Contents
Flirting on Instagram is another story: the good and the bad
Sexuality
Social networks allow us to know the tastes of a person, but there are also other aspects such as the veracity of the content that make it difficult to find a partner is an easy task
Covid-19 has changed many things and among them is the way of flirting. The fact that someone approaches us at the bar of a bar is completely ruled out, so they have had to arise new ways of approach, and social networks have all the ballots, specifically Instagram, the app with little more than a decade of life that has about 1.000 billion registered users.
What if “likes”, comments on fixed posts, responses to the “stories” … He who does not fool around on this social network is because he does not want to. Lara Ferreiro, psychologist and sexologist, finds many advantages in the fact that find love for this application, although there are also several disadvantages that call into question any trust that these online spaces can give us.
«You have access to a whole world with one click, and one of the main good things about finding a partner in this social network is that you reach all the contacts and put names and surnames. Even many times it is good to see that we have people in common “, says the psychologist.
In addition, a study confirms that up to 50% of women felt safer by flirting on Instagram or Tinder because it seemed more harmless to them. The sexologist points out that on Instagram you can upload all kinds of photos and gives a slight impression of knowing everyone’s tastes.
Advantages and disadvantages of flirting online
But not everything is rosy. If social networks even allow us to know the formation of a person and the subject of flirting is done indirectly Because of getting noticed by answering stories or giving “like”, there are also other aspects that make it difficult to find a partner is an easy task.
«It is very easy to put an icon in response to a stories and thus the ice is easily broken, but you also have to be very careful with posture profiles. We get an idea of his life but many times it can all be a lie and we have to analyze it objectively, “says Lara Ferreiro.
And continuing and unfollowing are the new “it’s not you, it’s me.” For all those who have a lot of respect for face-to-face conversations, on Instagram and others social networks like Tinder it is as simple as hitting “unfollow” or undoing the “match”. And if I’ve seen you, I don’t remember.
Of course, “be very careful” with create expectations: “Many people are attracted to what they see on Instagram but you have to be careful because you can spend a lot of time that is ultimately useless,” he warns. The psychologist also warns of the importance of not misinterpreting messages, since many times the “likes” do not mean that the person seeks to fool around.
Commandments
For Lara Ferreiro, it is necessary to ask herself a series of questions when she is going to try to link through social networks:
– “What am I looking for?”.
– “What does the other person want from me?”
– Location: “Does this person live in my city or would he have to live a long-distance relationship?”
– Look at the types of messages sent by that specific person.
– «Do you ask questions about me or only superficial ones?».
Microinfidelities
Now that we know that there are infidelities that do not seem like it but they are, we can determine that Instagram is an important focus where they are produced in large quantities. This type of infidelity thanks to new technologies is very comfortable and recurring. “Sexting”, which is the exchange of photos or erotic content with a third person, or cyber-sex, could be another way of being unfaithful.
«It is very comfortable since you can connect at any time you want (even if your partner is at home). In fact, 9 out of 10 unfaithful Ashley Madison use their mobile to cheat on their partner. 59% say that thanks to technology it is easier to find someone “, says the expert.
As the psychologist says, in Ashley Madison 69% of couples who are faithless They assure that their sexual relations have improved to a great extent because when some needs are not covered by the couple, on Instagram they find a way to supply them.
The language of love
“The 5 Languages of Love” is a book written by Dr. Gary Chapman in 1992, about the fact that all couples thrive on mutual understanding of how we like to receive love, our own language of love. Sometimes the form of expression of our partner does not always resemble ours. Therefore, it is important to understand that this does not mean that they love us less. The five languages of love are:
Words of affirmation. Receive verbal or written compliments, warm terms, appreciation …
Quality time. Receive the full attention of your partner, be listened to, do activities together or spend time as a couple.
Acts of service. Acts that make your life easier such as taking care of housework, taking care of yourself when you are sick, demonstrating with actions instead of words.
Gifts. Receive tokens of appreciation, which do not necessarily have to be expensive, but do represent love and affection.
Physical contact. Receive physical signals of affection such as kisses, hugs, caresses, sex.
“Over time, people evolve and personal needs change. As a result of being unfaithful, the Ashley Madison users realized that their partner did not cover all their emotional and sexual needs since their spouse does not speak the language of love they need, they do not even know it “, says Lara Ferreiro, psychosexologist from the Ashley Madison platform.
Services:
– 75% of the men surveyed and 44% of the women choose physical contact as their preferred way to receive love.
– 67% of Spaniards affirm that their lovers satisfy their “language of love” better than their partners.
Advantages of flirting online
- Phone icons aid in dialogue.
- Mutual friends can be discovered.
- We get a glimpse of his life thanks to the content he uploads.
Disadvantages
- The profile of the social network may not be true.
- Keep in mind that both are in the same city or close.
- Find the same type of relationship.
- There is no face to face.