It’s a paradox, but, being the undisputed leader of the list of male sexual fantasies, fellatio remains the most problematic type of contact for most women. Sex coach Ekaterina Lyubimova talks about the components of a perfect blowjob and the main obstacles on the way to the most desired sexual skill.
There is hardly a man in the world who would refuse a good blowjob. Meanwhile, many women are in no hurry to include this type of caress in the permanent «intimate menu». So what’s the deal? Having spent almost a thousand trainings only in the direction of oral sex, I can confidently say that I know all the enemies of my favorite male pleasure in person. The most important of these is fear.
- How sexually liberated are you?
- What sex shape are you in?
Most women refuse fellatio trite because that they are afraid to do something wrong, in particular, to injure a partner with their teeth, to cause him discomfort and pain. To be frank, this fear is not unfounded, because only about 10% of girls can boast of the ability to do a blowjob correctly. But it is also the easiest way to remove it — you just need to learn. Having studied the theory and tested their skills on a special simulator, women, as a rule, part with excitement and gain confidence in their actions. The “tooth phobia” also goes away, because with the correct execution of most blowjob techniques, the head basically sinks closer to the sky, where it is no longer possible to “bite” it.
The second truly massive problem is the gag reflex. It is curious that for many it does not occur at all at the stage of deep immersion, but in the region of the sky, which most often also signals an unwillingness or fear to engage in oral sex. Often it stretches from childhood and parental attitudes, when it was customary in the girl’s family to associate the genitals with something bad and dirty. Another considerable part of women is hostile to fellatio, perceiving it as a kind of violation of the boundaries of their personality. Finally, the gag reflex can also be associated with a real traumatic experience — for example, the girl was faced with the fact that the partner lost control of himself, entered too deeply and at the same time held her head, provoking an extremely unpleasant physiological reaction. However, regardless of the cause, the gag reflex can be successfully and fairly easily dealt with.
- Shouldn’t sex become a duty?
Another common fear among women is the need to swallow sperm. I must say, for many, this is really a difficult test, while most men insistently want to complete oral sex in this way. The thing is that the temperature difference between the oral cavity and air causes discomfort, reduces the sharpness of sensations, and in some cases it can even «roll back» orgasm. In addition, many men are excited by the very taboo of the idea of getting a release in the mouth of a partner.
Quite often, purely anatomical obstacles stand in the way of mutual pleasure from fellatio., for example, the discrepancy between the thickness of the penis and the ability to grab it with your mouth, not to mention such formats as a deep throat blowjob. In addition, women who rarely practice this type of sex may experience pain and swelling of the jaw muscles. In this case, practice also helps, because like other muscles of the body, they can be developed.
Surprisingly, in the XNUMXst century, insufficient partner hygiene remains among the serious enemies of blowjob. According to a survey conducted by our network, this problem is in second place on the list of the main male intimate mistakes, more than a third of girls suffer from it to one degree or another.
- Shouldn’t sex become a duty?
However, no matter what difficulty a modern woman faces in the field of oral sex, she has every opportunity to get rid of it — seek help from a psychologist, attend practical trainings and work out on a simulator, use special lubricants and other intimate means. But it is worth remembering that the absence of obvious problems does not mean the presence of skill. Without exaggeration, oral sex is a real art. It takes a lot of time, effort and practice to master it like a virtuoso, and short life hacks are out of place here as much as instructions like “5 rules to become a good pianist” are ridiculous. Nevertheless, it will be useful for all girls to know the basic principles that distinguish «just a blowjob» from a really good blowjob.
- Sex is better than masturbation
seductive image
In oral sex, the picture is fundamental. We can say that without it, there is no oral sex for a man. Therefore, the richer the visual range, the more pleasure you will bring to your partner. All the details are important here — the face, the look, the process of penetration of the penis into the mouth (in fact, at this moment the main attraction of the blowjob for the stronger sex) and, of course, we should not forget about the body. Men love exhibitionists — show yourself and what you do in detail. Choose poses so that the man has the maximum view (the best option is from under the partner’s hand). Do not hide your face behind your hair, try to demonstrate spectacular techniques and do not forget to periodically look a man in the eye, as if telling him with a look: “I like to do this.”
- «Men need sex more than women»
real excitement
Contrary to popular stereotype, it is really important for men that their woman enjoys it. And if we are talking about a blowjob, it is doubly important, because for him it means that the partner likes his penis, she enjoys its smell and taste, that there is complete intimacy and acceptance of each other between them. That is why a woman who gives a blowjob, as they say, “with a soul”, automatically becomes pleasant for the stronger sex, and the masters of oral sex remain forever in their hearts. Do not forget about the sound expression of pleasure. For some reason, many girls are embarrassed by smacking, squelching and other natural sounds, considering them to be too physiological and awkward. For men, on the contrary, this is the best soundtrack to oral sex.
- Blowjob: ideas and skills for more pleasure
Perfect Technique
Each blowjob technique (there are several dozen of them) has its own nuances. But there are also general principles, without which oral sex simply loses its meaning. The first and foremost rule is the presence of emphasis and resistance, similar to those that a man feels during vaginal sex. The lips should always tightly wrap around the penis, creating a gentle pressure, and downward movements should be with pressure. When performing a blowjob, it is important to constantly stimulate the head of the penis with the tongue, if possible, alternating caresses with deep immersion. You should always start at a slow pace, gradually increasing it, but not going too fast — this can cause discomfort and make you feel like you are in a hurry to finish. Even more offensive for men and a common habit of girls is to constantly wrap their hands around the penis, thereby insuring themselves against deep penetration. You need to get rid of it: in addition to visual interference, for a man this gesture means that his partner creates boundaries and does not enjoy oral sex.
- What are our sexual fantasies about?
Contact Us
Even having mastered the science of blowjob, do not forget about feedback. Of course, the ideal situation is when the man himself directly talks about his feelings. But such frankness can be expected from a few representatives of the stronger sex, so your own observation will help. For example, if during a blowjob your partner leans back and closes his eyes, while his pupils actively move under his eyelids, this is a sign that you should “pull up the equipment”: he fantasizes, because you did not give him the right picture.
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