Is a healthy relationship really that good?

Getting out of an unhealthy relationship is not easy. They need to be saddened, let go of everything bad and say goodbye to what was dear. In contrast to bad experiences, healthy relationships seem like a gift from above, but the absence of alarm calls does not mean that you have found “the right one”.

The main problem with unhealthy relationships is that we lose ourselves as a person, trying to adapt to the unrealistic and inflated demands of a manipulative partner. We seem to reduce ourselves, if only we were loved. And when we find someone who is ready to accept us as we are, completely, we think: “Finally! Now I know what true love is.”

Then the thought comes: “Is he really the one?” After all, he simply has to be? Everything is moving so smoothly and beautifully! Before you put on a crown with the inscription “Till death do us part”, think about a few points.

1. Don’t give up on passion

You have spent a considerable amount of time in unhealthy relationships, where the understanding of the normality of what is happening has been violated. Although the new “normality” seems to be the highest good for you now, take your time. Just because a relationship is healthy doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Don’t give up true love for a healthy relationship. And your new partner, who treats you so well and respectfully right now, deserves someone who will love him with all her heart.

2. Work on trust

After an unhealthy relationship, you want to feel safe. But previous experience will provoke inappropriate reactions: for example, tantrums due to the fact that he did not immediately respond to your message in the messenger or that he went to lunch with a nice colleague. He cannot predict all your reactions and cannot know all the nuances of injuries. Try not to fall into the temptation and demand that he live by looking back on your past relationship, allow yourself to relax.

3. Try not to project

Your new chosen one is not responsible for the actions of the predecessor. Even the most emotionally and mentally healthy person has flaws, but you should not actively look for them. Who seeks will always find. Unpleasant qualities or uncomfortable habits will manifest themselves over time, it is up to you to decide how important they are for you. No need to paranoid write them down from the first day they met.

4. Don’t expect too much

No matter how much you want to try on the image of a knight in shining armor on a new partner, try not to do it. Yes, men like to help women, but few people want to make it their daily duty. They are looking for women with whom they can be one team, who are ready to work on relationships and enjoy life together. From the one that is waiting to be saved from misfortune and a broken heart, such a man will run away.

5. Understand yourself

If you have been in an unhealthy relationship more than once, it may indicate that you have unresolved internal traumas and problems that cause you to choose such partners. If your current partner is the healthiest of all, and you yourself are fluttering with happiness and love, do not rush into obligations. If this is indeed the same, it deserves a responsible approach. If you sort out your internal contradictions and problems before connecting your life with an emotionally healthy man, the chance for a happy future will be higher.