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Do you find it difficult to say “no” to requests from colleagues or friends, even if it makes your life difficult? Are you constantly distracted by insignificant trifles and you cannot concentrate on the main tasks? You are not alone: most people today face similar problems.
We are sometimes bombarded with so many cases, opportunities and proposals that sometimes it is easier for us to agree to everything at once than to make a choice. Of course, the result is stress and reduced productivity. How not to waste yourself on trifles? There is only one way out of this vicious circle – to learn to be an essentialist (from Latin essentia – essence), that is, a person who focuses only on the most important. British-American business coach Greg McKeown, blogging at HarvardBusinessReview, shares his experience.
Set Priority
Until the XNUMXth century, the word “priority” (from Latin prior – first) was always used in the singular, which is logical: the first can be one thing. Today we are trying to balance between five to ten priorities. But to cope with all this is impossible, and it is not necessary.
Essentialists understand that there is no such thing as too many priorities. They know how to separate the important and the minor, so from any list of cases they choose a few of the most necessary. You can say that everything is important to you. Then choose what is extremely important. Otherwise, you will not have time for family or leisure, and the work will still suffer: the rush will affect the quality of all the projects you take on. Conclusion: do not settle for everything, invest in one thing.
Separate the grain from the chaff
Imagine that you are an editor and you need to cut out everything superfluous from the text of your daily life. What would you like to tell about yourself? What are your goals, what are you striving for? Get rid of vague formulations and come up with specific tasks for yourself. Then rate any opportunity that arises on a scale of 1 to 100 for meeting your goals. If the score of an option is below 90 points, feel free to discard it. It happens that even good options prevent you from concentrating on something important – do not be afraid to part with them.
Why we don’t like to refuse
It is easier for us to agree to a proposal than to reject it, because this is an action that is more approved and encouraged by the team. But the refusal forces us to look for arguments, to explain the reasons, and therefore requires more effort. In addition, we are terribly uncomfortable upsetting friends, relatives and colleagues by refusing to do something for them. And our life meanwhile turns into chaos.
Try to understand that refusing will not make you a bad person, at worst it will doom you to ten minutes of worries, while a thoughtless “yes” will lead to the loss of something more important and, probably, to weeks or even months of regrets. If you don’t want to waste your life (which is already very short) on trifles, then you should learn to say “no”. Do only what makes sense to you. The point is not that helping others is bad. But you can’t let people shift their business to you. This will not only harm you, but also them, because they will not learn to cope with problems on their own.
Admit your mistakes
Everyone knows how difficult it is to quit what you started. When we take on a task, we treat it as reverently as if it were our own child. Even if in the process of work it suddenly turns out that the project brings only losses, we will not abandon it immediately, but will drag it out to the last.
The Essentialist has the courage to admit his mistake in time and say “stop” to himself. If the case turned out to be unpromising and unnecessary, he simply stops doing it.
Use the following advice. Stop thinking about how much you are missing. Imagine that this particular project does not belong to you yet. What are you willing to sacrifice to get it?
Read more:
- Make a choice: why is it so difficult
I want silence
Essentialists know how to find the time and place to just think. Sometimes it is very useful to switch off from external noise, not to check e-mail and phone every five minutes, not to go to social networks. This is the time when you can think about your goals and plans, decide on an important step or work productively on what is really important.
Isaac Newton, creating the “Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy”, avoided communication with people for two years. Thanks to this, he managed to concentrate, thought only about his ideas and wrote a brilliant work.
Healthy sleep is the way to success
Non-essentialists are trying to do the impossible – reduce sleep time in order to get more done. But in fact, good sleep is the main source of energy and productivity. Blocking it, we block our path to success. If you begin to systematically lack sleep, fatigue will accumulate every day until your brain loses the ability to cope with the tasks at hand.
Trying to get as many things done in a day as possible is a recipe for failure. There is nothing more valuable than your time and health, so is it worth spending them on not the most important things? Essentialists say no to the husk. And you?
* Greg McKeown, business consultant, bestselling author of Essentialism (Mann, Ivanov, and Ferber, 2015), blogging at HarvardBusinessReview. Conducted consultations in companies such as Google, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter.