How order in the house helps to cope with anxiety

“Dealing with rubble in the house is not the same as doing other household chores,” says Anna, who has been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. “Sometimes I look at all this, and a real panic seizes me. I can’t get down to business, although this mess makes it literally hard for me to breathe. The world seems to be a chaotic place that I have no control over. And the mess is literally screaming from every corner of my apartment.”

What does science say about this? A 2009 study found that women who describe their home as “mess,” “mess,” or “chaos” have elevated levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which in turn isn’t good for their health. In another study conducted in 2016, it was found that the mess in the apartment often changes our perception of our own home in the direction of negative, and in general reduces life satisfaction.

At the same time, according to the psychotherapist and specialist in the organization of space Cindy Glovinsky, the mess can be both a cause and a consequence of psychological problems. Many of her clients who ran their homes have been diagnosed with depression, attention deficit disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Some have experienced grief or loss.

Why Clutter Causes Anxiety?

To begin with, the environment can greatly influence our feelings and behavior. Agree, at a concert or sporting event we feel different than in nature. According to clinical psychologist Gina Delucca, external factors can improve or worsen our mood, and at the same time, all people react to the same circumstances in different ways: for example, some feel uncomfortable in the crowd, others get a boost of energy.

It is the same with the mess at home: some have nothing against it, others who are prone to anxiety or hypersensitivity have a lower threshold for tolerance of chaos, and in an untidy room they even become physically ill.

“For many of us, home is a refuge, a place to hide from the clutter of the world around us and the ever-rushing tasks,” explains clinical social worker Kim Strong. – The disorder in the house quite naturally reminds us of the chaos of the world outside it and gives us back the unpleasant feeling of complete loss of control. Looking around, we understand how much has not been done, which means that we still have to do it. And the hands just drop.

On the other hand, for some, cleaning is a great way to take control of the situation into their own hands, distract from problems, switch attention from what is of great concern to routine activities, DeLucca recalls. Having put things in order, they feel satisfaction and realize that they are once again “at the helm” of their lives.

SOLO LIFE: HOW TO GET ORGANIZED (ONCE AND FOR ALL)

Living alone, it is easier to maintain a comfortable level of order for us and stick to a certain storage system – which means knowing exactly where this or that thing lies and not wasting time searching. How to achieve this?

Space organizers advise you to clean room by room in order. Or, if this seems like an impossible task, start with one thing – for example, with a closet with clothes.

1. Before you start, prepare a few packages. The first will go to waste items, the second – those that can be sent for recycling, the third – clothes that need to be washed or repaired, the fourth – those that can be donated, for example, to charity.
2. “Comb” each room corner by corner, moving on to the next only if you are really happy with the result.
3. If you have already put things in order, all you have to do is maintain it. To do this, bring each of the daily tasks to the end. Arriving at home and undressing, immediately hang street clothes in a closet or send them to the laundry; after opening the envelope with invoices, immediately pay them, and send the envelope to the trash can.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU SHARE AN APARTMENT WITH SOMEONE

Parents, children, partner, neighbors – in view of their presence, the task becomes more complicated, but does not become impossible.

To get started, talk to your household about what level of mess is acceptable for each of you. If your requirements for cleanliness are higher, explain that the mess is taking its toll on your mental health. Ask loved ones to share their expectations too. Glowinsky advises to approach this as a common task that you need to solve together, respecting each other.

What else can you do?

1. Ask for help and clearly explain what you need

It seems to you that you carry too much on yourself and simply do not have time to cope with all household duties? Do you have to constantly pick up something for a partner or children? Even if cleaning calms you, the realization that the cleanliness of the house depends solely on you can cause dissatisfaction and discomfort. If this is your case, it’s time to talk to the household.

“Ask those you share an apartment with to help you, but be as specific as possible,” recommends DeLucca. “Not all of us are in the habit of noticing the mess and taking on some household chores, so be prepared to politely and calmly remind them of this. If this is not done, the level of anxiety will only increase.”

If there is such a financial opportunity, invite a housekeeper or a cleaning company: this will save you time, effort and nerves.

2. If you can, keep at least one of your rooms in perfect order.

It can be anywhere in the house, even the bathroom. It can become for you an “island of purity” on which you can hide, even if chaos reigns in other corners of the house.

3. Teach kids how to clean

“Picking up after yourself toys at the end of the day and generally keeping your things in the nursery, and not throughout the apartment, is the responsibility of the child. True, you will have to accustom him to this, explains Glowinski. “Children do not learn this on their own, automatically, and besides, we often tend to overestimate the capabilities of the child. It will take a lot of effort, but the result is worth it.”

A good idea is to turn cleaning into a game or competition: set a timer and have the children put as many toys into the box as possible until the signal sounds. You will be surprised how much can be done in 60 seconds if the child is enthusiastic enough!

4. Accept that your home will never be as clean as you would like it to be.

Take a deep breath and admit that maybe an Instagrammable apartment that shines clean and has everything in its place is just not for you. At least for now. Try to come to terms with it.

“If the main source of disorder in the house is small children, often remind yourself: when they grow up, it will become easier,” Delucca admonishes. When we learn to let go of the situation and accept things as they are, the level of anxiety is significantly reduced. And this, you see, is our main task.”