First, a slight deviation from the topic — about the principle of fining for non-compliance with the obligations assumed. I took this principle into service for a very long time, because. it is clear that he turns empty words and hopes into something more responsible. But the results he gave me are controversial. Starting from constant tension and fussiness (it’s more difficult to maintain a calm mood), ending with some small ideas to cheat and fool yourself (what if I lie down, write an SMS that I went to bed, and then I get up?) or even the controller (yes, it’s a shame, but as far as I know, such ideas do not only come to my mind). Later, I realized the weak link in this logic — in business, fines are paid to the other party, which is interested in the result, if the promise is not kept. If we talk specifically about self-commitment, then it is not entirely accurate to attribute someone else here, and complicate your life.
An important point. During these 5 years, many times I fell completely off my undertakings because at first something did not work out on time 1-2 times. Then it already seemed — ah, it’s still not “clean” anymore. Once I came up with a system that if I didn’t go to bed on time once, I lose 2 days of those already gained, and the path to 40 days of habit is delayed — this kind of motivation. The system also gave disastrous results in the form of senseless torture of the body for 70 days on end — sleep on time mixed with nonsense.
Decision.
The decision came not so long ago, and with great pleasure I find new applications for it in different areas of life. My only regret is that it took me so long to understand it. The basis is the principle of compensation. If I want to get up, for example, at 8 in the morning, but by chance (what if it’s really an important reason?) I got up at 9, then all I need is to write down in my plans out of habit that I have an hourly deviation. This means that tomorrow I have to get up an hour earlier, that is, at 7. Why did I remember the business analogy? Because the main thing is the result, and my main “controller” here is not another person, but my body. I think that if the body wakes up at 7 or 9, then it will perfectly understand that on average they want exactly 8 from it. Another plus is that I don’t tell myself “oh, I still didn’t go to bed / got up on time, now you can not go to bed yet for a long time». I know that for every minute of delay I will pay.
In fact, I had to apply the principle of compensation to the lights out once, and then for half an hour. In the morning — more often, 3 times in 40 days. And I understand that if I didn’t use it, each of these 3 times could knock me down from the beginning, as before.
I felt much more relaxed the whole time. Yes, I wanted to go to bed on time, but there was no feeling that “if anything” I would have to guess whether I was fooling myself or the controller. On the other hand, “if anything” (and accidentally oversleeping 1 time is very easy!) — I will not disrupt the whole undertaking. It will just be a deviation from the course, I will correct it the next day by deviating in the opposite direction.
It seems to be nothing complicated, but I am delighted with this decision. If you set a goal of 40 days for a new habit, you can see that you CAN afford some flexibility for this.
Above is the main point. There are a few less significant recommendations, however, the observance of which turned out to be mandatory for me.
- Alarm clock for half an hour (someone an hour) before lights out. A reminder that it’s time to wrap things up.
- No less important is the serious attitude to the alarm clock. Just an annoying call that needs to be turned off is one thing. Understanding what is important is another matter.
- Think carefully about the policy with friends and relatives, as well as any affairs that will throw off the plan. The principle of compensation leaves us some flexibility, however, we remember that for every hour it is not according to plan — you will have to pay, «there is no freebie.»
- More like a psychological thing. If someone from those around or close will make fun of anything — from lights out at 23 on Saturdays, to an alarm clock that reminds you of a dream. How will you relate to this fact, to this person, to your plans? Think in advance what to think and what to answer. At the same time, small conflicts, if people do not like your schedule in principle, are almost inevitable. Decide for yourself — do you really agree to go to them?
- I made myself a deadline in the morning — 8:10. In previous years, he insisted on 7. But this is not a well-thought-out moment — yes, I want to sleep 8 hours and it’s a pity to waste time on more. But a person with a broken schedule falls asleep far from immediately as he lies down (at 23). As a result, even raising yourself at 7, you accumulate more and more sleepiness day after day, things get up, your head does not work, you just want to sleep, the feeling of a breakthrough does not come. I set myself an edge — 8, but firstly, this is only an edge, if the body gets enough sleep, it can get up earlier. Secondly, if I see that it is necessary and does not come out spontaneously, and at 23 I start to fall asleep quickly, I can set myself morning at 7 as a new task. This will be easier, because now by 23 I really fall asleep.
An important point. I lead a lifestyle more of a freelancer than an employee. Many people around do not understand, but it is much more important for a freelancer to track sleep issues so as not to degrade! But it’s also more difficult. Therefore, my victory is more valuable — it’s one thing when there is no choice, and sleepy people trudge to work. If it were not for the boss, we would have slept for another 4 hours. Another thing is when you teach yourself to get up when you decide to do so yourself and there is usually no threat of being late somewhere. More difficult.
Nikolai Ivanovich recommended that I relax more often. I feel that the principle of compensation adds relaxation to life in itself. “It’s okay — if I fail, I’ll burst into tears, I won’t be nervous to lie or seriously spoil something from a mistake.”