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Have you ever found yourself in an awkward position, confusing Kant with Comte, and Monet with Manet, or decided that Montenegro is the capital of Montenegro? Whether we are talking about science, art or geography, we are often ashamed of knowledge gaps. But is there any basis for this?
Whenever it comes to painting or music, 37-year-old Zhanna feels a betrayal emptiness in her stomach. “I have some general ideas, but they are not very deep,” she says. – And while my interlocutors are pouring names and information, I am deafly silent. Do not show everyone that I only know about the Wanderers that they are artists – and not a single last name in my memory … “Zhanna is sure that she seriously lacks education in everything except cinema (“I watch two or three films in a week, so something gets stuck in my head”). And although she is sure that there are huge gaps in her knowledge, nothing suggests that this is really the case. And who generally determines how much knowledge is needed to consider oneself a sufficiently educated and cultured person?
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I focus on those around me. We often judge ourselves by comparing ourselves to someone we know. And as an example, we choose the best – well-educated people, next to whom we feel even more “insignificance”. “We do this because we are looking in the outside world for the confidence that we would need to find inside ourselves,” explains psychologist Laurie Hawks.1. In other words, “to respect ourselves, we need to be appreciated by others”: in assessing our cultural level, we rely on them, and not on our own feelings.
Larisa, 39 years old, beauty editor
“At 30, I was offered a position with a higher level of responsibility. It also meant a lot of meetings, cocktails and events where “backroom talk” is important. To support such conversations, I definitely did not have enough education. A friend helped – she took me to museums, exhibitions, advised me what to read … As a result, I got carried away, and the knowledge that I considered as a tool for career growth became my real wealth. And I’m happy to complete it.”
Family history influences me. How was culture treated in my family? This question in many cases provides a clue. Parents who attach great importance to this side of education can cause complexes in children. However, poorly educated adults are also able to push the child to judge his own enlightenment too harshly. Laurie Hawkes calls this “class neurosis”: even having risen above your parents on the social ladder or trying to catch up by visiting museums and concert halls tirelessly, it is difficult to completely free yourself from the feeling of your own inferiority.
I listen to my inner critic. Why, with the same level of culture, some of us live in peace, while others are tormented by the consciousness of their imperfection? It is more difficult for those, says the psychologist, who listen to their “internal infantile critic.” Who are still haunted by bad answers in school, the failure of their first attempts at flirting, and the feeling of worthlessness that accompanied other situations in childhood and adolescence – which as a result formed the belief: “I am not a cultured person.” Nevertheless, the voice of the inner critic can be useful, because it is an open door to our unconscious. After hearing what he wants to tell us, we can ask ourselves who speaks to us in this way. And so get access to the origins of their complexes.
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What to do?
Assess your weaknesses
Do you think you lack education? Check if this is the case by talking to someone you trust. But even if it turns out that this is the case, do not make a tragedy out of it. “It is important to gain not so much knowledge as self-confidence,” says Laurie Hawkes. “Otherwise, culture may turn out to be a curtain hiding an inferiority complex.”
Develop for yourself
If the cultural level is important to you, then why not increase it? “But do it for your own pleasure, not to conform to a social norm,” says the psychologist. So delve into areas that interest you and don’t worry about not meeting mythical academic standards.
Make a program
We will proceed from the fact that the low level of your general culture has been proven. How much do you want to raise it? For some, it may be enough to know that Beethoven is not only the name of a dog from a popular film. Lori Hawks suggests making a plan. Decide how much knowledge and in what area you would like to receive. You can listen to a course of lectures and even turn to tutors – they will help you get acquainted with literature, history or a foreign language at a pace that is convenient for you.
1 Laurie Hawkes is the author of Petit Traité de lucidité sur soi-même et sur les autres, Payot, 2014.