“Parents should discuss the amount of pocket money with their children in advance and strictly observe this agreement,” advises psychologist Anna Fenko. “But don’t forget to review it from time to time.”
“Already on Thursday, your 11-year-old child is asking for an increase in the weekly amount that he managed to spend. Is it worth going to him? Pocket money is a kind of simulator. They are needed so that the child gradually masters financial relationships, learns to plan expenses, and prioritize. Agree with your son or daughter in advance how much cash he (she) will receive and what he will spend on. Younger students are impulsive, often succumb to momentary desires, and as a result, a weekly amount can be spent in one to three days. The most wrong thing in this case is to give more money “as an exception”. This will only reinforce in the child the feeling that the rules are not necessary to follow. If you feel that he is having a hard time resisting temptation, divide the weekly amount into two or three parts. Pay out on Monday, Wednesday and Saturday. Then double the amount issued on Monday, but warn that there will be no money on Wednesday. If the child manages short-term planning, you can return to weekly payments. Adolescents 15-16 years old have even more temptations. Sometimes they ask for money but refuse to say what they are going to spend it on. Remind the teenager of your agreements and offer to save money, or to earn for what he needs himself. Wanting to protect their children from the dangers associated with money, parents sometimes sharply increase their control: they demand a report on what they have spent, they sniff at clothes, trying to catch the smell of tobacco, look at their mobile phones. This behavior of adults only exacerbates the secrecy of a teenager. Ask yourself: Why is it important for you to know what your child spends money on? Will you be calmer if you find out that your son gave perfume to a classmate? Or did the daughter spend money on a blouse that you think is tasteless? Teenagers often refuse to explain their actions to us because they suspect that we will consider them stupid. In fact, pocket money is not travel expenses. Children have the right to dispose of them as they wish. Only in this way can they learn the value of things and learn to be responsible for their financial decisions.
* Anna Fenko – psychologist, author of the bestseller “People and Money. Essays on the psychology of consumption. Class, 2005.
About it
- “How to teach a child to handle money”; Joline Godfrey A fun and highly detailed step-by-step guide to financial parenting for kids and teens ages five to 18, with many recognizable examples and observations (Kind Book, 2006).