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– I was already on the oxygen in the ambulance. In the hospital, she was on a slope, and it was getting worse every day. I don’t remember the time just before intubation. It’s still a black hole for me – recalls Mr. Anton, who was under a respirator with COVID-19. He was in a coma for 17 days. Today, after many months of complications and convalescence, he encourages vaccinations. Sam just took the fourth dose. “I survived and I know what to fear,” he says.
- Mr. Anton is 70 years old. COVID-19 passed over a year and a half ago, but to this day it still suffers from the disease and suffers from long covid
- – I started telling my wife what and how to do it immediately. «You know, honey, just like I wrote in the emails and text messages, and we agreed in advance». Silence in the handset. After a while, her confused voice: “But we haven’t talked to each other for a long time, you were in a coma!”. Total panic … Everything that my brain had built fell apart like a house of cards in an instant – he recalls
- Vaccination was not yet widely available when he fell ill. He applied for the first dose immediately when his age group was “unlocked”. He also took the fourth dose a few days ago
- – I have a need to share my knowledge with those who want to know at least a little what their relatives felt, who did not wake up and left – he says, adding that after waking up until discharge in the intensive care unit (ICU), he did not see another awake. – There were only those who did not survive …
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«In a coma, you don’t lie down in a relaxed fashion»
It started as usual with covid: disbelief that it is a coronavirus, questions about how and from where, since hand hygiene and protection were taken very seriously, and there were no patients around many patients (on the day when he tested positive, there were no in Poland, less than 4 were recorded).
The symptoms were typical of a cold. Only the rate at which the infection progressed turned out to be dizzying. After just a few days, breathing problems began, headaches, muscle and joint pains became unbearable, the temperature rose significantly and was difficult to beat. Six days after confirming the infection, the saturation dropped to 76%.
Ambulance, oxygen, hospital. Far, 90 km from home, because in Warsaw, where Mr. Anton lives, there were no beds available for covid patients. His wife stayed at home, also sick.
– In the hospital, it was basically inclined, and it gets worse every day. I don’t even remember taking me out of the general room to hook me up to what it was called high-performance oxygen. It happened beyond my consciousness – he recalls.
After seven days of fighting pneumonia and the progressive degradation of the respiratory system, the doctors decided to put the patient into a pharmacological coma. The moment of connecting to a respirator is not in Mr. Anton’s memory.
– I don’t remember the time just before intubation. It’s still a black hole for me, some scraps of events. When you are in a coma, you don’t lie loose and don’t think about blue almonds. Coma is lack of awareness! It is a long dream made up of many short ones, one after the other, not always pleasant. I only remember some and not all of them. Maybe it’s better… – he wonders aloud.
“The psyche was in disarray”
There was an infection of the body under the respirator (sepsis), acute renal failure, circulatory problems, pressure raged. The situation was brought under control. After 17 days, Mr. Anton was awakened from his coma.
He did not recognize himself.
– Immediately after waking up, huge problems with the logical separation of reality from dreams and delusions … Memories of nightmares that come into being, waiting for death, and then the section … Subconsciously I remembered the voice of the hospital chaplain somewhere nearby. Deaths of other patients lying on adjacent beds. Slowly sifting dreams from reality. So far I can’t connect some things – he says.
The psyche was in disarray, but so was the body. – Total muscle atrophy, after a few days I still couldn’t sit on my bed by myself. I couldn’t speak and write. Daily washing lying down by medical staff. Care as for a newborn, only a 74-kg one. A dozen drips and medications daily. Sleepless nights, even after taking the pills, recurring nightmares – she lists.
Worst moment? The first phone call to my wife after partially regaining her voice.
– I started telling her what and how to do it immediately. «You know, honey, just like I wrote in the emails and text messages, and we agreed in advance». Silence in the handset. After a while, the dismayed voice of my wife: “But we haven’t talked to each other for a long time, you were in a coma!”. Total panic … Everything my brain had built fell apart like a house of cards in an instant – he admits.
The rest of the text below the video.
“I fought for every breath”
A month after being admitted to the ICU, Mr. Anton was sent to an isolation room at a cardiology ward. Relief, gratitude, but also a huge challenge, because you had to learn everything from scratch: breathing, eating, talking, moving, walking. – A short walk is like a marathon! – he recalls the time just before the discharge.
The return home turned out to be the beginning and the end. The end of the fight for life, the beginning of the fight for health. Even before covid, Mr. Anton was suffering from diabetes, coronary artery disease, hypertension, and ventricular tachycardia. Now there are more problems. The greatest – with breathing.
– My breathing was heard from a distance, I fought for every breath, I grunted and whistled – he recalls.
