Parents are trying to raise their baby to be successful. Sometimes they even try too hard. Maybe sometimes it is worth slowing down? A specialist who has spent his entire life with the children shared his opinion on the harmonious development of the child with the editorial staff of Woman’s Day.
Head of the children’s musical studio “Fidgets”
Sometimes it seems that there is no spontaneity left in our life. We plan life for a week, or even a month in advance. Something – for a year. If something gets out of this schedule, irritation rolls in: they say, again, not according to plan. But we are used to this. But when you look at children who live according to the same scenario, it becomes scary. A drama club, a circle based on a photo, and I also want to sing … It seems as if a child for parents is a kind of project. Which must certainly be successful. But is it right to plan a child’s life every second?
– The child must have personal time and personal space! Many parents think that if a child just sits and does nothing, he is wasting time. This is wrong. At this time, a serious thought process or processing of any previously received information is going on in the child’s head. We need to give the child time to just be alone … and what he will do at this time, let him choose for himself, ”Elena Pingjoyan is sure.
According to the artistic director of “Fidget”, it is better to try together with the child to draw up a daily routine and class schedule. But at the same time, not just pretend that you are listening to him, but really sincerely imbued with the opinion of the baby.
– For many children, the schedule is very disciplined, but you need to listen to the child’s opinion. And you need to subtly feel at what moment the child gets tired in order to give him a break in time, – says Elena Mikhailovna.
But how to understand if you have overloaded the child?
– If a child refuses to go to any lesson, this is already a signal that something has gone wrong. We need to understand, figure out what the matter is. What exactly does your child dislike: the teacher, the classes themselves. Or maybe he’s just tired and needs to rest. I repeat – a child needs free time, space for the development of self-awareness and for knowing oneself, – Elena Pingjoyan advises.
But maybe fanatical parents are right? And children who plow from dawn to dawn from infancy grow up more successful?
– Children who are accustomed to work, to go towards the set goal, of course, achieve a lot in life. In my opinion, a successful person is one who is happy to do what he loves that makes a profit. The task of the parent is to help the child find his destiny, choose a profession to his liking, – Elena Pidzhoyan is sure.
Here’s another pitfall for you – parents need to be very careful in helping the baby understand what his vocation is. It is important not to impose your interests on the child – otherwise, his real talent will not last long and stifle.
– Listen to the child, carefully observe what is interesting to him and what is not very much, – says Elena Mikhailovna.
And if a child does what he likes, that’s great. And do not be afraid that due to eternal employment you will distance from each other. On the contrary, you will miss each other, the more joyful your joint leisure will be.
– The main thing is to be interested in what the child is doing, to ask questions, to advise something. And in fact, it is very important for children when parents consult with them about their problems. And sometimes you can get useful advice through the mouth of a baby. It is important for the child to see and feel that you are interested in his life and his activities, – our expert concludes. – And to get bored is sometimes very useful.