If we want children to grow up not only successful, but also decent people, these qualities must be instilled from early childhood and shown by example. What to do? 9 tips from a child psychologist.
Prosocial behavior (benevolence, tolerance, willingness to help and cooperate) contributes to a prosperous life. Altruists have developed social interaction skills, they have positive self-esteem, they are well received by others, they usually do not have problems with behavior at school.
The ability to think and care for others is a key stage in human development, important for future academic and social success. The level of social skills in early childhood sets the entire trajectory for the further development of communication skills. The process is complex, because the child has to find a balance between their own needs and needs and the development of relationships with others.
Some interaction comes naturally, others need help to better navigate the social setting. Parents can help their child develop these skills through normal daily interactions.
Psychologist John Painpinto gives advice to parents who want to raise a child who knows how to care for and think about others:
1. Set clear rules and expectations. Rules deal with the consequences of certain behavior. It is necessary to explain why the rules of behavior in society are needed at all, and to show with examples what consequences misconduct leads to and why this happens.
Children are constantly watching you, and you have many opportunities to show them how to act.
2. Show that you are serious. Explain rules and expectations in a serious tone. With all your appearance, you must show him what behavior you expect. Reprimand for misconduct, too, express seriously, clearly and strictly.
3. Pay attention to the child’s prosocial behavior and praise him. Clear phrases like “You helped me a lot” or “You did a good job” let children know that their actions mean a lot. The approval of authoritative adults helps reinforce the behavior. Blame also helps prevent antisocial behavior. But consolidation takes time and persistence.
4. Lead by example. Follow the principles that you teach children, they are primarily guided by you — the adults who care for them. Imitation always gives better results than moralizing. Since caring for others is a voluntary matter, the child needs to constantly have examples of such behavior before his eyes so that he can learn its importance.
Children are constantly watching you, and you have many opportunities to show them how to act in different situations.
5. Be responsive and caring. Children will be much more willing to take care of others if they themselves have received sufficient care. A secure bond between parent and child helps develop prosocial behavior and empathy.
6. Take care of nature. By caring for the environment and animals, you teach children an important lesson. By picking up trash, tending your garden, caring for animals and their habitats, you are instilling important values. Thanks to this, they will learn to take care of others, to be grateful to life, to feel connected with nature.
Age-appropriate household chores help your child feel needed and important in the family
7. Read books about friendship and relationships with your children. At an early age, picture books can help you understand how beneficial prosocial behavior is.
8. Delegate household chores. Age-appropriate chores around the house help you feel needed and important in the family and bring you even closer together.
9. Protect your child from promoting violence. For young children, books, games, cartoons recommended specifically for this age are best suited for normal development. Nowadays, any child is literally surrounded by screens — TVs, computers, smartphones, so you need to select programs and games for him that emphasize the value of friendship, exploration of the world, and joint problem solving.