The habit of eating problems with something tasty is familiar to many of us. Nutritionists, psychologists and coaches at special trainings offer to get rid of food addiction. One of them was visited by our correspondent.
“Hello, I’m Masha, and I can’t live without chocolate.” Yes, this confession is terribly reminiscent of the meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous (they say everyone there starts with a similar phrase), and, I must say, the seminar leader, analytical psychologist Svetlana Kostina-Erykalova confirms the legitimacy of this inelegant comparison.
According to research, when people see chocolate, the same areas of the brain are activated as when they use drugs. So it’s even worse? But.
Most of all, I was afraid to hear advice to accept and love ourselves for who we are. But no, it passed. Svetlana knows firsthand that most people succumb to cultural pressure to one degree or another (after all, we are told from all sides how important it is to be slim and attractive) and that it affects our sense of self and the desire to please ourselves and others.
I wonder how this culture contradicts the beliefs with which almost all of us were densely fed in childhood.
And the point is not only in the hospitality inherent in our people: grandparents, who survived the famine, naturally believed that the main thing was that the child was full.
Of course, our diet then – whether they forced us to eat or, on the contrary, took something away, criticizing our figure – also influenced our habits and our attitude towards ourselves and our own body.
Svetlana says: “Freud believed that oral injuries (such as lack of breastfeeding) lead to eating disorders, but this is debatable. After all, almost all people in one degree or another violated eating behavior.
The point, the presenter says, is different: in our inability to take care of ourselves, to listen to our feelings, to be aware of our own needs, to keep in touch with the body. And in order to learn this, you need to make one habit: before you start choosing or preparing food, ask yourself a few questions and answer them honestly.
Ask yourself when shopping for products:
- What kind of hunger am I experiencing (physical or emotional)? How can I quench it?
- How do I want to prepare this food for myself (if the hunger is emotional, then the food may not be physical)?
- How exactly do I want to eat (at what speed, in what environment)?
- How will I know that I am full?
- How can you help digest this food?
- What will I spend my energy on?
The first question is about hunger. It is obvious that it is different and that we eat not only for physical satiety. In short, there are three types of eating behavior:
- Restrictive – this category includes people who constantly limit themselves in food;
- Emotional – we are not physically hungry, but we want to relieve tension;
- External – we would be happy to have lunch with buckwheat, cottage cheese and vegetable salad, but the whole office goes to a pizzeria or a Japanese restaurant.
As for the latter, Svetlana is convinced that following not only a bad example, but also a good one will not give positive results: “If the principles of the diet are imposed from the outside, there will be no sense from it. Only the nutrition system that came from within, which we built ourselves, will be effective, carefully listening to our tastes and body reactions.
Our homework is to listen to ourselves and find the answer to the question: how exactly do I want to eat?
Svetlana asks us to eat meditatively. Not just chew and swallow mechanically, but approach this process consciously, thoughtfully, savor every bite, eat slowly, be able to stop and listen to your feelings: maybe I’m not hungry anymore? Answer your question and say “stop” in time. “The slower we eat,” the presenter explains, “the faster we are saturated with both food and taste.”
During the discussion, we share our gastronomic experiences, tell us what is important for us, what is not very important, what we have never thought about before (meditative nutrition).
Svetlana understands me and answers the question of how to deal with chocolate addiction: “There is nothing shameful in treating yourself like a child in moments of craving for chocolate and saying kindly: “Yes, I understand, you really want to, but … “. It’s also worth reminding yourself that there are other pleasures in life and ways to distract yourself from troubles. ”
After training
Day 5
I try not to have breakfast on the run with my phone in one hand and my diary in the other. Unusually, but today I finally sit myself on a chair at the table and slowly start eating porridge. On the fifth spoon, I understand that this is the most delicious buckwheat porridge in the world. After a couple more spoons, I feel that I am satisfied with both food and taste. After such a pleasure, chocolate seems not so attractive.
In the evening, however, I still attack the treasured tiles. When an empty wrapper remains in front of me, I remember that Svetlana taught me not just to communicate with myself, but to speak like a child: “I understand that you really want to, but you shouldn’t.”
Day 21
I began to meditatively eat and treat myself more kindly and acquired a new habit of responding to stress and simply enjoying less calories. Remembering Svetlana’s advice, I mentally made a list.
For example, you can grab not a milk bar with hazelnuts, but an interesting book. Instead of a box of chocolates, take skates and go to the skating rink. Go to bed (a radical method, I agree, but it also works). Well, or finish some nice important business.
About expert
Svetlana Kostina-Erykalova — psychologist-consultant.