In our society, the concepts of “woman” and “good housewife” have long become synonymous. However, there are many examples that refute the prevailing stereotype.
… From the very age when I began to realize that I was more or less an adult girl, I only heard from my father: “Nobody will marry you, because the mistress of you is useless”. From the words of the parent, I had to conclude that the ability to run a household is the main advantage of a woman. If we adhere to this logic, then dad made the best choice, because my mom put her life (and still does!) On organizing and maintaining an ideal life. In any physical condition, even in spite of poor health, mom cooks, washes, iron, cleans the apartment, and then barely crawls to the couch alive. In the words of the heroine of a popular Russian cartoon, she only has enough strength to watch TV. And since such a pastime never fascinated me, the passion for household chores with mother’s milk was not passed on to me. When I had my own money, and I was finally able to move out from my parents to a rented apartment, my happiness knew no bounds. From now on, I could not wash the dishes after myself immediately after a meal, if I did not want to, and not drive the washing machine about one towel of suspicious freshness.
Contrary to my father’s predictions, I got married, and rather quickly, although I did not set myself such a goal at all. My mismanagement was not a surprise for a loved one with whom we lived together for more than a year, and did not in any way affect his decision to propose to me. Obviously, because he doesn’t really care what kind of mistress I am. Neither he nor I believe that the guarantee of family happiness lies in the radiant cleanliness of the apartment and full of pots. In matters of everyday life, we are like-minded with him: it is better to go to a concert of our favorite group than to scrub the floors and rub silverware. By the way, the husband does not at all think that housekeeping is a woman’s prerogative. He himself is able to cook dinner and iron his shirt if I’m lazy or just want to do something else. But when I have a rush of culinary inspiration, I spoil him with such dishes – the Michelin restaurant will be jealous!
Rare visits from my parents bring some disharmony into my inner world. Dad looks at Mom expressively, pointing with his eyes at a dusty coffee table or stove with traces of yesterday’s cooking. Mom in this regard is less delicate (probably because she is very worried about my family well-being). She can easily say that shoes have filled the entire hallway, and in the refrigerator “a mouse has hung itself from hunger.” At first, these interventions in my way of life (naturally, with the best intentions!) Were terribly annoying. Now, on the contrary, they cause pity. Compared to mine, my mother’s life is incomparably more boring and monotonous, because homework is work without days off and holidays. I think it was her example that contributed to the fact that I do not consider impeccable housekeeping to be a mandatory attribute of a woman’s life.
Recently we got into a conversation with a colleague, a thirty-five-year-old mother of two children and an exemplary wife and hostess. She shared that she finally managed to realize her old dream and updated all household appliances. Like, we didn’t go on vacation, but made a dream kitchen. Listing the rich functionality and no less impressive prices of the new stove, oven, hood, dishwasher and other “home helpers” dear to her heart, she was clearly proud of herself. “And what, everything went out of order at once, what had to be changed?” I asked cautiously. And I heard an answer that shocked me: “Well, why? All the equipment was in working order, just not new. But don’t you understand that the kitchen is the face of a woman? ” To be honest – no, I don’t understand. The oven works – why change it? But the wardrobe of our “mother” is time to change a long time ago. Only she doesn’t need it: her face is her kitchen.
I do not want to be misunderstood and demonstrate complete disregard for the topic of everyday life. At the very least, unsanitary conditions and dirty linen should not be in a woman’s life, no matter how indifferent she may be to the role of a hostess. But to kill time to blow off every speck of dust from the furniture, wash every napkin and cook the first, second and compote every day – thank you! I have activities that are much more exciting, which allow me to feel much happier than my co-worker and my own mother. And I do not want to one day reach the heights of their homeliness.