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😉 Greetings, dear reader! This story is about how a young woman, once betraying her husband, immediately became pregnant. Remorse and the thought that she would somehow have to live with this did not give her peace of mind even after the birth of the baby:
“It would seem that I have absolutely everything I need to be happy. However, a painful secret lies like a stone on the soul …
Vanechka
The mother-in-law chirped, bending over Vanyushka’s bed:
– Look what he made a face! Well, the spitting image of Romchik as a child. Ooh, my bead, but a nose, a nose! Romchik, look, Vanyushka has your profile, the same intelligent! My sweetheart!
Vanka busily gnawed at his fist, graciously allowing his grandmother to be touched by his resemblance to his father. With your father? I glanced sideways at my husband, who was filled with pride. It seemed to me that I was going to lose my mind. I wanted to run out of the apartment and never come back.
Where do you get the strength to listen to all these shushi-pushi? Play a cute smile? To hide what is eating, takes away strength and the ability to enjoy life?
Even when my mother-in-law left, I did not feel relief.
– How he eats, – the husband sat down next to me when I was feeding the baby.
“He could probably eat around the clock,” she muttered in irritation.
Romka looked at me attentively and asked softly:
– Is something wrong again? You are tired? Feeling bad?
“Yes! Badly! – I wanted to scream. – I deceived you! ” Let it hit, let it kicked it out, let it … No! I love him, and Vanka is our son, ours!
– No, everything is fine, – I could hardly hold back the tears that had come.
– These hormones are a terrible thing, – the husband sighed and sat down at the computer.
Hormones … This was for him the only explanation for my strange behavior, my irritation. However, I myself gave him such an explanation. He doesn’t have to know the true cause of my depression. Should never and for nothing …
What a woman lacks
That night, like many previous ones, I could not sleep for a long time. I lay with my eyes closed, trying to drive away bad thoughts, but they stubbornly crawled into my head, not letting go of me for a minute, obsessively scrolling the “film” of the last two years in my mind’s eye …
It all started when Roman received a long-awaited promotion and became a director of the company. Suddenly everything changed. Our financial situation has improved significantly, but the relationship between us began to deteriorate.
The work absorbed her husband completely, he became a guest in his own house. I didn’t even know what responsibilities were taking up all his time, but Roman completely stopped talking to me.
Long walks along the night streets, debates about new books and films are a thing of the past. He came late at night, took a shower, had dinner and went to bed. And if I didn’t go to sleep, then I was sitting up late at the computer, and I fell asleep first in vain expectations.
Fragrant, in a sexy nightgown and … alone. I cried and was terribly angry.
“I’m doing all this for you,” my husband said when I let him know that I felt rejected. – So that you are happy, so that you do not deny yourself anything.
Of course, I had everything. I went to work only in order not to sit all day alone at home. Her husband’s salary was enough not only to pay off loans, but also for a beautiful life.
I bought clothes in boutiques, visited expensive beauty salons. But the more I took care of myself, the more it annoyed me to feel that no one needed all this. Roma was all at work …
Our nights have become like the nights of a married couple with thirty years of experience. Everything happened with the lights off, somehow, just as soon as possible …
– Please understand me, – Romka said, – tomorrow is an important meeting, I need to sleep well.
“A woman loves with her ears”
Meetings, meetings, reports. A thousand things that are more important than our personal life. I blamed my husband for being cold, he blamed me for lack of understanding and exaggerated demands. We fought all the time.
And it was then that Igor appeared. Roman went on another business trip. I went to a friend’s birthday party alone. Igor invited me to dance. Nice, charming, helpful.
I liked that he became interested in me, looked after the table – put all sorts of delicacies on my plate, refilled my glass with wine, invited me to dance … The interest of a stranger flattered my pride. And with each sip of wine more and more …
“Looks like I drank too much,” she smiled apologetically as she stepped on his foot during the dance.
“Don’t worry,” he hugged me tighter around the waist. – And smile more often, you have such a beautiful smile …
How long have I not heard compliments from men! I even managed to forget how pleasant it is. Roman no longer admired my smile or anything else. Thanks to Igor, I felt like the most beautiful woman in the world, and at the same time I was seized by a strange melancholy.
– You are all trembling … – Igor whispered gently in my ear.
The scent of his cologne enveloped me. So masculine, sexy, heady …
– I have to go home, – I tried to wriggle out of his embrace.
