Just four words: nobody thinks about you. Not because those around you hate you, and not because they are soulless egoists – we are all simply immersed in ourselves and our problems. That’s right, but it’s not always easy to believe it, right? Some practical advice on how to stop worrying about the opinions of others about your person.
How do you like this metaphor: any person is the main character of the series about his own life, and those around him are just random characters that you meet along the way?
Some may appear only once, others appear in the life of the hero from season to season, but what happens to them does not have much effect on the storyline of the main character. It’s not because they’re unimportant or insignificant, it’s just that they’re not in the spotlight, and that’s okay.
We are sure that everyone around thinks only about us, that the closest attention is directed to us, just because we consider ourselves the main characters, but for those around it is not so. And this is great news: it means that you can exhale, relax, make mistakes, sit in a puddle – by and large, no one cares. The oppression of public condemnation, as a rule, is just a horror story that our anxious brain gives out.
Well, how did you get better? If not, here are 11 more ideas on how to stop worrying about the opinions of others.
1. Focus on what really matters. Do what inspires you, gain experience, build deep connections with others. Be busy doing something worthwhile.
2. Expand your horizons. Dare, work harder, dream bigger. The more you are passionate about your life, the less time you will have left for fruitless reflections.
3. Ask others a direct question. If you want to know what they think of you, ask. Most likely, the reasons for unrest are far-fetched.
4. Stay in the moment. Worrying about what hasn’t happened yet, you live with worries about the future and deprive yourself of the present. Instead, try to be here and now, focus on what is happening to you and how you feel.
5. Figure out why you care at all. Most likely, you are afraid that if those around you judge you, you will lose something. What exactly? Can you really live without it? Not? So is it worth worrying then?
6. Stop waiting. Many of us care what others think of us, because we unconsciously expect that they will instruct us, admonish us, explain to us how to live in order not to make serious mistakes. It’s time to give up this illusion and take responsibility for your life.
7. Think back to your childhood. Children for the most part run like crazy, scream, squeal, play when and where they please, they are not at all used to restraining themselves and they absolutely do not care what adults think of them. And it would be nice to learn from them.
8. Put yourself in a bad light on purpose to make sure no one cares and everything will be fine in the end. Yes, it takes a lot of courage, but if you manage to embarrass yourself or make others laugh at you, you will see once and for all that there is nothing to worry about.
9. Relax. It is paradoxical, but true: it is in this state that we really become ourselves, and when we stop trying to win someone else’s sympathy, we eventually win it.
10. Surround yourself with people who love you unconditionally. And do not settle for a relationship, whether it be friendship, love or friendship, in which you need to prove something to someone.
11. Remember that you are already good enough. You deserve love and happiness simply because you are you, and you don’t need anyone’s approval or permission to do so. You are already enough. So stop trying to prove something to someone and jump above your head – just live and enjoy life!