It is not always easy for us to manage our emotions. It happens that we ourselves understand that we are making an elephant out of a fly, but still we are unable to cope with our own feelings. Tatyana Popova, an expert at the Moscow Institute of Psychoanalysis, talks about simple but effective ways to reduce the intensity of emotions before they start to spoil our relationships with others.
Against the backdrop of changing events, we often experience irritation. Yesterday we were ordered to stay at home and we did not know how to adapt to a new way of life. But now two months have passed, and the period of lifting restrictions is approaching. We begin to feel anxious: what will happen next? And with it comes irritation. Where is it from?
One reason could be «displaced action» where we can’t express our dissatisfaction directly. We feel anger towards a situation or a particular person, but in the end our irritation spills out on loved ones. The situation is reminiscent of the famous Bidstrup caricature — the boss yelled at the employee, the employee yelled at his wife, the wife at the child, the child at the dog, the dog ran out into the street and bit the boss. Justice prevailed, but irritation began to destroy relations.
Sometimes irritation appears when we attribute thoughts, feelings and desires that we cannot accept in ourselves to another person — in psychology this mental mechanism is called projection. For example, we play for time and do not have time to submit a report, but we justify ourselves by explaining what is happening as a lack of time or difficult circumstances. But as soon as we notice that our child did not turn in his homework on time, we immediately suspect him of chronic procrastination and … as a result, we experience irritation and anger.
Art therapy helps to express emotions through art, which can not only inspire, but also heal.
How to deal with it? What to do? Let’s try to look for an answer using art therapy techniques — special ways of working with feelings, emotions and experiences.
Listen to yourself. What does your irritation look like? Maybe the creak of unoiled door hinges? Or the sound when someone runs a fingernail across the glass? Or maybe you imagined a hot fireball? Try to draw an image created by your imagination on paper. It doesn’t matter if you’re not an artist. There is a rule in art therapy: artistic skill is absolutely not important here.
You can do otherwise: draw a scribble and tear it with pleasure, and then, feeling relieved, look at one of the pieces of the sheet — find a funny image, make up a story. Another option: sculpt an image from plasticine. How do you feel now?
Attention to feelings, their recognition and expression is the key to psychological well-being. Art therapy helps to express emotions through art, which can not only inspire, but also heal. And if you feel that you can’t cope with disturbing emotions on your own, then you should contact an art therapist.