Contents
The codes of male beauty are changing. And the attitude of men towards their appearance is changing: taking care of yourself no longer means questioning your masculinity. First person stories.
Today, men have to take care of their figure and appearance: without this, they can neither win women’s attention, nor take a good position. Five explicit stories… and five naked bodies.
Maxim, 41, sports coach: “I created a work of art”
“I have been doing judo for 27 years and only did what I thought about my body … I woke up with the thought of how it would react to the load, I knew how to feel those very critical 5 grams that decided whether to participate in competitions or not, I forced him to go through pain, because in big sport it is commonly believed that pain makes you stronger. Constant torment. As a teenager, I had complexes because of my sports hobbies. It is often said that athletes are dumb. But you can’t win if you don’t develop your own strategy for winning, and for this you need a brain! Over time, I realized: I became interested in working with the body to spite the family. We are all busy with creativity: my grandfather was a writer, my brother also composes, my mother is an artist, my father is a journalist. They pressed me with their intellect. And then I decided that I would also create a work of art – my own body. Now I keep in shape because I believe that the male body should be proportional, with clearly defined muscles. I started doing yoga to achieve a balance in the development of the body and spirit, and I realized that my soul is good when I play sports … but in small doses!
The place at the mirror in the bathroom until recently belonged exclusively to women. For some time now, the inviolability of this territory has been violated: men armed themselves with their own cosmetics and began to explore new sensations and opportunities for self-realization. “Men try to please themselves,” says sexologist and psychotherapist Alain Héril, “this has never happened before! They constantly evaluate themselves. And it seems that taking care of their body becomes a special form of narcissism for them. Previously, they were only concerned about the size of the penis. Now I have more and more patients who want foreplay…for themselves!”
Read more:
- New codes of male beauty
Is it possible to see a sign of “feminization” in this love of men for themselves? “No,” says anthropologist Gilles Boetsch. – This is a consequence of the so-called cult of youth and complex relationships with the body in our culture. We have an idea of how to treat him, including different ways to keep him in shape: diet, sports, surgery. Taking care of your body is our social capital. According to society, those who do not take care of themselves inexorably grow old and lose their competitiveness. The unspoken requirement to look good primarily applies to those who occupy a high position on the social ladder. The leader must be tanned, muscular, slender – otherwise his right to occupy a high position will be called into question. The woman introduced an aesthetic criterion into competition in the labor market. Men in response began to use the same weapon in the fight. And while we rejoice that men discover new pleasures, we also worry about them. After all, women already know that caring for beauty can turn into an endless race and lead to serious suffering. Well, in any case, men have been warned: once you enter the bathroom, you won’t get out so easily.
Read more:
- A new relationship model: gentle men and strong women
Alexander, 48, stylist: “My body is my truth”
“I have always liked my body, although my mother kept repeating that I was indecently fat. I do not argue, I do not look like a modern ideal. But look at the canvases of the Renaissance and you will see my portrait: a powerful torso, strong legs. No one would think that a romantic soul lives in such a body. Meanwhile, it is. Nature has generously endowed me with such a body, and I take care of it. For example, I indulge myself with delicious dishes. I hate fitness centers, but I’m not against outdoor sports. I go skiing, cycling, swimming in the sea, in winter I can plunge into the hole. I’m not at all embarrassed to strip naked. My body is my truth, the truth of a mature man. I like to choose my clothes, it’s not always easy, but I’m pleased when I look good from all sides. Am I afraid of getting old? But no! In my opinion, a 60-year-old man in his prime can be very attractive. You know, I’ve always felt comfortable with my body. And for the first time I clearly felt it at the age of five. It was at a resort, at a disco. Suddenly, the body, as if by itself, independently of me, begins to move, it enters the rhythm, and now I’m already dancing with everyone together, and it’s so easy for me, so much fun!”
Read more:
- “Fullness does not mean illness!”
Gerard, 45, actor: “Nudity is liberation”
“From the age of six, when I played a role in the first series of Cursed Kings, until the age of 35, I starred in a lot of TV shows, I was an actor and a model. My body, its beauty, its conformity to standards influenced the way my life unfolded. I always believed that this was a gift from nature, and I understood that there are people more beautiful than me, but there are also uglier. I am not ashamed to undress – I know that I have something to show. But it is difficult to “undress” me psychologically. I don’t know exactly what I’ll find! I practice nudism. Nudity gives a feeling of psychological freedom. To do this, you must accept yourself and others. When we take off our clothes, we also take off our social mask, leaving just a person as he is. More and more men are doing full hair removal – I don’t understand this. Why erase the traces of time by creating a body with no signs of maturity? I don’t do anything to keep my body in shape, but I’m afraid of aging. Not wrinkles, but pain, I’m afraid to weaken. I have two children, and I want them to be at peace with their body, accept it as it is. The mass media impose on them models of beauty that are completely impossible to match.
Denis, 44, bank employee: “I got out”
“I lost 42 kg in 2 years. It was a special program that the Institute of Nutrition picked up for me. I went there not so much for beauty, but because of health: I was painfully overweight, weighing 140 kg with a height of 180 cm. Losing weight, I felt great, and the words “It’s time for dinner!” aroused great jubilation. I kind of looked at my body from the side, studying it. For the first time in my life, I could see my neck, and before it seemed that the head was attached directly to the shoulders. Where there was only fat before, bones showed through. It was like a zipper opened and I got out of the package! The trainer helps me to work on the figure: massage, exercise equipment … Now I’m thinking about whether to do another liposuction. I began to like myself, before going to work I try on different costumes, admire myself in the mirror, in full growth, and before I looked only at my face. It is clear that new opportunities will open up for me in sex as well. But something worries me … I used to be a kind of hero, and now the average man, not thin, not fat. How successful will I be?”
Kirill, 24, realtor: “The motto is on my skin”
“My body has become beautiful through exercise (1 hour at the gym every day to pump up the abdominal muscles and expand the shoulders – in my opinion, this is a sign of masculinity). I take care of my appearance, pluck too thick eyebrows, moisturize my skin, use cream for circles under the eyes, get a manicure once a month by a specialist and monitor my nutrition almost all the time – except on weekends when I give myself an indulgence … All this requires effort, but where to go? We are so often judged, loved, hired “by clothes” – depending on our appearance! Probably, from this point of view, we young people are less free than previous generations. At the same time, this showcase body is a shell that protects me. It radiates self-confidence, representativeness. I’m not afraid to grow old. And the older I get, the more connected I feel between my soul and my body. I recently got a “Let me dream” tattoo. That is, he wrote his motto right on the skin, he was not afraid to admit his sensitivity. And I felt that three hours of pain turned the body of a teenager into the body of a man who is ready to openly declare his principles.