Contents
Politics is a very emotionally charged topic, especially lately. Talking about her can lead to quarrels, scandals and even breakups. Understanding how to prevent this
Why do we get so turned on during political disputes
Ideology is associated with our beliefs, ideas and moral attitudes, so it becomes part of the personality. Psychologist Christy Phillips explains: “When our political views are challenged, areas of the brain that are responsible for self-determination, dealing with threat, and emotions are activated. This creates the impression that the interlocutor is attacking the foundations of our identity.”
Polarization plays a role
According to opinion polls, there has recently been an active polarization of opinions. There are fewer and fewer centrists, and there are more radicals on both the right and left sides of the political spectrum. Because of this, a feeling of “our team” is formed.
Vile Wright, an American researcher and psychologist, explains: “Politics divides people into “yours” and “ours”. You are on this side, they are on that side, and there is nothing in between. And when this happens, when you perceive the interlocutor as a representative of another group, it becomes easier to devalue him. This is especially pronounced in intra-family disputes, as dissonance arises – a person is “one’s own” by blood, but “alien” ideologically.
How to Stop Worrying and Start Debating Politics
If you still understand that you cannot do without a dispute about politics, then the discussion should be correct and respectful. To do this, you should follow a number of tips.
Remember that you won’t change your opponent’s point of view
“If your goal is to change the mind of a person, you will be very disappointed,” Wright explains. Intra-group identity greatly interferes with the adaptation of critical information. The situation is similar to trying to convince a conspiracy theorist – in the end, you will only face resentment. Therefore, it makes no sense to harshly refute and criticize. It is better to come from support and the desire to understand. For example, you can try to find out how a person came to his ideas, what sources he relies on and why it is important for him. Ask open-ended questions, listen to alternative opinions, and don’t bristle in response to critical remarks.
Do not attack
Start the conversation with something you both agree on. Such intersections can be found in almost all ideologies. Then gradually move on to contradictions. Wright recommends avoiding “you-statements” such as “you just don’t get it” or “how can you even think that.” Such accusations will only put the person into “protective mode.” It’s better to use “I-statements” such as “I feel like we’re not listening to each other right now” or “I don’t like hearing such insulting remarks about my beliefs.”
stay calm
Remember that calmness is your shield. Once you lose it, you’ve lost. If you feel like you’re boiling over, try stepping away for a while, close your eyes, and take a few deep breaths. Moreover, if you understand that an emotional outburst is about to happen, try slowing down the pace of the discussion or changing the subject altogether.
Set boundaries and take breaks
In a dispute, as in life, boundaries are important. Before the discussion, discuss its limits: for example, words that should not be spoken, or topics that are better left untouched. Also, remember that life is not only defined by the conflict of ideologies. Do not forget to take a break from disputes – this will significantly improve your mental health.