Contents
- What are the symptoms of a sex addict?
- Is one sexual partner enough for him, or will he cheat?
- How to understand that he just has a high sexual temperament?
- Is it worth trying to satisfy him if there is no desire to leave?
- He insistently suggests repeating scenes from porn films: how to relate to these fantasies?
- What to do if you suspect he has a sex addiction?
You are getting closer and ready to build a relationship, but his obsession with sex is starting to alarm. The question arises – did your beloved turn out to be a sex addict? And although such an addiction, at first glance, does not seem as dangerous as many other painful attachments, you are worried about how this will affect your union and whether it will cause betrayal.
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“I’m often asked about the line of demarcation that separates a partner’s healthy sexual activity from pathological addiction,” says sexologist and coach David Weigant. Is a future possible with such a man? Here are the most common questions and expert answers.
What are the symptoms of a sex addict?
There may be many red flags. The most obvious:
- He regularly watches porn, and in solitude, and this does not turn into a form of sexual foreplay with a partner.
- He masturbates even after having sex.
- He may react unexpectedly aggressively to your refusal to have sex, which does not fit with his usual demeanor (even if he apologizes for it later).
Is one sexual partner enough for him, or will he cheat?
“This question cannot be answered unambiguously, it all depends on the individual characteristics of the person,” says David Weigant. – One will look for new partners and sexual relations are possible for him with almost anyone who reciprocates. Physical attractiveness may not be of decisive importance. The other, on the contrary, is inclined to be faithful, but on the condition that a permanent partner is ready to satisfy his sexual appetite.
And yet, most addicts are unable to resist the painful passion for the continuous receipt of sexual discharge, and long-term stable relationships are possible only if a person turns to professional help. “The main problem you’re going to run into is a lack of trust,” says Weigant. “Very soon you will begin to suspect him of treason.”
How to understand that he just has a high sexual temperament?
“The answer lies in your love relationship with him,” the expert believes. Does he care about pleasing you first, or is his own satisfaction the priority? As a rule, sex addicts strive for the fastest possible discharge, they ignore the foreplay that a woman needs.
After that, they do not need much time to recover, and they are ready to continue the sexual intercourse according to the same scenario: reaching their own orgasm as quickly as possible. A partner with a high sexual temperament who loves you will first of all make sure that you enjoy this meeting.
Is it worth trying to satisfy him if there is no desire to leave?
If you start having sex against your will, out of fear of being rejected, he can blackmail you with this. It is important to be honest about the sexual scenario, the frequency of possible contacts, and if your needs are very different, and the partner insists on his desires, it is worth considering whether you need a person with whom you will not feel comfortable.
He insistently suggests repeating scenes from porn films: how to relate to these fantasies?
Sex addicts often want sex in “porn-like” scenarios. At the same time, they do not show their partner an emotional connection either before or after, and all unusual bed scenarios are designed to satisfy only their sexual desires. This naturally leaves the feeling that you are being used.
What to do if you suspect he has a sex addiction?
It is always worth remembering that you will not be able to fix it. Your friend needs professional help first of all. “The best thing you can do is to convince him to see a therapist as soon as possible, preferably one who specializes in this addiction profile,” says Weigant. “At the same time, it is important that the partner understands that he has a difficult and long work ahead of him, and he wants to change not only for you, but first of all for himself.”
Addiction does not leave a person instantly, however, with desire, patience and your support, he can learn to control his impulses, transform them into something healthier both for himself and for your relationship.