At 10-11 years old, boys (and a little less often girls) suddenly appear odd in their behavior: they refuse to undress on the beach, do not allow you to go to the bathroom and lock themselves in the room to change. With the fashion for bare bellies and slipping jeans, such behavior seems almost hypocritical. In fact, refusing to take off even your shirt on the beach is not just stubbornness.
Fear of exposure appears in some boys with the onset of adolescence — during the so-called early puberty — and is associated with changes in the perception of one’s own body. External changes are still little noticeable, but from the inside the body gives the child signals that can be perceived as danger signals. After all, it is still unclear: whether the threat comes from this suddenly “talking” body, or something threatens it from the outside.
In the life of girls 11-12 years old — the period of the onset of the first menstruation and the beginning of breast growth. Unlike boys, changes in their body are tangibly material and visible: the appearance of breasts is almost impossible to hide from prying eyes. At the age of 6-7, girls demanded bathing suits with bras from their parents — but it was a game that allowed them to identify themselves with some heroine of the animated series. Now the bra is more revealing than hiding part of the toilet. It only reinforces the feeling of embarrassment.
One way or another, the body of a teenager requires a new relationship. And new relationships are easiest to build on the principle of «by contradiction»: if it used to be so, now it will be the other way around. The changing body must be “appropriated” anew: it is mine, I manage it and no one else. Only “we and him” define the new boundaries of our autonomy. Well, besides, a dressed body seems more protected and attracts less attention to itself — both someone else’s and one’s own. So during this period, it is best not to pester the child with your «health» suggestions: in practice, they turn out to be traumatic.