As it was simple in childhood: shared a spatula, suggested the answer on the control, got into the same circle – and you are already friends. Over time, as we get older, things get more complicated. How to open up to another person? How to keep it in your life? Let’s figure it out together.
Sometimes it happens like this: we have a family, we have a job, and it seems that life has turned out well. But suddenly the moment we realize that we have no one to talk heart to heart with, no one to ask for advice and support, except for family members or colleagues. Why is that bad? They do not always share our interests and outlook on life, unlike friends.
We tell you how you can get them in adulthood, when school and university – the most convenient places for dating – are left behind.
- When planning a trip, you can register on forums and travel groups where people discuss trips to other cities and countries. Firstly, it is easier for people to get along when they are outside their usual circle, and secondly, a joint trip will give you a lot of joint memories that will be an extra reason for communication.
- Take a closer look at those with whom you often cross paths: neighbors, colleagues, acquaintances from the fitness club. To all those with whom you regularly greet and even chat. Don’t worry if you’ve never spoken to them before, you can always start a conversation with a simple “Hello” and try to strike up a conversation. Maybe you will find a lot in common.
- Through a hobby: Do something you enjoy, like watercolor painting, calligraphy, dancing, or running. So you will definitely find a person who shares your interests.
- Although we said that school and university were left behind, no one is stopping you from “refreshing” old friendships. Try to find old friends. Who knows, suddenly you will find unexpected common ground and start talking again!
- If you get a dog, you will not only get a four-legged friend, but you will also be able to meet other owners of four-legged friends on the playgrounds and in the park. After all, you will have so many topics for discussion – who educates, how they feed, how they heal …
- Smile! More often, brighter – to everyone who is nice to you. Smiling is a wonderful way to make friends because it shows that you are open to others.
How to save a friendship
You managed to make warm friendships, but then something changed. At first you call up and meet every day, after a while – only once a week, once a month. Perhaps you have moved, some of you have children. You got married, your girlfriend got divorced … In general, everyone has their own blockages of affairs and problems.
It all ends with the fact that you communicate only twice a year when you wish each other a happy birthday. How to fix the situation?
- Put friendship first. Yes, you have a lot of your own affairs, and you cannot, as in your youth, “hang out” with friends until the morning or chat on the phone for four hours in a row, discussing the boys. But try to set aside time to meet and chat with old friends.
- Speak from the bottom of your heart. Proximity, frankness, sincerity – there is no way in friendship without them. Hug your friends, confess your feelings to them, assure them that you will do everything to save your relationship. Just don’t forget to do it.
- Shorten your distance. Of course, it is much easier and more practical to communicate on social networks, but you need to call up your friends. Put their numbers on speed dial and call when there are free minutes. Arrived early for a business meeting? Are you waiting in line at the beauty salon? Walking with a child on the playground? Call a friend. Perhaps he now has a free minute to chat.
- Meet. If a friend lives in your city, invite him for coffee or a movie. If outside the city or in another city – go to visit or call to yourself. It is necessary to meet in person at least once or twice a year, but it is better, of course, more often.