Managers lie to subordinates when they need to avoid panic, parents lie to children to protect them from worries. On average, in 10 minutes of conversation, a person manages to lie three times. We can justify lying for the good, but sometimes lying can be destructive and harm other people. In such cases, the ability to recognize a liar comes in handy.
A liar is betrayed by words, voice, body and facial expressions. We cope with verbal signs of a lie based on the experience of communicating with people. You listen to what the interlocutor says, what words he uses and how his voice sounds. More difficult with non-verbal vocabulary. We will try to figure out the non-verbal signs of a lie.
invention of lies
The eyes are the mirror of the soul and the first source of non-verbal signals of a person. It is believed that if a person looks away during a conversation, he hides his true intentions or lies. This is not entirely true. At the end of the XNUMXth century, the American psychologist William James noticed that different people process information differently.
Imagine a group of people. You ask them to mentally remember a person they haven’t seen for a long time. Some will hear the voice first. Others will see the image. Still others will remember the emotions and sensations that they experienced when this person was around. James divided human mental images into auditory, visual and kinesthetic. He established a connection between mental images and eye movements.
Audials, those who have heard the voice, will look to the right or to the left. Visuals who have seen the image go up. Kinesthetics who have experienced emotions — down. After 100 years, the theory was finalized by practical psychologists. They added the knowledge that the right hemisphere of the brain is responsible for memories, the left — for construction. And they made a scheme — the keys of eye access (KGD).
In which direction the person looked during the conversation, he turned to that zone of thinking.
- Up and left up is the zone of visual recall. Previous visual experience, visual memory: the color of the car, the appearance of a colleague, the design of the office.
- To the right up is the visual design zone. Creation of new experience and mathematical calculation. Everything visually designed by a person at the moment: what the office will look like after renovation, a person after a haircut, how much money will be needed for a vacation.
- To the left is the zone of auditory recall. Sound memory: intonations, voices, sounds, music.
- To the right is the area of auditory construction. Creating a new sound experience, composing music. Everything that a person has not heard before, but can think of.
- Left down — internal dialogue. Speech control, pronunciation, self-talk.
- Down and right down — kinesthetic. Body memory, sensations, taste, smell, touch. Everything that is connected with sensations and experiences.
- Directly in front of you is a light trance. At this moment, at least two thought processes are involved in information processing: the person presented the image and heard the voice at the same time.
When a person invents, he constructs images and sounds. And then he decides in what expressions to present the fiction — he analyzes the construction of phrases.
You have been asked to come up with a story. Depending on whether you are auditory or visual, you will look to the right or right up, respectively. When the story is visually and auditory constructed, the gaze will fall to the left down into the zone of internal dialogue. There you will consider in what phrases to present the story you just invented.
Fiction is a lie. When you invent a lie, the eyes follow the same path. Let’s simplify: when a person lies, his eyes will definitely “twitch” towards your left eye. It seems that the person looked to the right or to the right up — he is lying.
The liar will try to control the gaze. But it is impossible to deceive thought processes
But everything is not so simple. Liars often look their interlocutors straight in the eye. They know that if they look away, they might not be believed. The liar will try to control the gaze. But it is impossible to deceive thought processes. The pupil will still barely move in the direction of the construction zone. It is difficult to notice this during a conversation: you are too concentrated on your own words and the interlocutor.
During interrogation by the security services, a conversation with a suspect or a witness is recorded on camera. This is not a movie fantasy. They make sure that after the conversation, the psychologist watches the video and evaluates the facial expressions, gestures and movements of the pupils in slow motion.
We do not carry a camera with us, much less poke it in the face of the interlocutor. You need to learn to catch the movements of the pupil during a conversation. Regular exercise will help.
Tip: ask a friend to tell a real story, but add false details. Record the conversation on camera and carefully study the video. Tell a friend when you think they lied. Review the record and draw your own conclusions. Do the same again and again with other interlocutors. There are no guarantees that the method will immediately help to recognize a liar, but you will definitely become more attentive to the facial expressions of the interlocutor.
The method does not work if a person has thought through the lie in advance
In nine out of ten cases, the method works. The exception is left-handers and retrained left-handers. They have the right hemisphere of the brain responsible for design, and the left — for memory. Therefore, the CGD zones in left-handers are mirrored or mixed up in places. It takes a long time to study the basic set of eye movements before you understand where these people are looking when they lie.
The method does not work if the person has thought through the lie in advance. Then it automatically enters the zone of visual or auditory memory, access keys change. But there is a trick — ask more clarifying questions. The liar didn’t think through all the answers. You will definitely ask the answer to which the liar will have to come up with on the go.
