If plans to find a new job, break off a debilitating relationship, or start a business remain plans, it is worth taking more drastic measures. Coach Dmitry Esner explains how to dare to change in life with the least losses.
The most important question to ask yourself if you are on the threshold of a new life is: “Do I really want this?” It is necessary to very clearly separate your desires from desires imposed from outside. Do you really want to change jobs, get married, have a baby, or are you being pressured by loved ones and public opinion? As a rule, already at this stage you will be able to understand true desires. Motivation is often lacking precisely because, deep down, you don’t need change. If the desire to change something belongs to you, I recommend taking several actions to implement it.
Visualize
When you have decided on your true desires, you can move on to the practice of visualization. Make a list of what you would like to change. Get a higher position, get married? Imagine that the changes in your life have already happened, and ask yourself questions again. How will you feel? Are you risking something? How will the lives of loved ones change? Write down all the emotions and sensations that arise when you think about the fulfillment of desires.
Strength needs to be properly assessed.
You can also use the visualization board method. Take whatman paper and use clippings from magazines to make a collage that reflects your desires and aspirations. So you will understand what to strive for.
We set goals
The next step is to turn desires into goals. Take a list of what you want to change and set deadlines. Break each goal into several steps. For example, you want to get a promotion at work. What can you do now to achieve this? Talk to management, take on an important project that will showcase your talents. You may need to acquire additional skills. Write down a step-by-step plan, set the deadlines for the implementation of the plan. It is important to adequately assess your strengths. If you set a goal to lose 15 kg in a week, you will not achieve what you want.
We start to act
The word «procrastination» means putting off important and urgent things until later. Surely you are familiar with the situation when, instead of compiling an important report, you were sitting on social networks, walking with a dog and were ready for anything, just not to take up duties. Procrastination is dangerous because it reduces performance and leads to remorse, low self-esteem. To avoid these consequences, you make a step-by-step plan. And it turns out that it is not as difficult to start smaller tasks as it is to start global ones. For example, the goal of learning a foreign language can cause panic. But today you can start learning three foreign words a day.
Getting out of the comfort zone
To start a new life, you need to get out of the usual cycle of affairs. Most likely, the subconscious will sound the alarm, and the inner voice will try to lead you astray. This is a normal reaction of the psyche to change. Try to get out of your comfort zone gradually. Take a different route to work, order an unusual dish in a restaurant, spend the weekend alone if you are used to noisy companies. Even such, at first glance, minor changes will be an excellent springboard for jumping into a new life.