My friend is illuminated steadily – once every two weeks. And it was not that the floor in the shower stall or some other similar opportunity cracked under her weight, but just somehow it became boring for her to approach the mirror. So, the monologue over which Wday.ru cried.
“Once again, it suddenly became clear that you need to lose weight. It illuminates me like that steadily about once every two weeks. Not that the floor in the shower stall or some other similar opportunity cracked under my weight, but it just became somehow boring to approach the mirror. I will come – and there She is. Who are you, damsel? From which of these Sultan’s harems did you bring your rich, Turkish delight bends to our land? The ones that you call “feminine” in a moment of self-deception? My weighty doe, why are you looking so sadly while chewing a cheburek? She got on the scales. They blinked, blinked and cut the whole truth. It turned out to be not so scary – even two kilos less than I expected. But, nevertheless, this is the weight of a woman who saws pictures of homemade baked goods on Instagram, and not phyto-cute selfies. Who’s guilty? Yes all. The whole world is against me. How well it all started once! And the boiled chicken breast has already ceased to seem like a dry blotter. And then my consciousness was overshadowed by the sight of “Koloboks with Cheese” sausages in the “Syty Batka” store.
She got on the scales. They blinked, blinked and cut the whole truth
“Whoever doesn’t like something in me, let him not look at me,” I said, but my family did not understand, they say: you chew first, otherwise you mumble something incomprehensible …
An eclipse happened again recently. The editorial door opened and our director entered, dressed like a dandy Londoner. And he has a cake in his hand. He entered, illuminating his path with this cake, like a light in the darkness. He put it on the table, and everyone was respectfully silent. Truffle cake. Solid and solemn, like an opera-ballet. Stands on the table and promises heaven.
“The cavalry guard’s century is not long …” – I thought, not taking my eyes off the cake. Realizing that I was already sinning, I had almost sinned against the figure, I quickly came up with an excuse for myself: you can’t refuse the cake that the leader brought! He will also suspect me of disloyalty. When the cake was opened, I temporarily lost consciousness. And when I woke up, it turned out that the whole diet to hell. A friend consoled me on the phone for a long time, telling in detail what kind of cellulite she had. After talking, they summed up the traditional conclusion: after all, we were and remain goddesses, driving mad bodies crazy with madness … But then I boiled: how long? Who was recently photographed in the Tretyakov Gallery near the portrait of his beloved Leo Tolstoy and did not upload this photo to the FB because it was just right to call the photo “Tolstaya and Tolstoy”?
And there was a gym! .. And there was a run. And again there were thoughts that sneakers are not needed, but sneakers, sneakers! And there were exercises with and without dumbbells. And the exercise “bike” lying on the mat. And the wall bars creaked rhythmically. And there were glances at the clock and faint-hearted thoughts that maybe that’s all, hare … And there was a bar, a bar, a bar to bloody devils in her eyes in a fit of remorse. First, on outstretched arms, then on the elbows, look forward, twist the pelvis. And the last one was a stretch, during which I entertain myself with fantasies that I am like the prima of the Bolshoi Theater … These graceful inclinations first to one, then to the other leg … All … Shavasana. “