Contents
Get rid of anxiety. Stop the incessant monologue in your head. Learn to relax. Psychotherapists around the world hear such requests every day, and over the past year they have become even more frequent. Let’s try to take a closer look at people who have learned to live in peace with themselves and with the surrounding reality in the midst of all this chaos.
1. They don’t learn to “actively relax”
Just lying on the couch and looking at the ceiling (or out the window at the crows) is not fashionable today – many people prefer to “actively relax”: run, play sports, dance. But inner restlessness simply does not allow them to sit still.
And those who have found inner peace are able to slow down and stay in a static state for as long as they want. They do not need to fill every minute of their day with events and impressions and remain productive. They really know how to relax.
2. They arrive early
Such people never run to a meeting at the last moment. They don’t have to stay up all night to get the job done on time. They don’t rush down the stairs holding hastily packed bags. They know how the rush affects their pressure and stress levels, so they always allow more time for the tasks that need to be completed.
3. They don’t teach others how to live.
As a rule, such people are able to clearly convey their point of view to those around them, without standing on a stool and without tearing the ligaments. They won’t argue violently over something they can’t control, whether it’s politics, the results of a sports match, or other people’s weird behavior.
They don’t post in the heat of the moment without thinking about who their words might offend. They say what they think and do it calmly, which means they don’t suffer later with guilt for what they said.
4. They don’t try to control everything.
They do not try to know the outcome of events for certain. Do not judge others, allowing them to make their own choices. And most importantly, they easily adapt to rapidly changing circumstances.
5. They mostly live in the present.
Of course, it is impossible to live only in the present moment: the past made us who we are, and few people are completely free from worries about the future. But those who have found inner peace try to accept life as it is, and not as it should be. And they are good in their “now”.
6. They manage their time wisely
They spend their resources on what matters most to them. If this is a family, they will not hang around at work, working up a sweat, even if it will bring them more money. If a career is important to them, they will not spend their lives in bars. They make informed choices and manage their time well.
7. They are self-compassionate
Of course, those who have found inner peace also happen to make mistakes. But they do not identify themselves with failure, they do not allow the nasty voice of the inner critic to command them. They either do their best to fix the mistake or just let go. They give themselves time to rest and forgive themselves.
8. Communicating with them makes others feel better
The time spent in their company has a positive effect on our condition: the heart rate returns to normal, thoughts calm down, the feeling of heaviness disappears. We begin to breathe deeper and easier. Associating with such people is a gift: accept it with gratitude and do everything possible to keep them in your life.