There are those among us who react painfully to any unforeseen sound. They are annoyed even by the quiet noise from the headphones of a person sitting next to them. What is the reason for this increased sensitivity? And how to survive in a world where there is less and less room for silence?
At the same time that I am working on this material, the issue is being handed over – and behind my back the designers are discussing the intricacies of politics, and at the next table a colleague is talking to the editor-in-chief. Concentration in such conditions is simply unthinkable! But this happens every month. I endured a year, and then I realized that this would not change, and recently I bought headphones with large “ears” so as not to disturb others. Now I am writing while listening to Bach. To be honest, I would prefer complete silence, but since this is impossible, then between the excited voices and the Musical Offering, I choose the latter.
Olga, 45 years
The conversation of fellow travelers in the subway, the barking of a dog outside the window, a party at a neighboring dacha – all this instantly infuriates 36-year-old Love. “I feel extremely irritated,” she admits. “This noise absorbs my thoughts, everything else seems to cease to exist for me, and only this sound torture remains.”
I have a heightened hearing
Different people perceive sounds differently. Some of us will walk past a working jackhammer without wincing, while others will twitch at the slamming of the closed door.
“Some people have heightened hearing,” explains otolaryngologist Elena Fedotova. This phenomenon is called hyperacusis, or increased hearing acuity. Their inner ear is more developed than others. But sounds can cause severe discomfort, annoy and even hurt those who, on the contrary, have hearing loss.”
I feel insecure
“The sound that we “did not order” can involuntarily be perceived as an invasion of our inner territory, as a threat to our tranquility or lifestyle,” explains family psychologist Inna Shifanova. “It triggers our physiological flight-or-fight response.
Pulse and respiration become more frequent, muscles involuntarily tighten, sweating increases. Our attention is focused on the source of danger – this is also part of our instinctive program, which is why it is so difficult for us to distract ourselves from this sound. If at the same time we can neither escape nor fight, then we experience this situation as a state of complete helplessness. It intensifies if the sounds cause unpleasant associations.
“We are especially annoyed by those that we associate with a value system alien to us,” says psychotherapist and neuroscientist Beatrice Milletre. So, an elderly person, most likely, will hardly endure the rap that his grandson listens to. The grandson can be annoyed by the recording of Ruslanova’s songs.
According to the psychotherapist, this trend is generally characteristic of our era: “We live in a society that is developing in an individualistic direction much stronger than ever before. Everyone believes that the world should adapt to him.
I let off steam
“When we are happy, it is difficult to piss us off and we don’t even notice many obstacles,” Inna Shifanova recalls. “However, if we are tired, upset, or have difficulty achieving inner balance, an extraneous sound can unsettle us. And the irritation that we feel about this absorbs the energy of our dissatisfaction with everything else.
The paradox is that this same situation gives us a chance to regain our confidence in our own strength – by expressing our anger or doing something to protect ourselves from unwanted noises.
What to do?
Visit an otolaryngologist
“Increased sensitivity to noise can be a symptom of incipient deafness,” cautions Elena Fedotova. She advises getting an examination, and also stresses the importance of respecting hearing: “Too loud music, working in conditions of constant high level noise can damage the inner ear, but it does not recover.” As you know, prevention is better than cure.
Consider protection
“Try to create a suitable sound environment for yourself, change it depending on the mood and the moment,” suggests Beatrice Milletre. “Pick up some nice music, put on a CD with nature sounds, use double glazing and even earplugs.”
Consider context
“We respond to the situation as a whole, and not just to a specific stimulus,” emphasizes Inna Shifanova. – The howl of a car alarm under the windows will annoy you much more if you have just entered this apartment and found a lot of flaws in it than if you have lived there for a long time and, in addition, sympathize with the neighbor who owns the car. Treat your irritation as an occasion to analyze the situation and think about what and how to change for the better.