Contents
- Going to bed on the first night: what men say to each other
- First time on the first date, pros and cons?
- The arguments for and against going to bed the first night
- Sex on the first date: 6 arguments for and against
- There are several reasons why sex on a first date is not just a good idea, but a really great idea:
- Why you shouldn’t have sex on the first date:
- So what is the final conclusion about sex after the first date?
On the occasion of the first time or during an umpteenth sexual relationship, should you go to bed the first night? This question arises from the emotions of adolescence, and remains in the minds of women throughout their lives. Whether or not having sex on the first night is a question that only concerns very few men, conversely.
Going to bed on the first night: what men say to each other
Few men refuse to have sex on the first night – although it does exist. Yet conversely, many are the women who are content to seduce, flirt and end up kissing their one night conquest – possibly indulging in some foreplay – without going any further and waiting for a second date. Why such reluctance?
No doubt because the woman who goes to bed the first night is considered an easy girl – even a nymphomaniac – while her male counterpart, for her part, passes for an irresistible seducer. In a society where sexual mores are free, is this observation still relevant? Go to bed the first night, what do men think?
Going to bed the first night is crippling for a long-term relationship.
The prejudices of another era still apply to some men: a woman who sleeps on the first date is, if not a girl with light morals, an easy girl, a nymphomaniac or any other term connoted vulgar . Thus, if these same men do not hesitate to consume on the occasion of a first meeting, they only retain an image of their partner as a “one night stand” and are not inclined to repeat the relationship under whatever forms.
If she sleeps on their first “date”, he imagines that she does the same systematically.
Beyond the bad image that can send the woman who decides to have sex with a stranger, her liberated behavior suggests, in the sense of many men, habits that they see with a bad eye. Going to bed the first night would imply that the woman has a very dense sexual past. So what ? So man, marked by an ancestral ideology, desires a life partner whose previous experience is limited.
The liberated woman attracts.
Argument for going to bed the first night, on the contrary, the liberated behavior of the lover who does not hesitate to give in to her desire for sex whatever the degree of intimacy she maintains with the man may please. She gives the impression of being free, and therefore daring and experienced. Under these conditions, the man expects an explosive sexual frenzy for maximum pleasure: this promise constitutes an important attraction.
When to go to bed on the first night leads to a lasting relationship.
Lovers can communicate in bed, but intercourse does not silence them. In this context, partners for one night have the opportunity to reveal more than just their anatomy or their sexual prowess. And it often happens that an unknown lover for a night becomes a life partner.
First time on the first date, pros and cons?
Going to bed the first night when the experience of sex has already been acquired does not have the same consequences as during the first time. When partners are experienced enough to know each other and know how to achieve pleasure, going to bed the first night can be pleasurable and lead to physical enjoyment. On the other hand, a woman’s first time can be painful for some. To the extent, moreover, that the woman is penetrated during sexual intercourse, she is less in control than the man. For these reasons, the first time of a woman requires for the majority a climate of confidence which prevents to do it with a stranger. For some, however, sleeping for the first time with a stranger, outside of any romantic relationship, seems preferable: the woman who considers sex as much for physical pleasure as as the realization of a love wishes to go through this stage in a completely disconnected way. with any touch of romanticism.
The arguments for and against going to bed the first night
Why give in to temptation on the first date? To express your freedom to act, to satisfy an irrepressible desire for sex, to have an orgasm, to check your compatibility with the partner before considering a relationship, because it is exciting to sleep the first night with a stranger … There are many arguments for it.
Against going to bed on the first night: the will to wait to increase the desire and the fear of being seen as an easy girl.
Sex on the first date: 6 arguments for and against
Despite being in the 21st century, it can be difficult to completely abandon some of the outdated “rules” associated with sex and dating. For example, the stereotype about intimacy after the first meeting, which means that you are easily accessible. In fact, outdated social norms should not influence your decision in one direction or another, because sex on the first date is completely normal.
Society has come a long way, but even in 2021, some women still believe that if they have sex on the first date, they will automatically be branded as “unmarriable.” Thankfully, the stigma surrounding sex on a first date is changing fast. According to a survey conducted by OkCupid, 46% of users consider having sex on their first date. However, there are some things to consider before deciding whether to have sex on a first date or not.
There are several reasons why sex on a first date is not just a good idea, but a really great idea:
1. You can determine the compatibility at the initial stage
If you feel chemistry at the end of the evening, then go ahead, no matter what others think. Studying bedroom compatibility from the start can help you determine if you really want to invest the time and effort into a relationship with this person. Sex on the first date can be liberating and arousing. It can help you let go of your personal preconceptions about sexuality, heal past shame, and boost your self-esteem. If you decide to have sex on the first date, this should in no way affect your solvency as a partner. Many couples officially get together after the first date, so having sex early on shouldn’t be a problem as long as you feel for each other and there’s mutual agreement.
2. It helps to determine if there is sympathy between you.
It often takes time to figure out if the other person is right for you. But it happens that you meet someone and you just know. If you really like someone, you shouldn’t let outdated dating rules get in the way.
3. You get the opportunity to have sex
If you’re both attracted to each other, why fight it or delay gratification? And if after that you are no longer so passionate about each other, you only hastened the inevitable end. The anticipation of intimacy wouldn’t change the lack of interest after sex.
Tip: Be clear about what you’re looking for (relationship? casual sex?) before you go to bed so you can both make an informed choice and be honest about your expectations. Safety should be the number one priority on a first date. Do not sleep with a person who does not want to disclose information about their sexual health, or with someone who refuses to use protection or puts pressure on you.
Why you shouldn’t have sex on the first date:
1. You should never use sex as a way to please someone.
Pay attention to your intuitive reactions when meeting a new person. We usually get good intuitive clues about whether a person is safe and decent, so don’t ignore your instincts. Do not use sex as a way to make someone like you more or to prove something. If you have sex on the first date just to meet the other person’s expectations, it can lead to regrets, resentment, and negative beliefs about yourself that can affect your overall sexuality.
2. Different goals
If both partners want to have fun, sleep and break up, then this is one thing. But if one partner is looking for something serious, and you are not (or vice versa), then this is a completely different story. Feelings after sex can be painful if both parties are not on the same wavelength.
3. First date sex can be pretty bad.
Even if your partner really likes you, sex may still not be very good, simply because you do not know what he likes in bed. If this happens, you will most likely write the person off (or your partner will write you off), when really all you need is more practice.
So what is the final conclusion about sex after the first date?
It depends on the circumstances. The main thing is to remember the importance of honest communication, both with your companion and with yourself. If you feel this is right, and if you are open and truthful about what you are looking for, then go for it. If the situation is different, then there is nothing wrong with waiting. And remember: outdated social norms should not influence your decision in one direction or another.