Find yourself in the dance

People fall in love with dancing in different ways: some start with improvisations to their favorite music, dance at home, in clubs, at discos, giving an outlet for their energy. Someone at a certain moment becomes a little arbitrary movements, and he goes to a dance school. Others, on the contrary, first master the dance technique, and then begin to improvise.

“The main thing is that it makes them happy and gives them a good mood,” says Alexander Girshon, dancer, psychologist, host and author of trainings and master classes in dance and movement therapy.

For some, dancing is an opportunity to keep themselves in good physical shape, others are attracted by new acquaintances, communication with like-minded, creative people. There are more and more people who want to dance: participating in a sociological survey of the Public Opinion Foundation “How do you prefer to spend your free time?”, 19% of Russians reported that they are engaged in dancing.

All dance lovers are unanimous in one thing: their passion is a kind of way to know yourself, to talk frankly with yourself. So why is it that some of us are crazy about tango, and someone selflessly masters belly dancing? Someone loves salsa, and someone prefers waltz? Let’s try to get answers to these questions.

Tango: harmony of a couple

“I first saw tango dancing a few years ago in a Moscow cafe. It sounded like an old tango, and the dancers – just a few couples – moved in a bewitchingly beautiful way, – says 29-year-old Evgenia. “However, it took me two or three years to decide to try dancing myself. It is impossible to describe what a new quality my life has acquired, with what colors it has played!”

Tango originated in the port taverns of Buenos Aires and surprisingly combines the hot Latin American temperament and the chastity of the Catholic country. Restrained and passionate at the same time, it involves a very special relationship in a couple. The man is a XNUMX% leader, he takes full responsibility for the movement of the couple. The role of a woman lies in sensitive following, ability and readiness to completely entrust her body to a partner.

“In modern society, our social roles are blurred. And it seems to me that we all experience constant stress from this, ”says Evgenia. “A woman has to be strong, and a man has to give up his leadership. In tango, the traditional female and male roles are rigidly fixed. Therefore, you can finally relax and feel like a woman. The same, in my opinion, applies to a man – here he can finally feel the full trust of a woman and realize his leadership.

“Choosing this dance, a person most likely wants to get what he lacks in a real relationship: a woman can feel weak and patronized, a man – an unconditional leader,” Alexander Girshon confirms.

Here is the story of Irina, who believes that it is tango that she owes to huge changes in her personal life: “Before taking up tango, I broke up with Andrey. Our relationship suited me in many ways, but I was terribly depressed by the need to make all the serious decisions myself, to be strong all the time, to be responsible – both for my life and for our relationship. I was looking for a strong, dominant man.

But, as soon as this appeared in my life, I realized that this did not suit me: he single-handedly decided where we would go, what we would eat, when we would get married and how many children we would have! This turned out to be completely unacceptable for me. And after some more time, we met again with Andrey and … until we part. It seems to me that doing tango – a dance in which a man leads – allowed me to “play out” the role of a weak woman and begin to relate to the real situation in a different way.

“Tango is a very sensual dance,” comments Alexander Girshon. – Restrained in form, incredibly passionate in content. It does not have the overt sexuality of other Latin American dances, it is a “storm of passion” hidden deep inside.

When dancing tango, we overcome the fear of another person, plunge into sensual and emotional intimacy and, without saying a word, we talk with the help of movements. And in this conversation, one must be not only intoxicated, but also concentrated: even a tiny wrong step can temporarily disrupt the harmony of the couple. As, however, in life.

Oriental dances: love for yourself

Oriental dances glorify femininity: it doesn’t matter if a woman is tall or small, thin or plump – oriental dances, originally born as a worship of the goddess of fertility, allow not only to satisfy the longing for the disappeared rituals, but also to accept your body as it is.

“I have always been unhappy with the way I move, I thought that I had poor coordination of movements and not at all an elegant body,” says 45-year-old Natalya. “I never thought I could enjoy dancing. I decided to try belly dancing to tighten and strengthen the abdominal muscles, “remove” the stomach after childbirth. In addition, the doctor told me that it is very useful for the entire “female sphere” – blood circulation in the pelvic organs is normalized.