Considering only the position of the eyes is wrong. Pay attention to other non-verbal cues as well.
body reservations
There are countless books about gestures-markers of lies. The authors claim that there are gestures that indicate a lie. Here are six of the most common ones:
When a person lies, the nerve endings in the face and neck contract. Hence — scratching the ear, nose, neck, pulling the collar. The problem is that the presence of these gestures in the interlocutor is not the most reliable indicator of a lie.
Paul Ekman, an American psychologist, professor at the University of California and author of books on the psychology of lying, divides bodily movements into three types: manipulations, illustrations, and emblems.
Manipulation
Small motor actions, unconscious and uncontrolled. They help a person to concentrate on the main occupation. These are scratching, biting, pulling clothes, fidgeting, straightening hair. Ekman is sure that manipulation appears in a person in one case: if a person does not feel threatened.
A person manipulates when he ceases to be alert. The liar knows that he can be exposed. He is tense and concentrated, following every movement and cannot relax. Ekman believes that in such a tense situation, there is no place for manipulation.
Illustrations
Gestures that help give words the right color. Gestures help create a vivid picture of what is being described. First of all, a person notices words, the verbal component of speech. Therefore, when a person lies, he thinks about words, he has no time to think over gestures. The number of illustrations of speech in a liar decreases.
Emblems
The brightest of bodily markers of lies. Unlike illustrations, gestures-emblems are clear without words. A shrug is doubt, a nod of the head is agreement. There are many emblems, and they differ depending on which cultural group you belong to. Each country has a different set of emblems.
In Russia, a nod of the head means agreement, horizontal turns in different directions — denial. And in Bulgaria it’s the opposite: a nod is “no”, turns are “yes”. The person shows the emblems intentionally. He is consciously conveying a wordless message. But just as there are reservations in speech, so the body can “slip a slip”. This will reveal the liar.
Nine out of ten nurses in the second group made bodily reservations
Ekman conducted an experiment. Two groups of nurses were shown two different films. First, a good movie. The second is a nasty murder movie. Both groups had to convince the judges that they had seen a good movie.
Nine out of ten nurses in the second group made bodily reservations. Some awkwardly shrugged their shoulders, showing uncertainty. Others, answering in the affirmative to the question “Have you seen a good movie?”, Subtly shook their heads to the sides.
If the emblem is a slip and not an intentional gesture, it is not fully executed. One shoulder, an eyebrow or palms lying on your knees can rise. The meaning of incomplete emblems is the same — the speaker’s uncertainty about what was said.
Although emblems help to recognize lies, Ekman advises paying attention to a person’s emotions as well.
The emotions of a liar
When a person lies, he experiences shame, anger, or excessive joy of a successful deception. These emotions are reflected on the face. The main task of a liar is to hide true emotions. The correct way is to wear a mask. Another emotion becomes a mask.
Unlike emblems, which depend on cultural affiliation, human emotions are universal. All people outwardly sad, rejoice, empathize the same way. Ekman identifies seven basic emotions.
The smallest mimic markers of emotions cannot be faked
The marker of each emotion is facial expressions. When you feel fear, the eyebrows are raised, the lower eyelids are tense, the lips are slightly elongated. In anger, a person’s eyebrows are drawn together, his eyes are gleaming, and his lips are tightly compressed. Sadness is reflected on the face in the form of slightly lowered eyelids and corners of the mouth.
Contempt — the corner of the mouth rises on one side. Surprise — eyebrows raised, eyes wide open and mouth parted. Disgust — wrinkled expression and raised upper lip.
A person can fake surprise — raise his eyebrows, joy — smile, sadness — fold his eyebrows in a house. But the smallest mimic markers of emotions cannot be faked.
Let’s take a look at the most common emotion — happiness. The indicator of happiness is a smile. You are smiling. The mouth is extended to the ears, but the muscles around the eyes are relaxed. Mimic wrinkles near the eyes appeared because you smiled, your cheeks lifted. But there are too few wrinkles. When you are truly happy and smile sincerely, your muscles contract automatically. Man cannot control these contractions.
A truthful person experiences the same emotions as a liar during a conversation.
Emotions are not always an indicator of lies. A truthful person experiences the same emotions as a liar during a conversation. The liar is afraid: he will be caught. He puts on a mask of calmness. A truthful person is also afraid: he is afraid that he will be accused of what he did not do. And he puts on a mask of calmness.
The masks are the same, both experience emotions, but only one lies. Therefore, the emotional signs of a lie should be compared with the situation and context.
Tip: keep an eye on your interlocutor. If you see a person for the first time, do not start talking about business from the first minute. Make a joke, ask about something personal, talk about football. Pay close attention to how the face of the interlocutor changes. In a few minutes, you will see at least two emotions. When you start discussing business matters, it will be easier for you to read emotions: they are already familiar to you.