Format of communication with the Elders

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​​​​​​​The format of communication with parents, leaders, seniors in military rank, a judge implies an expression of respect for them. In particular, this means the requirements:

• Compliance with subordination, obedience to the orders of seniors in rank or position.
• Do not grimace when answering your parents, leader or senior in rank.
  
• Do not interrupt a senior in rank or a leader when he formulates an order. Repeat, as I understood the order of the leader.
• Stand up when talking to a senior. Similarly, in court, when the judge enters.
• The format of communication with the Elders often involves a mandatory form of address. Not «Uncle», but «Comrade Captain of the Second Rank», not «My Dear Bonaparte», but «Sir» («My Lord»).

If someone behaves inappropriately with the Elders, then the Elder can immediately give instructions on how to behave.

The relationship between parents and children at the same time cannot be reduced to instructions, and without instructions it is impossible. Instructions are one of the natural and necessary elements in communication between parents and children. Simple and clear instructions are needed in a relationship with a small child who does not understand complex things and ornate appeals; clear instructions will be very useful when a child with your help masters any new business or at least for the first time does a difficult exercise from homework; firm instructions are given by the parents to the child when the child tries to disobey the parents while they address him in a gentle way.

The more clearly and calmly (without shouting and indignation) the instruction is given, the more likely it will be understood and carried out. If it didn’t work right away, you can repeat it again, just as calmly and even more separately, carefully looking into your eyes.

If suddenly this did not work (it happens extremely rarely), this is already a declaration of war with all the consequences. Or you’re just dealing with a clueless person who doesn’t understand anything. They can be bypassed, just as a chair or a rabid dog is bypassed.

In families where children are taught to respect their parents, children carry out the instructions of their parents in the same way that employees carry out the instructions of the boss. Namely:

When the boss gives the task, the employee does not ask “Why me? Why should I?”, but listens carefully to what needs to be done and clarifies the details. If an employee does not agree with the order of the boss, he can ask permission to express his opinion on this matter before execution.

Assigned is done properly and on time. If there are difficulties, the employee does not get upset and does not give up, but informs the boss about what is happening and then acts according to new instructions.

The assigned issue must be closed, that is, the execution must be reported to the management and confirmation received that everything has been done and as it should. The form of such a question is not “Well, is that all?”, but “Is there anything else that needs to be done? Is there anything else I can help with?»

Unconditional priority of the conversation with the Elder before the conversation with equals. If an employee is approached by a boss, the employee is not distracted by conversations with colleagues or calls from home. If a child is approached by a father or mother, the child is not distracted by questions and conversations with a brother or sister until the parents have completed their conversation with him.

If the boss is dissatisfied with the actions of the employee, the employee does not discuss the behavior of the boss, but clarifies what should be done and how in the future. If the elder is dissatisfied with the younger, the younger does not take offense and does not convince the elder, but asks what is the reason, corrects the situation and draws conclusions for the future. If parents are dissatisfied with the reaction of their son or daughter, the son or daughter does not express any frustration or discontented surprise like “Ancestors, what are you doing?”, but listen carefully to the essence of the complaint, apologize and do what is necessary.