How millennials are changing the concept of marriage

Millennials focus on work, personal needs and goals, and building a solid financial foundation to start a family. Moreover, they question the meaning of marriage as such. Unlike grandparents, they remain unmarried and unmarried three times more often. Gen Yers who don’t give up marriage but put it off until a later date do so for the following reasons:

• 29% feel they are not ready for marriage financially;
• 26% did not find the right person;
• 26% feel they are too young to settle down.

Such statistics point to a cultural shift. For the first time in history, people began to see marriage as an option rather than a necessity. This allows us to redefine the concept of marriage and approach it with more respect and awareness than ever before.

Put personal needs and values ​​first

Many millennials are strategic about career development and finances. They also seek to realize personal values, for example, in politics, religion or education.

“I’m postponing marriage to find my place in the world,” says Nekpen Oxuan, one of the founders of the women’s rights organization. She is 32 years old and plans to get married at a later age. Strives to find a person who will share her values ​​in relation to family, religion and politics. Meanwhile, she is trying to figure out how her entrepreneurial and financial goals might fit in with her future roles as mother and wife.

Changing women’s roles in society also affects later marriage. Today’s girls are eager to go to college, get a job and use other opportunities that were not available to previous generations.

Says psychologist and relationship expert Jennifer Rhodes: “I think millennials are putting off marriage because women now have more choices than they used to. They prefer to focus on work and use egg freezing and other technologies to buy time. Relationships become a luxury for them, and this makes them more selective in choosing a partner.

Now for women, emotional support from a man is more important than financial. A study by the Gottman Institute in the field of emotional intelligence has proven that men with higher emotional intelligence are more successful and happier in marriage. Being empathic and understanding, accepting the other person’s point of view, and letting your partner make decisions can be learned, these are acquired skills.

Questioning the institution of marriage

Some millennials are skeptical about the idea of ​​marriage. Perhaps they have witnessed their parents’ divorce or do not want to be bound by legal and economic obligations. According to Jennifer Rhodes, avoiding formal relationships is a way to cope with anxiety and the fear of making the wrong decision.

By postponing formal marriage, Gen Ys have the opportunity to go through several serious relationships before committing to a single partner. Thus, modern newlyweds begin to learn the wisdom of marriage from other starting positions than their parents, grandparents. They enter into marriage, well aware of what they need for happiness in a relationship, they want equality both in terms of work and household chores.

Historically, marriage has been a legal, economic, religious and social institution. People got married to consolidate property, get support from the spouse’s family, occupy a position in society, fulfill the religious or cultural requirements of the environment. Today’s young people don’t want to give in to that kind of pressure. Relationships are declared to be a private matter. If they create a family, then only on the basis of love and affection. The need for approval will not force them to marry.

Strive to know themselves

By postponing marriage to a later date, millennials gain more life experience. For example, professionally, they are trying to climb the corporate ladder and gain financial independence. They explore personal interests and values ​​and consider it an inalienable right.

Thanks to all this, millennials enter marriage as more mature individuals. This is often accompanied by additional benefits such as financial stability, professional success, emotional maturity, and a developed sense of self.

For Generation Y, this is the right choice. It is important for them to decide on life goals and values ​​​​before starting a family. First they get to know themselves, their desires and find ways to realize them. Then, on the basis of this solid foundation, they build relationships and raise children.

Millennials have changed not only the timing of marriage, but also its meaning in a person’s life. Although they do not create a family union longer than their parents and grandparents, in the end they gain valuable experience. This allows them to build stronger and more successful relationships based on understanding, empathy, solidarity with a partner, common values ​​and meanings.

Source: gottman.com