Some people love to read, while others… never do. They are simply not able to delve into the plot, get carried away by fiction – and do not while away the winter evening with a book in their hands. How is it that the pleasure of reading is not available to them?
“It’s been more than a month since I last opened the book,” says 33-year-old Olga. “But even that time it didn’t go beyond the first pages.” Too much work, too little free time … In the evening, tired, she habitually sits in front of the TV.
“In the modern world, where everything happens so quickly, reading is often sacrificed,” says psychologist Natalya Evsikova. “The book takes time, while visual culture immediately satisfies our need for pleasure.” And yet, when Olga studied at the institute, both video and the Internet were already available. But she read a lot. Why, having become an adult, she, like many others, lost interest in this occupation? Lost joy.
Psychoanalyst Michel Declerc talks about his young patient – he not only never read, but could not even be in a room with books. “He was a brilliant student,” recalls the psychoanalyst. But the constant demands of his parents broke him. His distaste for learning focused on what represented learning best: books.
As adults, we fuss and cannot stand inaction. However, inaction is a necessary condition for reading
It is the books that remind some of school failures, others that they have “overdone themselves with reading.” And as a result, the process itself no longer brings joy. The pleasure of books is easier to experience for those of us whose parents were addicted to reading: whether they read adult books to themselves or read fairy tales aloud to a child.
And vice versa, if adults did it reluctantly, preferring, for example, TV, then there was simply no one to learn to love books. “It happens that adults, as soon as their children master the technique of reading, get off with the words “now you can read yourself,” says Natalya Evsikova. – But the child still does not know how to follow the plot with his eyes, so far he can only perceive it by ear. The feeling of impotence in front of a block of text, experienced in childhood, can discourage the taste for reading for a long time.
There is another important point. It seems that our time requires increased activity. “Parents often prioritize action over the development of imagination, emotion, and the ability to think. We want children to become competitive, but in reality we often make them hyperactive,” notes Natalia Evsikova. – As adults, they fuss a lot and cannot stand inactivity. However, inaction is a necessary condition for reading.”
inability to rest
“I take a book, but from the very first lines I start thinking about something else,” admits 40-year-old Ilya. “What to do, who to call… I can’t concentrate.”
“In order to read with interest, you need to be able to relax,” Natalya Evsikova comments. This is especially difficult for anxious people. It is important for them to keep everything under control, to take part in everything. When such a person flips through the pages, it begins to seem to him that while he is “absent”, something bad will happen – or something important that he will miss. And he puts down the book.
To be carried away by the adventures and experiences of the heroes, one must be sure that in our own world everything is in order and it can be left unattended for an hour or two.
Fear of meeting yourself
An inability to read can be one of the symptoms of depression. You have to be on good terms with yourself to be alone with a book. “This loneliness can be unbearable if it is not softened by the imagination, filled with memories and dreams,” explains Michel Declerc.
Thanks to the imagination, words come to life, evoke inner images and thoughts, awaken feelings. “Imagination can be developed,” says Natalia Evsikova. – The earlier a person begins to fantasize, the better he will learn to imagine invented situations and characters. The more pleasure he will get, following the imagination of the author.
However, not knowing in advance what situations the characters will find themselves in, some avoid the unpredictability of reading, as they are afraid to encounter something that will remind them of an unpleasant personal experience, reopen old wounds. But, protecting themselves from sad experiences, they simultaneously lose the opportunity to soften them.
Oleg, 40 years old, translator
“Reading turned out to be a “collateral casualty” of my depression. For many years, any mental activity required incredible efforts from me. The head was too heavy, thoughts seemed to get stuck in it. I started psychotherapy. And although I never mentioned the difficulties I had in reading, as I progressed in therapy, it became easier for me to read. And now I open the book again with anticipation of joy.”
What to do?
“When reading is no longer a part of learning or a duty, the pleasure can return: there will be a feeling of true freedom, won from the daily routine,” says Michel Declerc. It is important to remember that there is no good or bad reading. Comics, detective story or romance… Nothing obliges you to immediately take on the classics, especially if they dishearten you and cause rejection.
“The way to reading is through listening. Children listen first and then read to themselves. Listening can help adults too,” explains Natalya Evsikova. – Buy good audiobooks – they will give a new impetus to your imagination. And then take the same works, but in book binding. Most likely, you will be curious to read them.