Your child has been behaving differently for some time, but you don’t know why. He may be stressed. Because stress also exists in the youngest, it is up to us to know how to identify it in order to help them.

Stress in children

What can stress a child? He has no worries about work, housing or money… Yes, but. Children also have anxieties. This could range from a simple argument in the playground that will make him angry every time he goes back to school to the stress of seeing his parents separate when he sees them arguing. A move, a new birth in the family, a change of school or nursery, the departure of close friends … Seeing yourself stressed out can also affect it. The child absorbs your emotions. 

Causes of stress in children

To avoid certain unnecessary stress, it is possible to anticipate certain situations that are sources of anxiety for children. Do you know the acronym CINÉ? Each letter identifies a possible cause of stress in children. C: weak control of a situation. I: Unpredictability or unexpected situation. N: novelty, never experienced situation. É: ego threatened, the situation calls into question his capacities and his self-confidence. Each situation is not experienced in the same way from one child to another, sometimes even within the same family. It’s up to you to detect your child’s language. 

Manifestations of stress in children

There are different ways to spot stress in a child. Listen to him and observe him. The first sign is undoubtedly sudden change in behavior. A child who is always calm and becomes nervous and angry about not much can show stress. Conversely, a very active child who becomes silent and withdrawn is not good news and can express anguish in their own way. 

When the body expresses itself 

When a child does not manage to express his stress or to show it through his attitude, it is sometimes the body that takes over. Asthma attacks repeat or appear stronger? Eczema spreads like rarely? Stomach aches, diarrhea every morning? Does he start to pee again at night? Does he go to the bathroom every ten minutes? If the body speaks to you to help the child to confide his anxieties. Sometimes it is enough to talk about it, to put in words, for the stress to go away. Nothing worse than doubt or unclear situations for a child. 

Sleep disorders

Your child wakes up several times a night with nightmares, or has great difficulty falling asleep. It is possible that in the evening, the anxieties reappear. You can set up a ritual to appease him: sleeping, evening story, hugging moment … Thus, he will be reassured because there will be no unforeseen events and will end his day calmly. The evening can also be the time when you unravel the day in peace, with him at 100%, without doing anything else at the same time.

Should we consult? 

Before running to a psychologist, take a step back. Talk about your observations with those close to your child: the teacher, the nursery staff. Are his changes in behavior similar to school? If stomach aches break out on school mornings but never again on vacation, it is very likely that school is the problem. Talk to your child and teachers to find out what might be causing this anxiety. If the situation gets worse, talk to your GP or pediatrician who can guide you on the process to follow.

Read also: Back to school: beware of stress!

Maylis Choné