object, denying the difference between the sexes. But why then condemn a woman who wants to get pleasure through the anus? Or reproach a man who likes the sensation of squeezing the penis with the muscles of the anus, more elastic than those of the vagina? Here it would be worth paying attention to something else. If for a woman anal sex is the only way to pleasure, perhaps for some reason she wants to move away from the sensations in the vaginal area. This is what happens after rape: a woman blames herself for what happened to her, and avoids vaginal penetration, fearing to experience pleasure from it.
And the man? What makes him prefer anal contact that does not involve the female sexual organs? The answer is probably this: if in the psyche of each of us there are homo- and heterosexual impulses, then anal sex provides an opportunity to play with this duality inherent in us by nature. Many people like this ambiguity of roles, and this does not mean at all that men who practice anal sex are all prone to homosexuality — nor are women who penetrate a man with a finger or a sex toy.
Be that as it may, it is important not to engage in anal sex «out of obligation.» Both partners must be interested and willing to try this method. No, they don’t have to — but they are free. And they always have a choice.
About the Author: Catherine Blanc is the author of Women’s Sexuality (La sexualité des femmes n’est pas celle des magazines, Évolution, 2009).