Hello! Today we will talk about how to get rid of negative energy from other people. Since it often happens when a person “drains” his irritation and anger on those who just happened to be at hand. Who seems to be a safer object and, most likely, will not repulse unexpected aggression.
And we can become this random victim at any moment. It is not necessary to live with someone who is constantly dissatisfied and looking for those responsible for their troubles.
Sometimes it’s just worth walking calmly down the street or choosing fruits in the supermarket — and find yourself in the thick of things. More precisely, to receive a portion of negativity simply for the fact that there is or reminded someone, did something, or vice versa, did not do it.
So, having caught a dissatisfied and intent look on yourself in the morning, you can “fall out” into completely unnecessary and unpleasant experiences for the whole day. And that’s even better. Some get involved in a verbal skirmish, finally ruining the mood.
In general, be that as it may, it is very important to be able to step back. Therefore, let’s look at options for how you can protect yourself and your emotional state.
Methods
Wadding
A very interesting method that helps in quite tense moments. For example, when a conflict arose, and you understand that there is no strength to continue, but it does not work out to calm down.
Your interlocutor continues his speech, completely oblivious to the fact that you do not want to continue. Or if at work a colleague tediously and for a long time tells something, but for some reason it is impossible to stop the conversation. Then try to imagine how cotton comes out of his mouth.
So he opens it, and from there piece by piece, slowly and beautifully cotton wool falls out. The main thing is not to laugh at this moment, but to tune in to the process of contemplation.
The point is that you will shift your focus by pulling away emotionally so that you don’t feel upset, hurt or angry.
Fly
A bit like the previous version, only this time you should imagine that you are a fly that is currently sitting on the ceiling and watching the situation, which has deprived you of a sense of inner balance.
Being in the place of an outside observer, you will be able to realize your own limitations or opportunities. That is, how you get into such relationships, dialogues, how you react to them, try to get out … And this will allow you to advance in self-development, improving the quality of your life.
Recommendations
Boundaries
Learn to defend your personal space and boundaries. That is, for example, if you don’t like listening to heartbreaking stories for hours about how unfairly the world works, warn right away that you have limited time and the only thing you can help with is to set aside 10 minutes just to be around.
Don’t be afraid to say what you don’t like. You don’t have to put up with anything to avoid offending another person. He is not ashamed to burden you and cause inconvenience, why can’t you afford to speak freely about them?
Allowing others to do whatever they want, you simply cannot physically get rid of the negativity. If only because a lot of own irritation and other emotions that are completely unpleasant for living will be added.
In general, if you have difficulty protecting personal boundaries, use the recommendations that are listed in this article.
Distance
People who become unwell after contact are called toxic. You can learn more about them by clicking here. So, the best way to maintain peace of mind is to avoid meeting with them.
Because it will not work to reach out to their minds, on the contrary, they enjoy the realization that they caused inconvenience to someone, made them suffer, worry.
Try to minimize contact with such individuals.
It is not necessary to be rude, be polite, but pass by, saying that you are very busy, rush to important meetings and, in general, would be happy to talk, but not in the near future.
Projection
And remember that what other people think of you is mostly what they don’t recognize about themselves. A defense mechanism called projection kicks in. Therefore, if you were rude in the store, pushed and did not apologize — this is not your business. It happens that a person is very reminiscent of someone in appearance, character, tastes, preferences, and so on.
Why do feelings arise for him that are actually intended for the one he resembles. And, unfortunately, they are not always positive. Simply, for example, it is impossible for that person to express anger for some reason.
Let’s say he is dead or very aggressive, so it’s not at all safe to even just «open your mouth» in his presence. But someone in line at the store will quite pass for someone on whom you can take out your accumulated emotions and thoughts.
This knowledge will help you keep your self-esteem normal, so as not to reflect on what was said, not to believe offensive words, trying on the given characteristic to your personality. And to distinguish between where we are really talking about you, and where about completely different people.
Illusions
If you tend to rush to save everyone in need of help, then it is time to part with illusions. What is in your power to change something in the life of another person. Even if you really want to.
Until he himself realizes that it is necessary to make efforts and change his attitude to the situation, his style of behavior, and so on. Then all attempts to make him happy will be unsuccessful. And apart from disappointment, impotence or exhaustion, they will not bring you.
We are talking about cases when, for example, you have to listen to a friend’s complaints about her husband every day. What a «rag» or a tyrant he is. How little they pay at work and do not appreciate her talent. Or that the boss is unfair to a colleague. Everyone around is cheating and trying to get a benefit.
In general, you understand that a rescuer is a job that is paid. And if you already have your own job, completely unrelated to this profession, then all you can do is share your experience and listen. Just not every day is the same, wasting time.
Sport
If this happened and you “caught” the negative from another person, go in for sports. Active physical exercises will help to dump unnecessary energy. As long as it doesn’t harm your health.
Since unexpressed anger remains inside and destroys the body systems, causing various diseases, which are called psychosomatic. Since the reason for their appearance is the inability to express feelings, to give or receive them.
And to maintain balance and peace of mind, practice yoga. The most effective meditations that even a beginner can master can be found in this article.
Go for a walk in the park, after all. Reach out to a loved one or loved one for support. But in no case do not lie down in bed, feeling that you are «sausage».
Completion
Finally, I want to share recommendations on how to communicate with energy vampires. Indeed, despite attempts to limit the circle of people with whom one has to intersect, there is still a high probability of meeting such “bloodsuckers”.
Take care of yourself and be happy! Life is beautiful, so don’t waste it, enjoy every minute as much as possible!
The material was prepared by a psychologist, Gestalt therapist, Zhuravina Alina