Hello, dear readers of Valery Kharlamov’s blog! The psychopathic type of character implies a person’s lack of the ability to empathize, to experience sincere feelings, she is not able to undergo a full adaptation in society, but she is perfectly able to adapt to it, control those who are nearby and skillfully manipulate them. Also, she has no conscience. Usually at the word «psychopath» there are fantasies about a maniac who brutally kills his victim. Some similarities have a place to be — he can heartlessly mock a loved one, only morally. Therefore, they may well turn out to be an old neighbor, a colleague at work and, seemingly, a dear, beloved husband. And today I will talk about the signs by which you can “figure out” such an individual in order to protect yourself from him for security purposes, or just be on the alert if you make the choice to stay nearby.
Classification
To begin with, let’s look at what they are, depending on the accentuation of the character.
Neurasthenic
Contrary to the expected bloodthirsty image, this type of psychopathy is weak, shy and timid. He has low self-esteem, and a mostly exhausted nervous system. She is depleted due to the fact that he has a high level of impressionability, that is, for example, seeing a drop of blood, they will lose balance for a long time.
They are easy to offend, even a meaningless skirmish with a salesperson in a store can knock the ground out from under his feet, he will be confused and, most likely, will not know how to behave and react. Because of this, he often suffers from insomnia and headaches.
Psychasthenic
A bit similar to the previous type, only they differ in increased narcissism. Why is he constantly in search of flaws in himself and areas in which he is not yet perfect. He is pedantic and punctual, and requires adherence to strict boundaries from those around him.
They are afraid of changes and changes, as they can fantasize many terrible consequences for themselves, almost bringing themselves to a nervous breakdown.
Schizoid
Closed, does not let anyone close, it seems that he is completely devoid of the ability to experience any feelings, as he is constantly cold and without emotional. But in fact, he knows how to worry, only about his difficulties, thoughts and problems.
Other people’s sorrows and troubles really leave him indifferent, he does not know how to become attached and love, which is why family partners usually suffer and, unable to withstand such detachment, file for divorce.
He is good in business, as he boldly and completely without guilt «goes» over other people’s heads. And also in art — completely immersed in his inner world, and ignoring the people who give feedback and evaluation of his creations, sometimes completely to smithereens, criticizing him, he still does what he wants.
Paranoid
Overly stubborn, says everything that comes to mind, regardless of how his words are perceived by others, and in general, whether they are appropriate. Unlike the schizoid, if you criticize the paranoid and his creation, you will find an enemy for the rest of your life.
He is very vindictive, touchy and vindictive, in addition to everything — he is inclined to think out and invent, why he will inflate even a meaningless remark addressed to him to incredible limits.
Excitable psychopath (epileptoid)
This person is usually pissed off by the slightest trifle, even its absence, but how quickly he «explodes», also quickly cools down, sometimes even repenting, due to which he again becomes furious.
He is constantly dissatisfied with others, finds fault with them and tries to prove his case. It is the representatives of this type who are mainly persons with manic manners and other perverse deviations.
hysteric
Differs in simulated behavior, requires constant attention to his person. Feelings are so ostentatious that sometimes they resemble a theatrical production with the participation of one actor. A pathological liar, he needs this to get as much attention as possible, for which he tries every day.
If a person appears in his field of vision that strikes him, he will try in every possible way to copy her behavior, facial expressions and even voice. I think it’s not worth saying that he achieves success as an actor.
affective
In turn, it is divided into three subtypes:
- Hypothymic — a person with a constantly bad mood, unable to feel joy and happiness. We can say that this is a pessimist in the square, but an excellent worker, because he sees only shortcomings and mistakes, trying to bring the result of his work almost to perfection.
- Hyperthymic — on the contrary, an eternally active and incredibly happy individual, he has excessively high ambitions along with a lack of empathy for others.
- Cycloid — the most unstable and unpredictable, alternately falls into depression, then suddenly becomes the most inveterate optimist. Moreover, the cycles can replace each other within one day, which makes it very difficult to navigate and understand how to interact with it.
Unstable
He does not have his own opinion, he needs someone who will manage him, otherwise, once in a socially unfavorable environment, he can easily become a drug addict, alcoholic or a person without a fixed place of residence. He is not able to make decisions, make choices and critically assess the circumstances.
Evidence
So, let’s now look at the main signs by which it will be easy to determine the presence of a person with psychopathic tendencies nearby. Believe me, it is not so easy, despite the types described above. They are often completely indistinguishable from other people and do not arouse suspicion, especially at the beginning of their acquaintance. They are friendly, guess your desires, caring and compassionate.
