By the number of our friends at age 20 and the quality of our personal relationships with them at age 30, we can predict how prosperous the middle life of each of us will be.
Psychologists Cheryl Carmichael and Paul Duberstein of the University of Rochester in the US interviewed more than a hundred former students who took part in social interaction research in the 1970s. In this study, 222 young people in their 20s and 30s kept diaries in which they rated their daily interactions with people in terms of emotional closeness and pleasant or unpleasant interactions.
In modern times, researchers have been able to contact 133 of them and ask them questions about their psychological well-being (covering topics such as loneliness and depression) and the quality of their relationships with friends. They found that a favorable psychological state in middle age was associated with the number of friends in their 20s and the quality of their friendships in their 30s. the network of social ties at this age can interfere with the development of meaningful relationships with loved ones. It is noteworthy that not all of those who led an active social life at age 30 managed to build close and meaningful friendships and personal relationships by age 50.
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“When we are young, we study and explore the world, trying to collect as much information about it as possible – in particular, we communicate with a large number of people. When we are over 30, our goals usually change, the social circle narrows, but we pay more attention to each person in this circle and build more meaningful relationships, ”says Paul Duberstein.
The authors believe that active social interaction in youth allows us to learn a variety of skills that will be useful in the future, and also helps us to better understand ourselves. “It is at this age that we meet people of very different backgrounds, whose opinions and values may differ from ours, and we learn to find a common language despite differences and disagreements,” adds Cheryl Carmichael.
Подробнее см. С. Carmichael et al. «In your 20s it’s quantity, in your 30s it’s quality: The prognostic value of social activity across 30 years of adulthood», Psychology and Aging, 2015, vol. 30, № 1.