Some people make us want to protect them, save others from attacks and aggression, pull them out of the «pit» and help them cope with all the problems. Does this mean that we ourselves really need such help?
Does time only flow in one direction? No, if we are talking about the psyche. In the course of natural history, antiquity is replaced by a new era irrevocably, but within the framework of psychic experience we can dive into the past and then return. The state of the adult psyche, which we conditionally call the norm, is a late superstructure over its more archaic layers. And the ancient layer of the psyche is psychosis.
What makes it different from «normal»? No boundaries between inside and outside. When he is included in the work, the images of the unconscious, like pictures from a magic lantern, are projected outward and perceived as real.
There is nothing wrong with this, despite the fact that the name can be scary and hint at problems. The psychotic parts only help the psyche to cope with difficult experiences until another, more effective way is found.
There was a case in the therapy group. Already at the first meeting, 25-year-old Inna felt great sympathy for another participant, her peer Alla. Inna believed that Alla was very vulnerable, took care of her and protected her from the attacks of other participants.
The intensity and speed of Inna’s experiences led me to assume that there were some projections in this relationship.
In an individual session with Inna, we tried to sort this out. She said that since childhood she tried to attract the attention of her parents, but did not receive a response. Her needs were rarely met with a benevolent response.
Our psyche is designed in such a way that an unsatisfied need sinks into the unconscious and continues to influence our lives.
When our unconscious material is tied to basic needs such as security and attachment, it is difficult (too painful) for us to face it directly. To do this, we need some kind of intermediary, and often this is the person with whom we enter into a relationship.
And so, with the help of her psychotic part, Inna «discovered» in her environment someone who, as it seemed to her, needed help just like herself.
In other words, by taking care of Alla, she was trying to satisfy her own need for support. Of course, there were no real changes with Inna. Therefore, my work with her was aimed at ensuring that her unconscious need was recognized and appropriated.
At first, Inna was able to admit to herself that it was she herself (and not Alla) who needed support, and then asked for help and approval from other members of the group. And the need for the work of the psychotic part, acting on the principle “the other is me, what I need, the other needs”, disappeared, because the need began to be satisfied with the participation of more mature parts of the psyche.
Many of us believe that we live in a completely intelligible world and that our concept of ourselves exhausts the entire content of psychic reality. But it is not so.
We are born into a mental norm from psychosis. And in each of us there are little explored areas of the psyche that are associated with our earlier functioning. Sometimes we imperceptibly plunge into the «psychic paleolith». In this case, psychotherapy helps us return to the present.