But this is only for a certain period, then, realizing that you are trapped, he shows his true face, turning your life into a nightmare. So, the main «bells» by which you can identify this «emotional monster»:
1. Seems perfect
Only having met, he recognizes your needs, desires and weaknesses, therefore, skillfully pulling the necessary strings, conquers, overwhelms with attention, sharing views on life, opinions and even interests. Usually men behave this way, it seems that, finally, a miracle happened and a person appeared in life who is able to understand you. Relations with him are developing at the speed of light, all hidden dreams and fears, stories that no one knows about, and so on, are revealed to him.
The only difference with normal relationships is that this fairy tale is interrupted in an instant. The partner tries to behave in such a way as to earn favor again, but nothing helps, which is why the victim, being in despair, is ready to do anything to feel loved again.
2. Plays on feelings
Can tell sad stories, wanting to evoke pity and other feelings that upset you and cause pain. Over time, you will find that too many tragedies surround him. Then, either you doubt the veracity of the stories, or you want to help in order to make life easier for such a good and undeservedly suffering person, whom others offend and betray.
3. Involvement in a love triangle
It is not necessary that he will cheat, you just get the impression that the partner is very popular among the opposite sex. Therefore, even if you are not jealous, there will come a moment when you will lose your appetite and sleep, tormented by guessing where he is and with whom, and whether he still loves you.
You will be aware of all his previous relationships, and even with a comparative characteristic, at first in your favor, as well as all calls and manifestations of attention. If you do not react, believe me, it will still find a weak spot, which it will put pressure on.
4. Distortion of reality
Whatever you say, any words and actions will be «twisted» and used against you. Attempts to introduce a rational link and refute disinformation will be stopped instantly, you will be accused of all mortal sins. So the only thing left is to stop trying to prove the truth and agree that the blame for something lies with you, and you yourself are going a little crazy.
Somewhat similar to the behavior of perverted narcissists, you can see by looking at the article «How to recognize a perverted narcissist and how to counter him so as not to become a victim.»
5. Provocation
Brings you to an extremely tense and unbearable state, then accusing you of inadequacy. For example, he allows himself to flirt with someone in front of you, then he also denies this fact, which will make you look like the most jealous jealous person.
Or at a party it will gradually infuriate until you lose your temper and attack him with fury, which will put yourself in a completely unsightly light, others will sympathize with this psychopath, considering you a tyrant.
6. Constant lies
Such individuals lie just for the sake of lying. And even if you “pin” to the wall, you won’t get any remorse. Such a person is ready to spend resources to come up with an excuse, but the idea that it is necessary to correct the situation and atone for guilt will not even enter his head. He does not care about your suffering, fatigue from all this and so on.
7. Unexpected ignore
At first you will receive hundreds of messages about how bored he is, and then everything will disappear, you will feel a chill emanating from him, trying to figure out the situation, you will feel that you are downright straining him with your presence.
And when you torment your soul with suffering, having decided that you have lost him, he will appear as if nothing had happened, surprised that you yourself “winded” the movie. Then the situation will repeat itself.
8. Purposeful reduction of self-esteem
In order to gain power and control over you, he will try to instill the idea that no one needs your worthless personality, and you should be grateful that he still tolerates you.
But this is as a result, at first you will lose ground under your feet from the number of admiring responses from him. After that, slowly but surely, humiliation and insults will go, which will just be silently swallowed and endured, otherwise see point number 5.
9. Egocentrism
Only one individual has the right to be at the center of the Universe, and that, of course, is him. Even if the victim is a woman, attention, worship and admiration should be directed only to him.
10. Personality change
Subsequently, close contact with such a monster will affect not only the character, but even physical health. Insomnia will appear, chronic diseases, strength will leave, and it will seem that there is no strength to move on, and in general, it makes sense to live too.
Not only the inner world will be destroyed, but also relationships with others, even with relatives, because it was not permissible for you to waste time on others, and it was easier to agree with this statement than to start challenging and risk losing it.
What to do?
Despite the horrendous consequences, and the thought that life will never be the same, it is quite possible to fix it. It won’t be easy, but it’s real. Of course, for this you have to realize that you have fallen into the clutches of a psychopath, and then limit contact with him. Sometimes «chopping off completely the ends.»
It will be important to restore the relationship not only with once close people, but also with yourself, regaining the right to be and feel. Check out the article «Best Success Methods That Will Help You Finally Believe in Yourself».
They will try to bring you back — try to survive, confessions and actions will be just another manipulation, as in the beginning of a relationship, aimed at returning you to your networks. If you feel that you can’t cope, and you don’t have the strength to fight the pain, be sure to use the recommendations described in the article “How to find a way out of depression yourself: the most effective methods.”
Conclusion
Be careful and attentive, letting a new person into your life, take a closer look at him and his motives. And in order to detect these tyrants in a timely manner, study what are the methods of manipulation, for example, the “10 effective methods of manipulating people” described here.