Eva Weil: “We have a lot of naturally conceived neurotics”

In Russia, IVF (In Vitro Fertilization, from Latin extra – “outside”, outside and Latin corpus – “body”, that is, fertilization outside the body) is still ambiguous. How are things in France? Anyone can use this technology?

In France, four IVF attempts are covered by insurance. But this rule only applies if the man or woman is truly infertile. You can’t do IVF for free just because you wanted to, or because of psychological problems – for example, when there is a phobia of sexual contact. Another limitation is that, according to the law, only a heterosexual couple can use the IVF service. Perhaps in the future homosexual couples will also have access to it.

What laws apply to donor biomaterial?

The donation institute is completely anonymous. At the same time, doctors try to select biological material so that outwardly the child is as similar as possible to the parents. Even if a woman has a friend who is ready to donate her egg to her, she cannot do it directly. She can transfer her biomaterial to the bank, but who will get it is unknown.

What is the psychological profile of the donor?

These are volunteers who want to make a genetic donation. Motives may be different. For example, women who donated sperm then donated their eggs out of gratitude. Someone is driven by an archaic fear: a woman with several children decided to become a donor in order to avoid the envy of barren friends.

It is said that people who are conceived through IVF cannot conceive naturally either. Is it really true?

I do not have such data.

Is it customary to tell children that they were conceived through IVF?

Usually it is not kept secret. It is better to tell, and as soon as possible. Also, problems cannot be avoided if artificial conception was something secret and shameful for parents.

Children are not traumatized by such stories?

Anything can become a trauma – for example, the birth of a brother or sister and the subsequent jealousy of an older child. IVF technology is a product of civilization that meets the needs of modern society. Now more and more couples need artificial insemination. Twenty years ago it was said in our hospital that when the time came to tell the child about the secret of his birth, everyone would be conceived in this way.

Today’s children can ask each other at recess: “And how were you conceived? Natural or artificial? The question is not whether to speak or not, but how to speak about it. In France, there are even special books that help parents correctly present this fact to their child.

What can you say about the splitting of the father figure into biological and social?

We don’t say “biological father”, we say “transmitter of genes”. Sperm is not the father. The process of pregnancy is very important, it allows you to “assign” the child physiologically and psychologically, including the father. And some women even forget that the child was conceived artificially.

Some theorists of transgenerational transmission believe that information is transmitted even at the level of genes. If so, then a person born with donated material will never be able to access their “legacy”?

Perhaps this is true. But in France, sperm and egg donors are only accepted as donors. Parents are those who endured, gave birth and raised a child. In America, for example, all information about donors is open: anyone can find out who was the transmitter of his genes. France has a different culture, it protects those who resort to IVF technology.

But does it protect against transgenerational transmission of trauma?

The gap in genetic transmission does not exclude transgenerational, phantasmatic transmission. The question is whether the chain of generations has been restored and psychologically appropriated. We have a lot of naturally conceived neurotics. Perhaps, from a psychological point of view, a person with a genetic gap will be fine.

Donor anonymity does not increase fear potentially accidental incest?

Of course, there is a risk of meeting a hypothetical relative on the street. But statistical studies claim that it is minimal. In France, there is a law according to which a person can become a donor no more than three times. Of course, all these fears are present in the unconscious. I think we need to expand the space of psychoanalytic theory and think about this difficult topic in a new way.

What other fears and internal conflicts do your patients face?

As a rule, we are dealing with issues that are related to infantile sexuality. People come to the clinic to take advantage of the possibilities of medicine. But in psychological terms, they are like children who turn to some adult who would allow them to show adult sexuality.

Women and men want to understand: why did this happen to me? Why can’t I conceive naturally? Why am I the defective link in the chain of generations, which cannot continue the race?

They get a sense of the unsettling strangeness that Freud wrote about. All these questions lead patients back to their own infantile fantasies about where babies come from. And the answer here can be one: it is the result of sexual relations.

Then the partners begin to think: “The child that I carry (or that my wife endured), is he mine or not?”

Our work will be to build a psychological connection and conduct a genealogical chain to a child who does not genetically belong to his family. It is very important for future parents to understand why they really need a child, so that later they can tell the baby with confidence how much they were waiting for him.

Translation: Olga Chekunkova