Father and child are playing war games.
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My children were interesting to me even before birth, I prepared for their birth as seriously as possible. However, more often children under 3 years old are really not very interesting for men: men are interested in raising children, and not just raising them. Just messing around with children is not theirs, they are more often fascinated by the role of the Model and the Teacher. Yes, they help a little at this time, and if this is accompanied by reproaches, the young dad will continue to stay away from the child. But if a smart woman emphasizes that her husband does not take care of the child as often as she does, but is much wiser than her, knows how to stop children’s crying, whims and tantrums better than her, in this case the man will quickly want to engage in education. Women, be wise Suns!
If a husband does not want to raise his child, most often the reason is not in his attitude towards the child, but in his relationship with his wife. Darlings, are you able to be friends with your husbands? Do you often have interesting and warm conversations? Do you have a great relationship? I do not believe that with an excellent relationship, the husband does not want to take care of the child. He will still take your child away from you, because this is his favorite child.
The young dad should not be criticized, but supported!
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Unfortunately, the situation is often more difficult. As soon as a woman becomes pregnant, all her attention is now on herself and the unborn child, she is not up to a man. Especially when the child was born — the man aside. No sex, no respect, she was a mother, now she has become the Mother of God. He ceases to be the master in the family, now everything is subordinate to the child, and he is also criticized: “You don’t know how to deal with children at all! Well, how do you keep it? And then, when the man was removed, driven into a corner and criticized, they will demand from him with displeasure: “Go take care of the child.” Well, such an offended and offended man will not deal with a child. Of course, a serious and strong man simply will not allow such an attitude towards him, he will build a wife, and the right relationship, but there are not many such men. Therefore, no matter how difficult it is, the task of a woman is to take care not so much of a child as of a man. Only in this case, the man will begin to take care of the family. Establish and maintain relationships with your husband, emphasize more often that he is the head of the family. You can turn to him for help: “Listen, I’ll bring up a woman, and you need your son to have a man’s upbringing. Will you help me? Only a man can do this! I can’t do it without you … ”Yes, a man will be pleased to hear this, and in this case, the man will definitely begin to take care of his children.
Online broadcast by Dmitry Soroka «A woman through the eyes of a man.» Issue #1. Visiting Dmitry prof. N.I. Kozlov and his wife, psychologist Marina Smirnova.
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The child plays when he is interested. Men are also children, and for them to play with their children, we need to make it interesting for them. And you need to start with positive pictures. That is, when the husband comes home, you need to meet him not as usual with complaints about the child, but on the contrary — with a joyful and enthusiastic face. Tell him with a satisfied smile: “Sunny, look, and your son is all in you, he did so much today! Look what car he made out of plasticine, what castle he built out of cubes! We played football with the boys, you have no idea how fun it was! The father will like it, he will more often begin to join in the games with the child.
But there may be another reason why a man is not passionate about his child: sometimes he simply does not know what to do with him. In such a situation, stories will not help, what is needed here is not a story, but a demonstration. A man needs to be shown what games and how to play with a child: how to play soldiers, cars, balls. Oddly enough, often a woman knows better than men how to organize and run such games, and a man only needs to show it. Sometimes it’s worth asking him: “Tell me, are we playing this right here?”, As a rule, a man in this case will want to correct you in some way: great, you actually needed it.
And then, when there is a feeling that the husband already knows what to do with the child, you can use the following female trick, namely, whisper in the baby’s ear: “Go, ask dad to play with you, or let him read a book.” And when a child asks for a dad, it’s rare for a dad to not meet him halfway. All that is left for the wife in this case is to rejoice and say to her husband: “Lord, what a caring dad you are! How are you doing so wonderfully! What a thank you!”
Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov
Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.