I ended up going back to the hospital. On May 26, seven weeks after his discharge from cardiology, he was sent to the operating theater. He was choking, the oxygen mask was not helping. It turned out to be internal pressure ulcers from endotracheal tubes, complications after intubation. A stent was temporarily inserted into the trachea so that Mr. Anton could breathe. Five days later, another operation, resection of a section of the trachea. Loss of voice, but at least normal breathing came back.
– I was lucky, the chin was not sewn to the chest, as is the standard. The first night I sat with my chin against my chest. The second night on the side with the chin still in the cage. From the third night on, sleeping on your side with your chin instinctively drawn to the cage. The hardest part was eating and drinking! Try this with the chin on the chest and add a sore throat and surgical sutures.
Pressure ulcers are a serious problem for patients immobilized due to disease. Pressure ulcers are better to be prevented than to cure whenever possible. A polyurethane anti-bedsore ring, resistant to intense and long-lasting loads, will be useful for this. You can buy it at Medonet Market.
Mr. Anton recovered his voice slowly, but he spoke with ease only in September. The taste and smell did not come back for a long time, but it was the least bothersome complication of COVID-19.
– Increased tinnitus that I have suffered from for years, dizziness and headaches, gastrointestinal reflux, a lump in the throat that makes swallowing difficult, sensitive lips from the inside that recur and feels like a burn from a hot drink, trouble sleeping, thinning hair , flaking of the skin between the eyebrows, at the nose, behind the ears and in the ears, onycholysis of the toenails, hyperesthesia of the right side of the craniofacial wounds after bedsores … – here Mr. Anton stops. The list is so long that it is impossible to list everything, not even remember it.
But he remembers the time of convalescence perfectly well. It was hard.
– I was afraid of being re-infected. It was a strong feeling. After covid and the rest, I have significantly limited my family and social life. In the first period, I even stopped meeting with others, and even now it is very limited. Meeting with the family, however, is about hugging, cuddling, children and so on. In addition, I was hesitant, I was ashamed, because while eating meals I had a lot of problems with swallowing, I was embarrassed by my way of eating – he admits.
“Anyone who survived this will understand it”
COVID-19 returned home in February, almost on the anniversary of the first infection. Mr. Anton’s wife fell ill. Bow? Huge. – Fear of recontamination remains with a severe course. I survived and I know what to fear … – explains.
The test was negative, however, until the very end of the quarantine. According to Mr. Anton, the vaccinations made the difference.
When he fell ill for the first time, the vaccination campaign was only just getting started. Only patients from the so-called group 0, most at risk of exposure to the coronavirus. But as soon as his yearbook was “unlocked”, he immediately signed up for a vaccination. He took two Pfizers, then attached himself to Moderna.
On July 22, the day after the Minister of Health, Adam Niedzielski, announced the expansion of the group of patients recommended for the fourth dose, he registered for the second booster. He took it a few days ago.
– 12 hours after admission, shoulder pain, then chills, then unpleasant moments with cramps in the legs and arms, and trismus. After a long while the cramps subsided, but the chills stayed until two in the morning. No fever, no headache. You could say that the whole person hurt me… Bad sleep from around 2.30 am to almost 7.00 am. In the morning, shoulder pain and general weakness with more than usual tinnitus. During the day I was back to normal, he reports, noting that even such vaccine symptoms are nothing compared to what he experienced last year.
– Someone who survived it will understand it, and for others it is only information about how it is under a respirator. Probably every sick person experiences it differently … I have not spoken to anyone who has survived the respirator and I do not know if I would like to recall and compare the experiences. I myself, after waking up until my discharge, did not see another awake in the intensive care unit. There were only those who did not survive … – he says.
– I have a need to share my knowledge with those who want to know at least a little what their relatives felt, who did not wake up and left – he adds.
But she has a bad experience sharing her experiences. In one of the social media groups where he told his story, a wave of hate spilled over him. Antivaccine had to use.
– Admitting to heavy covid was already a reason for hatred and insults. Banda and that’s it – he acknowledges, but since then he has been hiding his identity on the Internet. He prefers peace.
– COVID-19, or rather a respirator and a coma, changed my life in such a way that they showed me its fragility. The fact that a healthy, normal person can leave this world at any time. And I was not technically “prepared” for it, I had a lot of pending, disordered cases. My outlook on death has changed. Now I’m more afraid of dying than dying. COVID-19 is an extremely mean way of dying.
Have you been through COVID-19 and want to share your story with us? write on [email protected]!
We encourage you to listen to the latest episode of the RESET podcast. This time Joanna Kozłowska, author of the book High Sensitivity. A Guide for Those Who Feel Too Much »says that high sensitivity is not a disease or dysfunction – it’s just a set of characteristics that affect the way you perceive and perceive the world. What are the genetics of WWO? What are the perks of being highly sensitive? How to act with your high sensitivity? You will find out by listening to the latest episode of our podcast.