Not every father decides to be alone with his child for a couple of weeks. And even more so – to spend the holidays together. In fact, this is perhaps the best way to establish a dialogue and be pleasantly surprised by each other.
When my son was six, my wife and I separated. He lived with me for a long time, but the closeness between us disappeared. I did not want to put up with his inevitable distance. Somehow I remembered my childhood dream – to get to the ends of the Earth … The expedition was prepared together with my son: we decided to go from Moscow by car, zigzag through the whole of Europe, read reviews on the Internet, received visas … We traveled 10 countries, walked along the canals of Venice, got to the World Cup in Berlin, survived a snowstorm on a pass in the Apennines, tried gazpacho and snails, laughed, quarreled and put up, and so they reached the “end of the Earth” – Cape Finisterra in northwestern Spain. There all the roads were cut off, there was only the ocean ahead! I experienced some incredible feeling: my dream came true! Four years later, my son and I were already kayaking in Karelia, and now we are planning a trip to America.
Share impressions and experiences. Men are often afraid to get bored when left alone with their children, and do not understand: what to talk about with them when all the words are over? Bring up? On the trip, I suddenly realized what a happiness it is just to live together day after day. Joint time is compressed and saturated with impressions, emotions, when you share food and trials equally.
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Better understand each other. “Such trips “undermine” the usual roles, make parents and children partners,” comments the gestalt therapist Sergey Korchevoi. “The partnership situation removes some of the fears and psychological defenses that the child unconsciously builds at home – in an atmosphere of rivalry with the father or misunderstanding.”
talk like a man. “In a male company, the boy becomes more active, internally mobilizes and learns to make decisions in dynamic circumstances,” adds Mikhail Guleikov, business coach and traveler. “He feels responsible for what he is entrusted with.” A man, on the contrary, has to be more flexible, to compromise. And besides, a personal example works better than words – both in making decisions and in overcoming obstacles on the way to the goal. We can say that a man truly lives his fatherhood, showing his son his view of the qualities and role of a man in the family.