Interest in the new, the ability to notice changes and the ability to see the world from different angles — all this can make our life much better, Helen Langer, a social psychologist and author of the theory of mindfulness, is sure.
Psychologies: The main topic of our conversation will, of course, be mindfulness. Usually this term is translated as “fullness of mind”, “mindfulness”, “awareness”, that is, something akin to “consciousness” …1
Helen Langer: It’s really something close. However, the main thing about mindfulness is how easy it is to achieve this state. And the fact that almost all of us (and almost always) are thoughtless, inattentive. The way to live mindfully and consciously is so simple that it’s hard to believe. You just need to notice something new. When we notice something new, we begin to truly see the world around us. And it turns out not to be what we thought.
You, for example, came to the States, and everything here seems new and interesting to you. But in Russia, too, everything is new, everything is changing too, you just stopped looking closely! If you come to your home and try to find five changes there, it’s as exciting as traveling in a foreign country. How does such a phenomenal effect arise from such smallness? The trick is that as soon as you notice something new, you thereby find yourself in the present.
Inattention and stupidity are two different things. Many smart people are not very attentive
Self-help books tell us all the time: be here, live now. But we do not know that we are not here. Therefore, such advice is not feasible. But if we pay attention to the new, to the changes, we become more receptive to the context, to different views on the situation. It feels like the quintessence of involvement, like the fullness of presence. Sometimes we look at someone and think, “God, he really seems to enjoy what he’s doing. I wish I had that feeling too.» In fact, it is available to everyone, and this is the most beautiful thing.
How does your theory fit in with the Buddhist concept of mindfulness?
E. L.: I think these are two sides of the same coin. The purpose of meditation is to reach the fullness of consciousness that comes after meditation. As a result, we come almost to the same point, but I find myself there right away. My path is shorter.
How did the idea to study mindfulness come about?
E. L.: I’ve always noticed weird things. For example, when I moved from New York to Cambridge, where everyone seems to be very smart people, I saw scenes that are impossible in New York. Let’s say the bank closes in the afternoon, the parking lot becomes free, but it’s not being used. People just don’t think of it. Then it became clear to me that inattention and stupidity are two different things. Many smart people are not very attentive. In addition, our culture encourages thoughtlessness at every turn.
We are told that everything is obvious and known. School teaches you to memorize facts. But the facts are tied to the situation. Even in science, this is true: we conduct an experiment and say that if we reproduce such and such circumstances (which, of course, is impossible, because nothing repeats exactly), then with a high probability we will get such and such a result. But if we learn something, we stop noticing changes. We all need a powerful injection of uncertainty, we need to learn to consider uncertainty as our friend.
We are ashamed of our ignorance, we hide it from others. But ignorance is not a property of an individual, it is a universal phenomenon: I don’t know, you don’t know, nobody knows, because it’s impossible to know once and for all. Ignorance can be very pleasant, we can enjoy it. We will not complete the puzzle we have just completed, or read the detective when we already know how it ends. We want novelty… and then we run away from it. We want to have a choice, but there is a choice only where there is doubt. In this sense, we need to correct the situation.
Do you think inattention to life is a new phenomenon?
E. L.: To be honest, I don’t know. For example, when we use new technologies, we are rather thoughtless, we don’t really understand «how it works». We don’t know what exactly is going on, we just press one button, then another… But if we knew more, it would open up a lot of possibilities for creativity. You know, I think that in prehistoric times, cavemen were well aware that danger lay in wait for them at every step. So they were all right with attention.
The trick is that as soon as you notice something new, you thereby find yourself in the present.
I sometimes say jokingly that in our society a tall, handsome white man is probably thoughtless because he has nothing to fear, but a gay man in some cultures, where he strives not to impersonate anything, has to be as attentive as cavemen.
What are the main bonuses of awareness?
E. L.: It is life-giving in the broadest sense. And literally too: increased neural activity, which keeps us alive. When we say that mindfulness makes us healthier, happier, more empathetic, improves relationships, memory, creativity, reduces accidents, brings meaning to life, and so on, it’s hard to imagine anyone not wanting to be in this state. constantly. Mindfulness gives us the feeling that we are alive. So the positive effect is huge.
