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Do you feel like you’re not accomplishing anything at all? Do you seem to be skipping all the deadlines and not crossing old tasks off your to-do list, but only adding new ones? Perhaps you have the so-called “driven disease”. How to deal with it?
It is no coincidence that the name of this condition is put in quotation marks – you cannot find such a disease in any medical reference book, however, the state of chronic “failure”, extreme agitation due to eternal haste and the feeling that it is simply impossible to cope with everything, is familiar to many.
The term was coined by cardiologists Meyer Friedman and Ray Rosenman back in 1974: according to their hypothesis, people who are prone to this condition are more likely to experience heart problems.
A direct link between these phenomena was not subsequently found, but the researchers found that those suffering from the “driven disease” are focused on the short term and small achievements, impatient with others and aimed at competition.
How to “diagnose” the “driven disease” in yourself and what to do next?
1. You treat everything like a race.
Some situations, circumstances, and tasks really force us to hurry – for example, when we need to catch our flight or apply for a grant on time. However, quite often such a rush is useless.
The problem is that people with “trapped disease” are often unable to tell one from the other. “If you find yourself treating even everyday household chores like shopping or cleaning the house like a race, and the slightest delay causes you to have an anxiety attack, it’s time to be wary: you may be prone to this ailment,” explains psychologist Lee Chambers.
2. You are always running multiple tasks in parallel.
Moreover, you are simply not able to focus on one thing. “The brain immediately starts throwing ideas at you about what else you can fill in the pause while you brush your teeth or wait for your dinner to warm up in the microwave,” comments coach Richard Jolly.
3. You are terribly annoyed by any delay.
The queue at the supermarket, the many kilometers of traffic jams, the need to wait in the doctor’s office – all this literally boils your blood, even if you have the rest of the day free and you are not late for anything.
You keep pressing the elevator button, as if hoping that this way the doors will close faster and you will finally go. You dislike wasting time so much that from the outside your behavior may even look comical.
4. You constantly feel like you’re behind schedule.
Even if there is no schedule. It doesn’t matter – there are clearly not enough hours in a day to do everything. And no matter how much you have actually done, the feeling of failure does not leave you.
5. You interrupt others
Not at all on purpose – you may not want to seem rude, but every now and then you interrupt your interlocutors (especially those who speak slowly) – simply because you have already understood everything and hurry to finish for them!
6. You’re obsessed with checking things off your to-do list.
It gives you great pleasure. And everything would be fine – but, not having time to enjoy what you have achieved, you immediately proceed to the next point. Alas, it doesn’t make you productive. Quite the contrary: the probability of making a mistake with this approach increases.
Why is that bad?
Because all spheres of life suffer: both our condition – physical and mental – and work, and relationships. First, chronic stress can weaken the immune system, disrupt sleep, and lead to energy deficiencies.
Secondly, in a permanent state of rush, it is extremely difficult to focus on something, which affects both productivity and mood.
“Finally, we get angry at others—those who might be causing delays—get irritated, frustrated, and feel like a failure,” Chambers explains.
The desire to do more and more in less time prevents us from building deep relationships with others.
“We get angry at loved ones who do not keep up with us, we are not in contact with them at the moment, it is increasingly difficult for us to show empathy, because emotional support takes up our precious time … As a result, conflicts and even partings,” the expert emphasizes.
What to do?
Determine what is really important to get done as quickly as possible and what can wait
Treating any task as if it should have been done “yesterday” is a direct path to stress. It is worth mastering the skill of prioritizing and taking on only really “burning” tasks, calmly leaving everything else for later.
“To do this, learn to treat time as a friend, not an enemy,” advises psychologist Michael Ashworth. – Reflect on how you relate to time, how you perceive it and what is really important to you in life. Arrange things in a certain order, based on a long-term perspective.
And be sure to take at least some time to take care of yourself! Yes, for those who suffer from the “disease of driven out”, relaxation is not easy. Start small: plan not a whole weekend dedicated solely to yourself, but at least half an hour or an hour.
“This time is worth spending on what you really enjoy, energize you and bring you pleasure,” explains Chambers. “It could be reading, walking, meditating – it’s up to you.”
Create an evening ritual
If you find it difficult to turn off your restless brain closer to the night, come up with a nightly routine that will help you calm down and fall asleep faster. It could be a warm shower, a cup of tea, or journaling.
Sleep helps us recover both physically and emotionally, so don’t let daytime anxiety deprive you of it.
Give yourself time to think
Yes, in the mode of eternal haste, the advice “make time for yourself to think” can be annoying, but when you frantically rush from one task to another, keeping the whole picture in your head is quite problematic, and you want to achieve your global goals sooner or later, is not it?
Enlist the support of loved ones
Changing habits isn’t easy, but you don’t have to walk this path alone. Ask your loved ones to help you: for example, they can “slow down” you when you start to slip into old habits again, and offer to replace them with new, healthier ones.
“With the support of friends and loved ones, you will learn to notice harmful patterns and triggers, slow down in time and refrain from habitual behavior,” says Chambers. “If one environment is not enough, you can always resort to professional help.”