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All the advice to reach an orgasm
The first piece of advice we could give you is not to think about orgasm while having sex with your partner. Yep, you’re here to have a good time first. Relax. If you put the pressure on yourself, you will only tense up. This is not a challenge, a contest or an obligation (eh no, you don’t have to cum!). Let go, trust your partner, your imagination and your instincts. Listen to your body, explore it, search, test.
Get to know your body
If you are new to your gender and have never paid special attention to your gender, have an ice cream and watch ! It is part of you and your beauty! Your hands and fingers are your allies to explore your body. But anything is possible, lying on your back, legs open, on your stomach, with a duvet, a cushion, in short, whatever you want. Once again, there is no such thing as normal in the field! Forget the prejudices, and try: geisha balls, vibrating ducks, very soft pebbles… They are tools of self-knowledge. They allow you to control and experience different kinds of enjoyment. A very useful knowledge for the couple, which will help you to better guide your companion in moments of intimacy.
Women often discover the existence of their perineum, this little-known muscle that supports the bladder, vagina and rectum, after their first childbirth, when they are forced to rehabilitate it! While it is always useful to strengthen it to develop its sensitivity. To find out if you are toned, take the “stop-pee” test. Go to the bathroom and contract your perineum to stop urination in progress. See if you get there and how many seconds you hold on. Do it only once! If you feel that you are not mastering it very well or that it is not very toned, you can consider doing small exercises: sets of 10 contractions, for example. But above all, train in real time, when you make love with your partner!
Another element of primary importance: the old separation between clitoral and vaginal has fizzled out! Clitoral orgasm is not a little girl’s pleasure. It is that of 100% of women! The clitoris is a very long organ (about 12 centimeters) which continues its ramifications under the skin inside the vagina. What is called internal or vaginal orgasm is nothing other than deep stimulation of the clitoris. Small vaginal contractions, clearly identifiable during orgasm, are repercussions caused by the clitoris when it is maximally stimulated. Hence the importance of taming and pampering this wonderful instrument of enjoyment.
It is not so much about actually finding it as it is about taking care of yourself. And again, get to know your body’s capacity for enjoyment, as long as you want to look into it. These capacities are multiple and often surprising. There is no miracle button to press for pleasure: even the clitoris (our best friend) requires subtle and prolonged stimulation. With regard to the G-spot, it is a sensitive “zone” which can provide women with a different pleasure, often more powerful and which is spread out over time than the “classic” orgasm. This point is located on the anterior surface of the vagina, on the border wall of the bladder. The G spot exists in all women. It must be stimulated long and gently to be sensitive. It is first the subject of a solo apprenticeship, then in pairs.
Get in condition to better abandon yourself
How to feel free in the arms of your sweetheart, how to allow yourself the abandonment necessary for the arrival of pleasure when you are obsessed by stubborn complexes? Try to be less demanding of yourself, don’t forget that the mirror is your enemy, your gaze on yourself will always be more cruel than that of others. Don’t follow fashion if it doesn’t look good on you. Find your style and showcase what you are proud of : an opulent chest, healthy skin, shiny hair, well-groomed hands, a graceful neck, long legs… You will be more sure of yourself to share a wonderful moment with your man. If you still feel embarrassed, focus on him, on what appeals to you, what troubles you about him. Fight against routine, put your senses on alert. Yes, winter drags on, you work, you take care of the children, and the house on top of that! Yes, you forget yourself and when you finally have a moment of your own, all you want is to curl up on the sofa with a good book. Instead, take a bubble bath with essential oils, and do yourself a little spa at home: hair removal, exfoliation, mask and all the hoopla. You relax, you take care of yourself, you reconnect with the reality of your body and you get in condition. As soon as your man looks attacking (let’s be honest: almost all the time), jump on him! Remember that the more we make love, the more we want to make love. It’s mathematical!
Be an actor of your sexuality
It sounds like the obvious, but it’s essential: to have an orgasm, you have to want it! Nothing like intense and prolonged excitement to achieve nirvana. If this excitement comes from concrete caresses, it is also the result of a personal erotic sensitivity. The most important thing is to know who you are. Your love stories, the evolution of your sexuality, your erotic imagination belong to you. You are the only one who knows what troubles you, what you like or not. If you’ve never really thought about it, now might be a good time. Books, movies, and especially practice can help you find out what appeals to you, what you like and what not. You MUST not try everything. On the other hand, don’t be afraid to try things and start over if it’s inconclusive the first time. Sexuality is also an apprenticeship. Like gastronomy, for example. It cannot be said enough: you are also responsible for your own enjoyment. Don’t rely solely on your partner to magically lead you to seventh heaven. You may be disappointed, especially if you don’t know each other well. So, you have to activate yourself a bit. If you don’t like your partner’s hugs, ask them to stop (yes, you don’t have to go through things that don’t suit you), make them understand what you like, don’t hesitate. not to talk to him, to show him. Men are very happy to have directions to please you, and if it’s done nicely, they never get upset. On the other hand, when you sense that “something” is going on, keep the momentum going. Let your friend know he’s on the right track. It’s up to you to encourage it as you want. Each has its own style! In short, you have to participate. If you let it happen, if you think of something else, no one will hide from you that it is a bad start.
Every woman has a favorite position in which she is sure to achieve orgasm. It all depends on his sensitivity. In general, the position of the rider (the woman above) is very successful. The clitoris is stimulated by gentle rubbing against the man’s pubis, and the breasts are accessible to caresses. Finally, the woman can control her movements, and the rise of her pleasure. Others prefer doggy style (the man behind the woman) for the deep penetration it allows. Anything is possible, but you won’t know until you’ve tried a number of positions and several times!