At first, I didn’t succeed, the heavy belt with the monists barely moved, I got tired in just ten minutes. But due to the fact that the environment was exclusively female, I did not complex at all, and gradually things went smoothly. Now I get incredible pleasure from these movements! And even if I don’t have time to attend classes, I just retire to my room, put on a belt and dance. One! You could say it’s like meditation. This dance takes away stress, irritation and fills you with energy in an amazing way.

“There are many versions of the origin of this dance,” comments Vera, a belly-dance teacher. – I like the one that characterizes it as a purely feminine, originally not intended for male eyes. It was danced in harems, in the female half. It is believed that this was part of the ritual of childbirth – the woman’s closest friends rhythmically clapped their hands and danced around her, helping to maintain the rhythm of breathing and the proper functioning of the muscles during childbirth. And only much later did this dance become a dance of seduction performed for a man.

“Dance often makes a person reconsider a negative self-image, and oriental dances in particular,” says Alexander Girshon. – In a sense, we dance out of a desire to show ourselves, to attract attention. And by demonstrating ourselves, we simultaneously find ourselves.”

Waltz: a step towards a dream

This dance at the beginning of the XIX century made a splash. However, the official attitude to the waltz at first was very cautious, at balls it was allowed to dance no more than 10 minutes: the hugs of a gentleman and a lady were considered not quite decent. However, this did not prevent the waltz from conquering Europe soon. Today, the ability to dance the waltz is a sign of aristocracy, a kind of caste sign: after all, it is this dance that is danced at European balls.

“I was born in a small town, my parents divorced, my mother, an elementary school teacher, earned a little,” says 36-year-old artist Veronika. – And I always dreamed of an elegant house, a wealthy husband, children who would study at an elite gymnasium.

After school, I moved to the capital, entered VGIK, met interesting people, but, alas, despite all my successes, including among men, I could not get rid of the “provincial” complex. Some inner voice told me: “All this is not for you.” And then I started to dance the waltz. It seemed to bring me closer to the elect, made me feel like “one of them”.

“Of course, choosing a dance, we realize certain desires and dreams,” comments Alexander Girshon. — Ballroom dancing is beautiful in itself, but it also fulfills our craving for a “beautiful life” — in the symbolic sense of the word. The waltz gives you the opportunity to be transported to another era for a while, to try on a role that is not available in real life. The desire to change appearance, to make an elegant hairstyle, to put on special clothes that tune in to the dance.

“A dress, high-heeled shoes, carefully coiffed hair, make-up – in real life I really miss this,” admits 27-year-old Olga. – But, you must admit, if I, an assistant director, came to night outdoor shooting in an evening dress and high heels, I would look simply comical. It seems to me that this is a problem for many working women – they have to walk either in a strict office suit or in the most comfortable clothes. And ballroom dancing gives all this – an amazing pleasure not only for the body, but also for the soul!

Salsa: safe sex

The word means “sauce” in Spanish. It best conveys the meaning of this dance: salsa is an unimaginable mixture that arose on the basis of various Latin American and Negro dance styles, united by an incendiary rhythm. Brought to New York by Puerto Ricans in the 70s of the last century, salsa conquered Europe by the 90s.

“This dance is liberating,” said Irina, 34, who works as a programmer in Sweden. – It is not surprising that it has become so popular, for example, in the countries of Northern Europe, where people are traditionally very restrained in showing emotions. Salsa awakens sensuality and allows you to express your sexuality without feeling guilty about it.”

This is how Cuban salsa instructor Miguel comments on this: “This is a dance of the liberated body. In order for the movements to work well, it is necessary that everything be absolutely relaxed and at the same time be in good shape, ready to respond to the music and movements of the partner. There is no drama in salsa, like in tango or flamenco, it is an absolutely open, fun dance. At the moment when a person dances salsa, all the complexes associated with his body disappear somewhere – this is a completely happy person!

A high head, an inviting look, erotic movements of the hips and shoulders: “This is a dance of irresistible, frank sexuality,” says Alexander Girshon. – It is preferred by energetic people who love life in all its manifestations. Or those who really want to be like that.