“Now I’ll call a taxi,” the young man expressed his readiness to help and immediately took out his mobile phone.
“Here and now”
I don’t understand how this could have happened. I only remember that I very much desired this myself. Of course, he got into a taxi with me and immediately began to shower me with kisses. Of course, I understood that I shouldn’t give in to him, but I didn’t have the strength to resist.
I wanted to feel at least for a moment what I had missed for so long. Remember how it happens. We went to him and made love to unconsciousness.
In the morning I slipped away. At home I stood under the shower for a long time and with closed eyes recalled pictures from the previous night. To remember every little thing, every gesture, every word – because I knew that it would never happen again.
I loved my husband and wanted to be only with him. Igor was a momentary weakness, an outlet, an adventure … He just gave me what I needed. I told him about it that night, and he understood everything.
“The only thing that matters is what is in this moment, here and now,” he said.
When Roman appeared at home on Sunday evening, I greeted him with a festive candlelit dinner. My euphoria, probably, was transmitted to him, because after dinner he was gentle, sensitive. I gladly responded to his caresses, and only when I fell asleep, burying myself in his shoulder, did my remorse awaken.
After all, I cheated on my husband! Nothing could justify this fact. From this thought it became incredibly painful and scary.
“I love you,” Romka said suddenly, and I felt even worse.
Congratulations!
The days passed, life went on as before. I went to work, cooked Roman dinners, and he ate them without appetite, because he was too tired at work. I almost forgot about Igor. Only sometimes, before going to bed, I remembered that night. His look, his touch. Now I couldn’t believe it myself – did I really dare to do something to the dachshund?
But this was an indisputable fact. Three weeks later, this fact reached me with even greater force. I was sitting in the library with a calendar in my hands, trying to reconstruct the course of events. Menses were already eight days late …
“Maybe it’s because of stress or hypothermia, maybe…” I tried not to panic. However, the next day, when Roman left for work, she ran to the pharmacy for a test. Then she sat for a long time on the edge of the bathtub, clenching her fists to pain. Two stripes appeared immediately.
– Accept my congratulations, you are pregnant! – the doctor smiled. – Sixth week. I will now write you directions for tests and bypassing specialists …
Taking a stack of papers, I silently left the office. “Lord, this is impossible …”. Tears ran down my cheeks. What to do?
– Take, please … – Someone touched my shoulder. – You left … – the nurse handed me a scarf forgotten in the office and smiled: – Do not worry, everything will work out. After all, children are joy and God’s blessing!
I walked down the street, shedding tears and not knowing what to do. “Why, among the millions of women who have romance, did this happen to me?” – asked myself meaningless questions. But it happened. Punishment for “betraying once”.
I, a married woman, carried a child in me who could be the child of my husband or the child of a man about whom I, in essence, knew nothing. So what? What now?!
Baby is a blessing
I seized on this thought to drive off the second – about abortion. After all, it was my child. The little one I’ve dreamed of for a long time. How can you get rid of a baby? I bear and give birth to a child! But I had no idea what to do.
Tell the truth to my husband? So what is next? He will not understand, will not forgive. And how can you even understand that ?! A woman who does not know who is the father of her child! That’s a pretty good thing … Ask Igor to take an analysis to exclude or confirm paternity? But I absolutely did not want to devote a stranger to my problems …
– Masha, what’s wrong with you? – for painful thoughts, I did not even hear how Roman returned from work. There was an unfeigned concern and concern on my husband’s face that I rarely saw.
I clung to him, because always, when it was bad, I wanted to hide on his chest. Only recently, when I needed him especially, he simply was not at home. But now he was …
– You came earlier than usual …
– Of course, because today is a special day. Do not you remember? – with a gesture of a magician, he took out a bouquet of red roses from behind.
“Today is our third wedding anniversary,” I gasped and burst into bitter sobs.
– What’s the matter? – Roman got scared.
To tell? Lie? What I did was also his fault, but did he deserve it?
“I’m pregnant and…” I hesitated for a second, but Roman had already grabbed me and swung me in his arms. And I lost heart, I didn’t say …
– So, I am the happiest person on this earth! – whispered her husband in a trembling voice.
For the first time I saw tears in his eyes.
And suddenly one day …
The second time it happened was when Vanya was born. Romka, of course, is convinced that this is his child. Hope this is the case. And now I have to learn to live with it, although God alone knows how difficult it is … What if one day, at that friend of mine, I will meet Igor again? ”
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