Your description reminded me of the «flow»: in it we also feel completeness, involvement, meaning2. Do you see something in common here?
E. L.: Interest Ask. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (Mr. «Flow») and I worked in parallel, and there is a certain similarity in our results. The main difference I see is that “flow” is a special state that is not available to everyone, or at least not always. I argue that everyone can (and should!) Be attentive and almost always3.
So if you are busy with something — just focus on this activity, be involved in what you are doing. And if you are inattentive and absent, this is because, as it seems to you, everything is already known in advance. But you want to be here and now, to notice what is happening around. To taste what you eat, to hear sounds, to smell… Any of the senses will do to develop mindfulness.
How to develop it?
E. L.: Very simple. Notice new things: smells, sounds, ideas. We often act as if everything happens all of a sudden. But it’s not. We just don’t notice the signals. Let’s say if you start the car and listen, you can hear an unusual engine noise. And if you are inattentive, you will not notice small differences from the usual sound. And when the motor breaks, it will require expensive repairs that could have been avoided.
Or another example: often we behave as if we gained 10 kg all of a sudden, overnight. But that doesn’t happen. If we don’t care, that’s one thing. But if we don’t want to gain weight, and yet we don’t change anything, we don’t “debug” anything in our lives … This is how most people behave — they don’t pay attention until serious consequences come.
And it’s the same with relationships: many do not notice that they are already at their last gasp until the partner says: “I’m leaving.” But no one leaves when everything is fine in a couple, right? So the beaten truth remains the truth: life is a series of moments. And if we are not present in these moments, then we are wasting our lives in vain.
Life is a series of moments. If we are not present in each of them, we will waste it in vain.
You argue that thoughtlessness is manifested in society as a whole. In particular, in the form of interethnic conflicts.
E. L.: Yes, nationalism is also a manifestation of inattention. When I proceed from the fact that some person is different, not the same as me, then I stop making subtle distinctions. Therefore, all «they» seem to have the same face. In fact, «they» are not at all the same, but in order to notice this, you need to pay attention to other people. One of our papers on this topic was titled «Reducing Prejudice by Increasing Discrimination.» This refers to discrimination as discrimination: the more we notice and distinguish, the better we understand that we, people of the same culture or nation, are also all different.
For example, we ask children in kindergarten to split into two groups. If we stop there, there will be a group of “us” and a group of “strangers”. But I say to them: now split up again, on a different basis. First it can be gender, then hair color, then eye color, and so on. We just keep dividing, and we already have ten different groups … Then we ask everyone: who is the same as you here? And the child, of course, replies: «We need to think» or «Depending on what.» Where are the others then? And there are no strangers.
Behavior can only be comprehended from within, from the point of view of the subject
In general, I believe that behavior can only be comprehended from within, from the point of view of the subject. This means that when we evaluate someone from the outside, we misunderstand them. Let’s say we see an impulsive person. We are trying to understand how he sees himself, what he wants. Aha, we say to ourselves, he probably wants to behave directly, spontaneously!
Spontaneity is good, but impulsiveness is rather bad. But there is always an opportunity to understand any ambiguous behavior in a positive way. With friends, and hopefully in most cases with ourselves, and with other members of «our» group, we perceive this behavior as immediacy. And «strangers» are easily branded as impulsive.
It seems to me that we are now experiencing the evolution of consciousness. And as humanity evolves, we will judge less and become more considerate. And it will be good, and it would be good if it happened sooner. Anyway, I’m working on it!
1 For more information about E. Langer’s theory, see: Yu. Dormashev, V. Romanov «Psychology of Attention» (Trivola, 1995).
2 Read more about the flow theory by M. Csikszentmihalyi.
3 E. Langer «Mindfulness» (Merloyd Lawrence, 1989). For this book, see: T. Butler-Bowdon, 50 Books and Great Ideas to Help You Change Your Life (Astrel, AST, 2006).