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Domostroy folk traditions of raising children: how to raise a child
Modern children scoff at animals, peers, do not listen to their elders and burn forests. Why didn’t this happen before?
The traditions of upbringing in Russia are a whole layer of pagan foundations and God’s commandments, thanks to which the foundations of raising children: reverence for parents, respect for old age, fulfillment of duty to the Motherland were inherited.
The first thing that was instilled in children from childhood is a respect for nature. “The nursery land gives a harvest, and if there is no harvest, the whole family will be lost,” they used to say in the old days and have always protected nature from senseless destruction. Now these traditions are being revived within the framework of ecological education, however, the former harmony, which used to be between nature and man, can no longer be achieved.
In his notes, Nikolai Karamzin wrote that our ancestors, leaving the house, always left food for the guest on the table and did not lock the door. Of course, the century is no longer the same and there are many who want to profit from someone else’s good, which lies badly, but at the same time, the traditions of hospitality are gradually leaving Russian life. More and more often, meetings with friends and birthdays are transferred to cafes and restaurants, and children have stopped inviting classmates to their home and rejoicing in guests.
Civic education is not what it used to be. From an early age, children were brought up with respect for power – first, reverence for elders, leaders, then princes. Therefore, Russian soldiers always fought desperately for their land and there was not a single nation in the world who loved their Fatherland so much.
“Own land is sweet in sorrow” – they used to say in the old days, and modern people only think about how to change their place of residence. Patriotic education, learning the anthem, the study of history and state symbols for few people today is an interesting occupation, and it is from these very basics that love for the Motherland begins.
The traditions of the correct attitude to their land, family and homeland have been preserved, probably, only in the Cossacks.
The rules prescribed by the monk Sylvester in Domostroy became the only law that determined the norms of behavior between husband and wife, parents and children in Russia.
When compiling this document, the monk paid much attention to the upbringing of children. And, as we remember, the whole medieval pedagogy was built on corporal punishment – “he is afraid, therefore he respects.”
The duty to raise worthy people from children was imputed to the father and mother, and only they were responsible for how their children would grow up. “Domostroy” promoted not only punishment, but also love and care for children, as well as an example of correct life and actions on the part of parents, only then children in adulthood will have access to all earthly and unearthly benefits.
However, parents were advised to hide their feelings: not to show love and affection deeply and openly, but to be as harsh as possible towards children – this is the only way to instill in them self-respect and reverence.
“If you punish him with a rod, he will not die, but he will be healthier, for you, by executing his body, save his soul from death” – it was written in an old textbook on pedagogy. Otherwise, children will grow up spoiled and in old age they will only bring sorrow and sorrow.
The love of children and parents in those days was measured by deeds, not words. Children had to love their father and mother only because they gave birth to them, and they, in turn, had to give the child his life’s work, a dowry, provide food and shelter.
Pros and cons of education according to the laws of “Domostroy”
The ways of raising children at that time, of course, are frightening. It was possible to get a slap in the face or a spoon on the forehead for the slightest offense, even simply because the father was in a bad mood.
However, upbringing in Russia had its own positive aspects. Everything that their parents did for them was only for the sake of one thing: to raise polite, obedient, hardworking, respectful father and mother, respecting traditions and religious norms. Parental care in Orthodox families was aimed at the well-being of children, and in turn, the children reciprocated them: they loved and appreciated their parents, looked after them in old age.
And, of course, education. A literate person was worth its weight in gold, they took care of books and always listened to an intelligent person with attention. Then there was no problem getting children to learn. It was only for their joy.