I convinced the maniac not to blow up the Silver Tower, but I can’t persuade my wife to leave the bedroom and drive my daughter away from the phone!
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If the conflict is generated by disagreements, a clash of points of view, then the conflict should be translated into civilized negotiations. If there is an intermediary who can help you, this is the best solution. Actually, the main hints in this article are for the intermediary, as a calm and wise person.
So the first thing is to calm down. Most conflicts are accompanied by strong negative emotions that interfere with reasonable analysis. Therefore, the very first step in almost any conflict is the ventilation of emotions. Need to calm down. Without this, there’s no way, so it doesn’t matter how, but it’s necessary to calm down. How? See Operational work with emotions in conflict
Watch the wording, speak carefully, best of all — as softly as possible. Remove conflictogens, reproaches and complaints, any hedgehog phrases. Phrases like: “You and I have never been able to agree before”, “Our relationship has reached an impasse”, “I’m tired” or “Do you remember how you promised last time — so what?” — the soul is not freed from emotions, but the emotions of the interlocutor are beaten. It really fuels the conflict. You need it?. Only the constructive helps out — the search for solutions is not the future.
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