How to find your man, or whom to marry

How to find your person — the one or the one with whom you want to live for many years, wake up every morning, hold hands together and know that this is the closest person to you?

The first is to believe that such a person exists, that you need such a miracle and you should look for such a person. The second is to start an active search. The third is to look for the one you need, the right person for you. We’ll talk about this here.

Two female extremes in choosing a partner are money and feelings. On the one hand, starting from a certain amount of men’s income, women cease to worry about the age of a man and his character traits. In Japan, this is a man’s annual income of 10 million yen (450.000 USD per month), in Russia the amount is lower and depends on the region. The other extreme is feelings, namely falling in love, then fears “Oh, what if no one will take me at all!”.

It often seems that telling women that you need to turn on your head when you get married is an empty business. While you are talking, women listen, write everything down, and then either fall in love — they stop thinking, or they get married out of fear: because they are afraid that this man is her only opportunity, and the other will not take her. And when a woman is afraid, all reasonable considerations fly out of her head. Then she finds herself next to this strange male creature, which is in no way disposed to earn money. And now he thinks — what to do? Bought a fridge and it doesn’t work.

To look for the one you need and be able to understand whether this person is right for you or not, it is useful to use the following internal tools.

Filter «Magnet — Native — Rovnya — Necessary — Family». If you take care of yourself, you will look for the person who is right for you. You are drawn to a person, he is dear, he is your equal, you need him in life, he is family-oriented: we take it! As for falling in love, falling in love can both help and hinder you in building future relationships.

Model «Functions of husband and wife». If you care about who you are going to live with, you will think about how you fit him. Being a wife is a certain, difficult job. This means being able and being a girlfriend, mistress, housewife, business card, mother, assistant in her husband’s affairs … It is useful to think about all this.

Hints: how to find out who is next to you? Looking and guessing is important, but the most reliable test of your fantasies is the test of life. How to do it? How to find out who is next to you?

​​​​​​​​It is equally important to know what you will offer in return. Think about it: you have found your person, you have met him. And why should he be interested in you, what can you offer him in return? What are you worth in the marriage market?

If you live not only with feelings, if you know how to control yourself and be responsible for yourself, if, in addition to your needs, there are values ​​for you, another love is possible for you: love as a choice, obligation and dedication.

Today I teach people all the intricacies of relationships and put them in thinking within the framework of the University of Practical Psychology. On the one hand, this is a two-year professional training of coaches, consultants and trainers, on the other hand, it is two years of personal development and the acquisition of important psychological skills. I personally work there.

Test «I am the Sun»

And there is also my author’s Test «I am the Sun» — a convenient way for women to find out their prospects for family happiness. By answering simple questions, you will receive a description of your future chosen one, as well as recommendations on what you should pay attention to in order to make your personal life happier. Take the test…

Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov

Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.