The main
green crocodile
The green mother taught:
— Can you be a scientist
Designer or poet,
The main — be green!
Please remember this!
Belly hippo
The pot-bellied mother taught:
— Can you be an acrobat
Designer or poet,
The important thing is to be fluffy.
Happiness, son, in this!
And the gray mother-mouse
The mouse taught quietly:
— Can you be an engineer
scientist or poet
The main thing is to be gray
Small and invisible!
(Usachev)
And my mom taught me. The main thing is emotions. Fill your life with them. Follow your emotions. Trust them. Emotions are everything!
And I learned those lessons.
What was my surprise when I read in the book of N.I. Kozlova, that I am not my emotions… that one can learn to manage emotions…
And as it turns out, it’s true! )))
Years have passed since then. I have matured, I am friends with my emotions, I am guided by common sense. I work as a teacher in an elementary school and share useful and reasonable things with children and adults.
Three years ago, I recruited a new class of six-year-olds. Working with them has become a real test and a professional challenge.
Children behaved very emotionally, sobbed, shouted, threw textbooks and pencil cases, reacted disproportionately to the situation, endlessly clashed.
Of course, one could indulge in emotions with them. But I decided to act rather than react.
And so I teach children: you can become a scientist, a designer or a poet, the main thing is to turn on your brains;) Please remember this!
And I have good results.
For example, to solve situations with emotional storms, I adapted the wonderful technique of the Distance “Traffic Light of Emotions” for individual work with children and for work with the whole class.
The change was coming to an end. An angry Sasha burst into the classroom. Red. Suffocating. Screaming.
I honestly listen carefully to what he is trying to tell me, and because of his overwhelming emotions, I can’t understand anything.
It turned out that the four boys went to the toilet. Washed hands afterwards. And since there was nothing to wipe their hands with, they shook the water from their hands into the sink. The splashes hit Sasha and Nikita. By chance. Nikita laughed, wiped off the splashes and moved on. And Sasha exploded. The boys who sprayed apologized. But Sasha continued to boil and was not going to stop — he didn’t want to, he couldn’t, he didn’t know other options … ???
That’s when I remembered the «Traffic Light» technique, which I successfully apply for myself. She took out a picture of a traffic light from the table and hung it on the board, took out clothespins, handed it out to the children and said this introductory word:
– A traffic light is a metaphor for our communication:
- Green: minor troubles. If there is an intersection with a green traffic light ahead, drivers usually slow down anyway, at least just in case, but the car does not stop. Unpleasant, but this is not the end of life!
- Yellow: medium troubles. On yellow, the driver slows down and decides whether to drive or stop. These are troubles that really interfere, but you are able to cope with them and overcome them.
- Red: big trouble. At a red traffic light, the driver stops. These are very serious and real problems. You can even say “the end of the world” about them.
Now, with the help of the Traffic Light, we all, and I, together with you, will assess the situation that happened to Sasha and Nikita. Attach a clothespin to the traffic light circle that corresponds to the situation that we are analyzing and justify your choice.
The first to do this, I gave the opportunity to Sasha.
Sasha, very indignant, snorting, went to the blackboard, looked with displeasure at those who sprayed him, simply incinerated with his eyes, looking for support with my eyes. I was friendly, but kept neutral.
Sasha said categorically: Of course, this is horror and the end of the world!!! — and attached a clothespin to the red one.
After him, all the guys in the class came out in turn, expressed their opinion, argued it, and all, as one, attached a clothespin to the green one. And even Nikita, who was also sprayed. And I attached my clothespin to the green one. She looked kindly and inquiringly at Sasha, at the traffic light with clothespins, and again at Sasha, inviting her to evaluate the resulting picture.
Then I reminded Sasha: Do you remember the tragic accident when a girl from our school was hit by a car? What do you think, this situation — what traffic light circle?
Pause.
And the situation — «splashed by accident with water» … — I balanced with my palms, like scales.
Sasha hung up.
After a pause, he said that he wanted to change his clothespin to yellow. When he reached the traffic light, he changed the clothespin even to green.
I asked why Sasha changed his mind?
Sasha said that he heard the guys, saw a traffic light with clothespins, remembered the girl who was hit by a car, thought and understood everything.
Of course, I clarified that Sasha understood “everything”. And heard enough rational thoughts. And the main conclusion: “It was not worth it. It’s all nonsense. Next time I’ll do like Nikita. And in general, you need to think.
This practice became a lesson not only for Sasha, but also for the children of the whole class. I asked each student in the class what they learned from this situation for themselves personally.
The guys in my class really liked this technique. If they can’t cope with the situation on their own, they run to me for help and ask me to make a traffic light.
Since it is in demand with us (for now), it constantly hangs in a conspicuous place.
Of course, the problem of emotionality has not yet been fully resolved, but the seed of reason has been planted. And it gives hope. Water wears away the stone.
In my work, I often come across the fact that when getting into any slightly non-standard situation, the child incorrectly assesses its significance, and as a result, an emotional storm and conflict arises that the children themselves are not able to resolve and suffer from it.
They splashed water in the toilet! Those walking behind stepped on the heel when they went to the dining room !!! In a large crowd of children hooked on each other!!! And many other seemingly insignificant situations, but causing the reaction «Horror!!!», «End of the world!!!».
Often the point is that the child cannot understand: is it a trifle or not? Just out of luck? Or, really, “Wow!!!”? Or maybe just — «horror»? Or maybe it’s «nonsense»? Children in the experience do not have a suitable behavioral model.
The magnitude of what happened is easier to determine by comparison.
The child must be taught to recognize the true magnitude of what happened and to react accordingly.
For teachers, parents, psychologists — everyone who is faced with the problem of children’s inability to reasonably assess the situation, take control of emotions, choose the best way to respond, I recommend the Traffic Light technique. It helps children learn to be friends with their emotions and be guided by common sense.