They flatly refuse to drive. They are not tempted by speed, freedom of movement, or empowerment. They explain their reluctance for various reasons: from fear of failure to concern for the environment. But is there something else behind these arguments?
“At a party, my husband and I constantly look at our watches in order to be in time before the metro closes,” admits 32-year-old Arina. And if he and George are still late, then they have to call a taxi or ask their friends to give them a lift. And yet the spouses do not plan to get rights, they have never crossed the threshold of a driving school.
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Fear of discipleship. “Studying something again, then taking exams is like going back to school,” explains 41-year-old Georgy. — This is not for me!» For those who didn’t get a driver’s license at a young age, it’s often hard to make up your mind and start cramming the rules. “For those who have not had the best memories of school life, study is associated with humiliation, the experience of their failure. And even years later, they instinctively try to avoid repeating such an experience, ”explains psychologist Inna Shifanova. The prospect of being on the same bench with very young fellow students is also disturbing. “Many men and women are not ready to start studying, not because it is difficult for them to learn the material, but because they are afraid to look in the eyes of others (and in their own eyes) not as solid professionals, but as beginning students,” says the psychologist. “And the less self-confident a person is, the more he fears the reproaches and ridicule of others.” Some decide not to face the possibility of failure so as not to put their self-esteem to further tests.
«Catastrophic Forecast». “I feel uneasy at the thought that I will have to be responsible for the lives of my passengers,” admits 42-year-old Saveliy. “It’s a pity to lose money on fines, but there is always such a danger on the road,” says 28-year-old Nina. “It’s scary: because of my insecurity or awkwardness, people can suffer,” 36-year-old Natalya explains her reluctance to drive. Sometimes the situation on the road is seen as something beyond our control. “Such an irrational fear may be the result of psychological trauma if someone close was injured in an accident,” adds Inna Shifanova. “If grief is not experienced, it is very difficult to decide to drive, saying to yourself: I have my own life, with other events.”
Tendency to be subordinate. The road is one of the most enduring symbols of human life. “Learning to drive a car would mean learning to drive your life,” Inna Shifanova draws an analogy. And for many, this is a difficult task. Several generations in our country grew up under the yoke of an official ideology that encouraged the willingness to submit to others without hesitation and to suppress one’s own initiative. The fragility of the boundaries between law and arbitrariness gave rise to anxiety and uncertainty that our well-being depends on ourselves. Much has changed since then, but the patterns of behavior imprinted in the collective unconscious continue to affect us. The habit of a non-adult attitude to life (“Someone has to do something for me, but I myself (a) can’t and can do little”) is still very strong.” When we sit behind the wheel, we have no one to delegate responsibility. And no matter how strong the desire to rely on someone who decides everything for us, we have to give it up.