Finally, you are going to rest. Only the sun, the sea and you – one on one. This vacation can solve everything. What problems await a couple traveling together for the first time, psychologists argue.
Tickets are bought, suitcases are ready, traveling with a new partner becomes a reality. But before leaving, you begin to doubt: what if you made a mistake, suddenly you realize that you are not feeling well together?
Such questions are inevitable, wherever you go, whether it’s a vacation by the sea or a trekking trip to Peru. You do not choose to see each other or not depending on your mood, there is no way to hide the tendency to disorder and laziness in the morning. On a shared vacation, you decide to be with your partner 24 hours a day.
You really open up to each other
“The decision to go somewhere together means taking with you not only two suitcases, but also two stories, two worlds created from personal habits and life experiences,” says psychotherapist and sexologist Massimo Cher.
Thus, the partners sign a tacit agreement of trust.
“Without sharing everyday intimacy with each other, it is impossible to know which partner really is,” comments psychologist Giulio Cesare Giacobbe.
We get to know the partner’s body better, his desires, including sexual preferences
The way he drinks coffee, wakes up, his automatic gestures – there are many such details, and you notice them when you spend a lot of time together. Travel allows each to observe the other. In an environment far from the usual life, the nature of the partner is more clearly manifested.
“At that moment, when my girlfriend and I went to Madrid, we met for six months,” says 24-year-old Peter. “I thought I knew her well, I spent the night at her house several times a week. So I was sure that we would have a great holiday. What a nightmare it was! While we were at home, she seemed to be a super active person. In Spain, a woman appeared before me who was not interested in anything, lay in bed until noon and complained of various pains every 10 minutes of walking … As a result, I came to the conclusion that my next relationship would begin with a weekend abroad.
“In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, everyone does what they want and adjusts their life rhythm to their own needs,” Giacobbe explains. “During the trip, on the one hand, we are freer, but on the other hand, we must adapt to the partner’s needs, pace, desires.”
Lounging together, we get to know the body of a partner better, his desires, including sexual preferences. That’s why a vacation for two is important for the intimate life of lovers, Cher emphasizes.
Let’s not forget that the atmosphere of travel enhances desire and can contribute to the idealization of relationships.
“We want everything to be good so much that we see our partner in the best light,” says Giacobbe. “At the same time, we try to be what they want us to be.”
Traveling together becomes a paradise for the formation of new habits of the couple, a neutral territory where, far from family or professional problems, partners build love and sexual habits in relationships.
With the first journey, lovers begin a new story. In the future, they will often remember this first vacation together and the magic that arose in it. Most often, partners plan for the future at a time when they are away from home, in a relaxed atmosphere, when there is time to talk about their desires, including the desire for a more serious relationship. Travel does not necessarily mean a break with everyday life, it helps to play with it, to imagine how life together at home could look like.