Very often, the cause of a decrease in libido is mental depression, depression. You don’t want anything and that’s it. It won’t go away on its own. You will need to either contact a specialist, or independently do serious work on yourself.
To defeat depression, it is necessary first of all to put things in order in the perception of the micro-world around you and the processes taking place in it, of course, with the determination in all this of the predominance of positive aspects over negative ones. This often turns out to be a difficult task, especially if you do not know how to approach it. The main way in this case is to convince yourself that everything is fine with you. Of course, in order for such autosuggestion to lie firmly in the mind, it is necessary that it be thorough, and not from scratch. Substantial self-argument is required. And here are 12 + 1 tricks that will help you find these arguments for yourself. So:
1. We make a table of two columns. On the left we write the positive moments of our life, on the right – the negative ones. Of course, there is no need to write every little thing here, only big, important things. Next to them we put down the number of points from 1 to 100, in accordance with the impact on our lives. And then we sum up the scores and get the sum of the positive and negative characteristics of our life. It will most likely go something like this:
| Positive sides | Balls | Negative sides | Balls |
| I have a wife. Beautiful. I love her. | 100 | Chronic prostatitis | 70 |
| There is a child (several), smart handsome. Hooray! | 100 | Although there is an apartment, it is small, it is necessary to expand | 70 |
| I have an apartment (house). In general, you can live. | 80 | And the outstanding mortgage presses … | 80 |
| There is a car – and it’s good! | 50 | ||
| There is work. Although not all like it, but still there. | 60 | ||
| I do not suffer from severe forms of diseases and am not disabled. | 100 | ||
| No one in the family suffers from serious illnesses and is not disabled. | 100 | ||
| I am still relatively young, there is still a lot of interesting and important things ahead, everything can be fixed | 80 | ||
| I and my family have the prospect of increasing prosperity | 60 | ||
| Total: | 730 | 225 |
Everyone, of course, can have their own system of values, their own set of life aspects, and the scores may be different, but in general, the predominance of positive aspects over negative ones is visible – in this example, the scores are more than 3 times!
You always understand this, but when you see it so clearly, even this table alone already noticeably cheers you up. In fact, everything is fine! It is the quantitative assessment of your happiness in the balls that allows you to very quickly come to the creation of a fundamental basis for a good mood and overcoming oppressive experiences, dissatisfaction with yourself, your life and, in general, overcoming all depression. Print out your table, hang it in a prominent place at home and look at it often.
2. You need to learn to celebrate all the good things that happen to you. Very often the opposite is true. We focus on negative moments, incidents, news, but we do not notice good events, as it should be. It is not right! It is necessary to focus on the good, even in small things – The working day is over! Wonderful! I go home to my family. It’s cold outside, and the car started up – patted it on the hood, Eh! Let’s ride again, rattletrap. January 22 is winter, but for a whole month the day has been added, spring is coming! And so it is in everything. It is necessary to note separately the positive aspects. If you do this regularly, you yourself will not notice how soon you will begin to openly rejoice in all this.
3. But the negative should, on the contrary, be forgotten as soon as possible, passed through your fingers. Well, of course, big shocks and losses cannot be simply discarded – time heals here, but you definitely shouldn’t pay special attention to the little things. The wheel broke – nonsense. Everything is being done. Well, I danced around the car for half an hour – but I warmed up
Negative moments should be treated as the costs of our life. For example, when buying a car, we all know perfectly well that there will be trouble with its maintenance – it should be so. But these troubles are all insignificant. They will come and go. And so in everything, so with life itself – there will be troubles, but they should not determine your attitude to life. Each disorder leaves its mark on our psychological balance. And you need to make sure that this trace is minimal, but it is better to exclude it altogether. Otherwise, they accumulate and add up to a general lingering bad mood. The easiest way to give up and forget is to say to yourself: “In 5 years it won’t matter” – and no problem! And if you get hung up on all this, then there will be problems …
4. Very powerfully adds self-confidence to achieve goals. When you achieve something, it brings satisfaction with yourself. “Ay, yes, Pushkin! Ay, yes son of a bitch!” But a big goal cannot be achieved often. Therefore, along with large ones, you need to learn how to single out small and medium goals for yourself. For example, a small goal might be the completion of some work. They did the job – be happy for yourself, do not leave it unnoticed. You have not just done the work – you have achieved its goal! The average goal is something on the scale of a month. I want to lose 5 kg in a month. Lost weight – reached the goal. I want to pull myself up on the horizontal bar not 8, but XNUMX times. Pulled up – reached the goal. I reached the goal – I’m a man! I have everything on my shoulder. There is no need to talk about achieving a major goal. This is victory.
5. Illness. If you suffer from prostatitis for a long time, the potency is reduced, then it seems that this will never end. You can’t catch yourself on this thought, drive it away from you. On the contrary, one must think that although this infection is annoying, there is definitely a way out. You just haven’t found yours yet, but you will definitely find it. In this regard, you need to live with the expectation of future improvement. For it will surely come. This applies to any disease. But you also need to be treated.
6. Rejoice in all the good things that happen to loved ones. After all, they are part of your life, and if everything is in order with them, then this is good news for you.
7. In bed. Often failure plunges into despondency and a fear is developed to go to it the next time. Meanwhile, experiments with a successful outcome often do not leave a noticeable trace in the memory. But it needs to be the other way around. If it fails, chalk it up to some reason. It’s not about me, I’m just a little tired today. But if it was good, then vice versa – pay attention to it. Today is good, so next time I can do even better!
8. Work. She probably depresses 9 out of 10 people, to put it mildly. Especially if you have been working in this place for a long time. It is very easy to get out of this depression. Make the same table as in the first paragraph and evaluate its positive and negative points. You will see that there are many more positive ones. Quantification is the best argument. Of course, if there are more negative scores, then you should think about changing jobs …
9. You need to relax. But that doesn’t mean you have to drink. You need to be able to relax without alcohol. Sauna, massage, spa treatments, pleasant calm music, a good long sleep – this is real relaxation. She needs to be approached.
10. Go in for sports. Moreover, outdoor games, running not only increase muscle tone, but also lead to the production of endorphins – the main hormone of joy. Sport is everything!
11. You need to smile and joke more often. You smile – they also smile at you in return, and positive emotions are provided to you. Do not be shy to joke, do not withdraw into yourself, let the positive emotions out. This will cause a good mood in others, and it will inevitably reflect on you. And in itself, the fact that you can cheer others up will help increase self-confidence.
12. Go to bed in a good mood. Remember all the good things that happened during the day. And then you will wake up in a good mood.
12+1. This technique (rule) is not for everyone, but only for those who consider themselves a believer. Read Holy Scripture (Bible, Koran, etc.), whoever professes what religion – such Scripture and read. You do not need often, at least once a week one chapter. It gives a believer a lot of strength, brings peace of mind and peace. In addition, these are very wise books, there is a lot to learn.
It may seem that this is too many tricks and rules. Actually it is not. They do not need to be started all at once. Choose for yourself three that you can start doing right now, while the first technique (table of happiness) must be included in them. And then the gradual addition of other techniques to your life formula will not be difficult.
Take the path of cheerfulness, learn to love life! Then you will be able to overcome any depression, and confidence in your masculine strength will come as a natural supplement.